M40

A Smidgen of Irreverence Pt.1

April 17 2013

I was told I should write a column for a Men’s Mag. And I would do so, happily. Apparently everyone could do with a smidgen of total irreverence now and then; and apparently I do have a way with words and I’m always good for a giggle. Let’s examine this at its core. In hindsight, I should’ve left school early. I graduated senior year managed a souvenir shop for nearly three years. Bought my first house at 19, and my 2nd at 23 and they’re doing fine. Had to skin my old man alive to get where I am though. By age 18 I had written 7 anthologies of poetry, and by 21 I’d written for both local papers without a shred of a certificate in journalism, or ever having to see the inside of a university campus. I was working up to writing a novel, sure. Isn’t that every writer’s dream? Nah. Fuck it. You just need an image you can milk until the day you die. Then fame. Our government can’t maintain a budget surplus. On top of which they’re bribing women to have kids for $6,000 for every piece of pink meat that breaches the surface. Brilliant economics on the part of the government. Until they complain about a skills shortage. Which would be fine, if in the short term, they weren’t shelling out $6,000 for every child born. On top of which, they’re also increasing the first home buyers grant, which means they must be desperate for infrastructure, while increasing pensions for the disabled and the elderly and reducing benefits for single parents and students. Another brilliant move by our fearless government appointed fuhrer after what commentators are calling the night of no knives. Youth unemployment meanwhile is at 41% nationwide while Gillard stands unopposed. A university education, whether ten years ago or today, would cost roughly $150,000. A four year degree, tuition fees, on top of rent, food and HECS fees, And say I graduate, I’m stuck for another six years, competing against other university graduates with the same credentials for the same shitty job which even if I get, I’ll be stuck at for another four years until I see any benefit to it if at all, assuming I can keep the job that long. Assuming it isn’t outsourced. On top of which I have HECs fees to pay back, if and not when I make over 40K a year on top of losing 20% to tax, paying rent and still managing to eat enough to not pass out from exhaustion. Either way, that’s a ten-year sentence. You’d get less for statutory rape. Or I could risk going even deeper down the financial rabbit hole, and continue on to study beyond Post-Grad in the vain hope that maybe, just maybe I might make my money back before I’m dead, and still, somehow, live long enough to enjoy it. Assuming the government doesn’t jack up the minimum wage or the retirement age even further, while reducing benefits for students and actively discouraging people from getting a decent education in an economy already wounded by and suffering a skills shortage! Does anyone else see a problem here? Nazi Germany was the first country to ban vivisection in the world, enacting a total ban in April 1933. The measure to ban vivisection was put forth to the Reichstag as early as 1927.

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RHP User

13 years ago

There better be pictures Nick... because the if the articles are like your posts, including this odd advertisement... lol.... we're gonna need something to maintain our interest to the end.DG

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RHP User

13 years ago

first world problems are just too awful. You can do a lot with rice.- Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

13 years ago

I have a fabulous story about rice

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RHP User

13 years ago

Economics is a major pitfall and it is easy to sit at our computers and give advice to a government that clearly can not see as we do and whom are not in touch with the plight of the great unwashed masses. Firstly, the baby bonus was established because of low population growth and the desire to have a working populace to take care of our ageing one sometime down the track. It is a sad by line though that the intelligent, wealthier people only have one or two offspring and do not wualify forvthe bonus while the less than intelligent types will breed like rabbits. Lets face it, theirs is not really a gene pool that we want caring for us in our old age. The baby bonus us no longer shelled out in a lump sum which is a good thing. No more big screen tv's from that scheme :-) As for youth unemployment, not a lot can be done unless some manufacturing is started again as that is where unskilled labour is employed. Sadly we are no longer a manufacturing nation as many prefer to spend their hard earned dollar (or welfare dime as the case may be) on cheap imports. Isn't it fabulous that we can buy jeans from KMart for $9? Do any of you know exactly how long it takes to sew those jeans and therefore the rate of pay those minions earned in China to sew them? I for one would not work for that amount of money! Yes a lot can be achieved on a bowl of rice! Why bother with higher education if all it gets you is major debt? It guess that depends on the type of work you want in life or whether you are indeed happy being a long term, third generation unemployed living on said bowl of rice buying cheap imported products and perpetuate the exploitation of the great downtrodden.- Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

13 years ago

totally relevant

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RHP User

13 years ago

well well well maybe we have some pollies on RHP

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RHP User

13 years ago

Awesome shit! loved the read and totally relevant. Why the fuck is education so expensive and why the fuck can't my son get youth allowance! When drug fucked dole bludgers rape the system and SOME woman are to fucking lazy to work and instead pump out kids. AND AND we have immigrants here WHO winge about being here and our Australian traditions though love the benefits we dish out to them. oops hit a nerve.

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RHP User

13 years ago

Fair dinkum Inspirit! You know the answer to your questions, as does any logical minded adult. The welfare system is designed to help those in need. Yes it does have major pitfalls and can appear unjust and sometimes discriminatory. Why should a youth whose combined parental income is high obtain benefits? Surely his parents should support him as they can afford to do so? If you want your child to be eligible for youth allowance the answer is do simple. You and his father need to stop earning so much!!! Not that difficult to understand us it? Education expensive? Try looking at the education costs of other major countries in the Western world! Australia sells education to other countries. If we made it cheaper than competing nations, that us billions if dollars our economy misses out on each year. As for drug fucked dole bludgers raping the system and women being too lazy to work son pump out kids.... as far as I know those drug fucked dole bludgers are subject to the same rules as you or I. Certain requirements need to be met in order to obtain any benefits at all. Raising kids is not easy and I have yet to see someone with five or six kids who can be termed lazy! I don't know where you get your information from but it is highly emotive, short on facts and perhaps you need to have a good long hard look at just how difficult it is surviving on a sole parent pension before mouthing off about something that you are clearly so badly ill informed on! - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

13 years ago

Despite the arduous road you're traveling Nick, it does not sound as if you're about to give up. And that's a good thing..As I heard once: Politicians stand for what we'll fall for..Perhaps you'll enter politics?

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RHP User

13 years ago

You shouldn't believe everything you're told ;)

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RHP User

13 years ago

Quoting 'Handmaiden' Fair dinkum Inspirit! You know the answer to your questions, as does any logical minded adult. The welfare system is designed to help those in need. Yes it does have major pitfalls and can appear unjust and sometimes discriminatory. Why should a youth whose combined parental income is high obtain benefits? Surely his parents should support him as they can afford to do so? I disagree. What happen to equality!! He does not live at home and has living costs like any other person on youth allowance. If you want your child to be eligible for youth allowance the answer is do simple. You and his father need to stop earning so much!!! Not that difficult to understand us it? Education expensive? Try looking at the education costs of other major countries in the Western world! Australia sells education to other countries. If we made it cheaper than competing nations, that us billions if dollars our economy misses out on each year. I do not care about other countires and what they do>>>> I live in Austarlia, my parents worded hard as immigrants, I have worked hard and if we can not supply an affordable higher education for OUR children something is seriously wrong. As for drug fucked dole bludgers raping the system and women being too lazy to work son pump out kids.... as far as I know those drug fucked dole bludgers are subject to the same rules as you or I. Certain requirements need to be met in order to obtain any benefits at all. Drug test them as WE are drug tested to be able to make a quid to pay our taxes for drug fucked dollies. If we tst positive we lose .. so should they! Raising kids is not easy and I have yet to see someone with five or six kids who can be termed lazy! I don't know where you get your information from but it is highly emotive, short on facts and perhaps you need to have a good long hard look at just how difficult it is surviving on a sole parent pension before mouthing off about something that you are clearly so badly ill informed on!Am I so clearly misinformed ......blame it on the media then.....why have 5 or 6 kids if you can not afford them. ANY knowledgeable person knows it cost's money to raise children. Why rely on the government to FULLY support you. handmaiden.....I understand your empathy and sounds like you work in the system. I also understand i vented a little OTT as well. BUT i can still have my say. - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

13 years ago

Nick, do you work for ACA or the Telegraph by any chance? Your hyperbole and smearing (not to mention the misogyny) is off the charts. Love the invoking of Nazi Germany too, ho ho! That's totally what Gillard is, a Nazi! XD lolololWhatever important facts you had in there has been completely invalidated by the stupid rhetoric so commonly used by pundits and spindoctors. You've done nothing but regurgitate the same garbage the media shoves in our face everyday. Good Job!

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RHP User

13 years ago

Have your say by all means but please make it an informed say! I have never been drug tested in my life, In a workbsituation or any orher. I managed to obtain my degree as an adult student and a solo parent, by working. I did not find it too expensive. My daughter paid her own way through uni by working nights. I also know a number of solo parents on this forum whom you have insulted in a huge way. Do not blame the media for your ignorance. Of course you disagree on the matter if your son. After all, if it was someone else's son you would not care, it would not effect you at all. Your child is your financial responsibility until he is 24 I believe. Why have him if you can not care for him! Wasn't those your words? Further more, not all on NEWSTART are druggies. Next week it could be you losing your job!- Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

13 years ago

Thanks handmaiden.

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RHP User

13 years ago

I have to ask, if the OP mentions Nazis in his original post, should the thread implode according to Godwin's law? But seriously I'm glad people are talking about the government raising university fees. As duel citizen who grew up in America where tertiary education is ridiculously overpriced I think it wrong for the Australian government, which has enough means to subsidize education to raise its cost. I wish students here would take more of a stand towards it. From what I've seen in America large student debts owed to banks impact hugely on people's lives once they finish their degree. With that said, I do think HECS is a good system so long as education isn't ridiculously overpriced. As for youth allowance, and speaking as someone who is ineligible for youth allowance in spite of being enrolled full time in university, living out of home for the past 5 years, and having had at least a part time job for those past 5 years, I still think that not everyone should be given youth allowance. If you have parents that have the means to help you, and your family isn't dysfunctional and willing to help you, then the government should have to pay for your rent and should give that money to someone who needs it more. But with that said, I think the youth allowance system is pretty crap, and I've seen it give money to people who don't really need it, while being a difficult system to deal with it for those who actually do.

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RHP User

13 years ago

but garrulous

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RHP User

13 years ago

Yes, yes, I've pretty much achieved what I set out to do. It may be slanderous, regurgitated politick, but aside how horribly emotive, full of spin and un-factual the piece is.... it serves a dual-purpose as a satire, however irreverent, it has achieved its purpose in getting people to discuss the issues raised. Isn't that what quantifies "good" journalism these days, well... at least according to charlie pickering and that filthy arab who fills in for him from time to time. Whats his name, Mohammmed Ali or something? All I'm saying is, that it doesn't matter whether you watch The Project, ACA or TT, the fact is, no news is really news, when coupled with people's dulled and ever-shortened attention spans.... I have to write on par with a spasticated ferret on crystal meth, while distorting facts, over-stepping the boundary and encouraging people to oh I don't know... think for themselves. As much as The Nazis are a personal academic interest of mine, I get just as much out of a Captain America comic, or even Django Unchained. Of course, when the average IQ used to be a 100 its now barely 85 which classifies as borderline mentally retarded. Think about it for a second while I work on Pt. Deuce will ya?

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RHP User

13 years ago

DG

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RHP User

13 years ago

Yor vokabulary is por. Single word answers are for people (and I use that word loosely) of your IQ. Congratulations on proving my point so magnificently. You are indeed correct. You have tickets on yourself. That is all. Take a look in the mirror, and above all... Take that thumb out of your ass!

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RHP User

13 years ago

Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' DG we don't need tickets to Nick's performances .. nor does he need to provide them ... for there are some of us who actually do understand and enjoy his postings .. keep up the good work Nick ..

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RHP User

13 years ago

I could debate, but cant be bothered, there are holes in your speech, and incorrect facts, but go ahead and write as you obviously enjoy it. Perhaps you should instead stick to using your imagination, and write some fiction, then you wont need to pretend you know anything other than how to use a thesaurus

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RHP User

13 years ago

Quoting 'Nick_Wilde' Yor vokabulary is por. Single word answers are for people (and I use that word loosely) of your IQ. Congratulations on proving my point so magnificently. You are indeed correct. You have tickets on yourself. That is all. Take a look in the mirror, and above all... Take that thumb out of your ass! HAHAHAFor someone who considers himself the Andean condor soaring high above it all, and everyone.... ...I expected.... more.DG

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AmiablePrick

13 years ago

For those who know how to live within their means, $150,000 for a four year university course is very luxurious by most student standards, today and 10 years ago - but at the same time, I don't see how you'd need to worry about including the cost of rent in your calculations when you say you already own 2 houses. What the fact it has to do with anything i don't know, but the Nazi ban on vivisection was partly a propaganda tool directed towards restricting the Jewish 'kosher' method of animal slaughter for food, and the ban on vivisection was never formalised into law in the Reichstag. It didn't stop the Nazis experimenting on animals in the name of science, or the more horrifying experiments on humans (including vivisection) such as those known to have been conducted by the SS physician Josef Mengele at the Auschwitz concentration camp. Australian youth unemployment currently 41% nationally. Yeah right. Maybe in your street if you live in North Adelaide. Nationally, youth unemployment has only ever peeked at around 20%. And as for "that filthy arab who fills in for him (Charlie Pickering) from time to time." That would be Waleed Aly. Not exactly sure what you mean by 'filthy'. Sexually filthy perhaps?... but since you threw the word Arab in there as well, to refer to him as a 'filthy arab' - you'd probably need to know he's Australian. Maybe you could benefit by reading something he's written. For starters, I'd recommend his article "Curse of Australia's Silent Pervasive Racism". Shouldn't be too hard to find online and doesn't have too many big words. Ho hum, time for a wank.

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RHP User

13 years ago

Quoting 'Nick_Wilde' All I'm saying is, that it doesn't matter whether you watch The Project, ACA or TT, the fact is, no news is really news, when coupled with people's dulled and ever-shortened attention spans.... I have to write on par with a spasticated ferret on crystal meth, while distorting facts, over-stepping the boundary and encouraging people to oh I don't know... think for themselves. every time 'journalists' quote twitter, facebook and interview joe bloggs in the main street of Pleasantville.

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A Smidgen of Irreverence Pt.1

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