F111
Are you sleeping with a psychopath?
September 02 2014
Comments
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RHP User
11 years ago
then yes
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RHP User
11 years ago
as I have only had 2 relationships, the rest have all pretty much been ONS. I can't deal with too much flattery so nobody would get past the first stage with me before I have had enough.
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yankmychain56
11 years ago
I must be psycho in the extreme!
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RHP User
11 years ago
That covers most of 1-10, in their own writing
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RHP User
11 years ago
I had a bad habit of feeling sorry for guys- this taught me not to. The only way to get out if it was months of planning silently to unentangle my world by getting a restraining order, change my address, any contact details, social circle and name. I spent 3 years stressed that he would somehow locate me. Thank goodness i recognised patterns and inconsistencies earlyish on - I didn't live with him or have any children with him. That would make it even more difficult- it is really important to identify this behaviour before it overtakes your life. It is real. 👾 Xxviolet
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him_and_me
11 years ago
Quoting 'Violetincredible' I had a bad habit of feeling sorry for guys- this taught me not to. The only way to get out if it was months of planning silently to unentangle my world by getting a restraining order, change my address, any contact details, social circle and name. I spent 3 years stressed that he would somehow locate me. Thank goodness i recognised patterns and inconsistencies earlyish on - I didn't live with him or have any children with him. That would make it even more difficult- it is really important to identify this behaviour before it overtakes your life. It is real. 👾 Xxviolet Hugs to you, Vi. It sounds like a hell of an ordeal and I'm glad you got out of it. xx Me
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RHP User
11 years ago
In my job, I have assessed many Sociopaths, Psychopaths, and Narcicissts. It takes great strength to not only break away from them, but to heal from the devastating psychological trauma these entities leave behind. These people have no consciousness, no real emotions, empathy or feelings. They find tremendous joy in hurting, using, abusing and discarding others, for their own selfish reasons. They are pathological liars, completely self-centered, egocentric to extremes and have an aura of self-imposed omnipotence. They distinguish right fron wrong very well; the problem is that they find pleasure in harming and destroying others, until they have gotten everything they wanted, or they get tired and move onto the next victim. This can be a matter of days, weeks, months or even years. A psychopath trains his victims gradually into a form of submission–or acceptance of his deviant, narcassistic behaviour. Eventually, if she doesn’t find the strength to leave him, she’s reduced to a shadow of her healthy personality and existence. - Posted from rhpmobile
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On_Safari
11 years ago
My pet psycho ended up moving into a concrete room with bars and no windows and now his victims are just waiting for his funeral 😇
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On_Safari
11 years ago
Lol my bad. The sex was non-existent but yes I ended up begging for it (nearly!!)
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On_Safari
11 years ago
101 Uses for a Shipping Container 😈
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RHP User
11 years ago
So Indy, what were the signs?
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RHP User
11 years ago
But I'm a little crazy myself lol - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
The psychopath is an experienced & manipulative destructive force, who will say he is in love with you, whilst ensuring that you are experiencing the most romantic, intoxicating time of your life, this isn’t the case at all. Psychopaths are incapable of feeling love, and the only thing they want you for is self-gratification. Below are tips to help you escape from their clutches, or to ensure you are not the next victim. Know your personal boundaries — or set some if you don’t have any — and be aware of a person who is able to make you disregard those boundaries, even if you believe you’re the one doing it. Know yourself well, If you don’t, a psychopath will know you better than you know yourself, as he will suss out yr vulnerabilities, needs, desires & fears in order to use them against you. Avoid rushing into intense new relationships.& sex. Be wary of overly quick, superficial words of love or idealization. Know what you want and need from a relationship, and don’t settle for anything less. Make someone earn your trust…and keep it . Psychopaths are the ultimate cons. # I have used men as an example, for writing purposes only. Females can also be psychopaths, sociopaths or narcissists, though is much less likely. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
So they make out that they are victims essentially? Illness, stalkers, breaking bones, etc. I don't like that sort of victim behaviour so when I meet a person who I think plays the victim I find it very hard not to say........ FFS harden the fuck up! Hopefully I wouldn't fall for someone like that. But who knows.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' So they make out that they are victims essentially? Illness, stalkers, breaking bones, etc. I don't like that sort of victim behaviour so when I meet a person who I think plays the victim I find it very hard not to say........ FFS harden the fuck up! Hopefully I wouldn't fall for someone like that. But who knows. There's a young man from Manly whom I've seen on several dating sites. In all his profiles he says he's newly in remission from cancer.Problem is, his profile has said that for a few years now, but it even sent up a red flag the first time I read it.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Mr Lector at your service :-0 Cianti and Flava beans all round . On a serious note ,,,, it does make you wonder - Posted from rhpmobile
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Playful2looking
11 years ago
There is few girls around like this as well... but whats the point can we get them to wear dog tags or something so we can cut to it quicker..find the one who's traits u can live with i guess. by the way regular garden types kill to especially if they do point ten and you still reject them
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RHP User
11 years ago
Now I know the signs I can see right through you. You haven't broken your willy at all, that thing is going to spring up the minute you move your hand away. You can fool me, Sir! :P
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RHP User
11 years ago
Oh bollocks. I mean you can't fool me.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Didn't think you could see them :-p All wheels no canon :-) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Makes for a definitely scary read & I'm sure that many off us have come across the odd ex with some of the 1-10 traits or signs of your regular garden variety la-la psycho! What I find a bit more disturbing is the Huffington Posts wording.., Are Psycho's as described & outlined by the Huff solely male.. "He, his he'll, him, !..?? I'm sure that I'm not alone in saying that I've come across a few psycho'ette or "bunny boilers" over the years.. And yes, I agree with Spanglishfun, they're fewer & far between but all the more scary when you realise you've just met one... !! As the expression goes, once bitten... Twice run like hell...
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Paradisepair
11 years ago
I was young. The sex was great, one good outcome he helped me get over a few hang ups and when I finally found the network to help me break free I knew exactly what I would and wouldn't stand for. I imagine he's dead by now, because he was frikking annoying.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Gee, I'd for once love to be able to see a 'balanced' article when it comes to generalisation like this--- you know what I read through the whole of this...???? He, he, he, HE does, HE did, HE goes, HE will...... *sigh* YEEEES, I did notice the cheeky "little" caveat at the end with the asterisk, but after being bombarded with a "hail of HE'S", t'would seem the insinuation is complete... (Thanks Huff Po- you've just cemented why I REFUSE to watch TV or read your jack-off sheets of toilet paper.) As a famous comedian once said, "I don't create the stereotypes, I just observe them".
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RHP User
11 years ago
Taking it all a bit too personally, aren't ya VW?!!! Struck a nerve, it would seem.
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On_Safari
11 years ago
And I believe I covered this topic extensively nearing Xmas last year 😇 as for not falling for one Meeka, (sigh) saying "you had to be there" just doesn't cut it. Not even to yourself. He didn't select easy victims, he chose successful women. His ex wife was financially established, then there was me high earner, the next was a Finance Manager for an airline company and the last was a MP. All friends now none stupid, unintelligent or ill-equipped. They're a different breed of human psychopaths/sociopaths/narcopaths.....
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On_Safari
11 years ago
Have seen some female ones in action too.....regardless of sex they're dangerous and more often without rehabiliation. And that's a fact.
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RHP User
11 years ago
lonely ? Then I guess I keep at arms length with newish peeps :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'VWGolfGTIQIK20Z'He, he, he, HE does, HE did, HE goes, HE will...... *sigh* YEEEES, I did notice the cheeky "little" caveat at the end with the asterisk, ". This one article was specifically aimed at women. There are plenty out there written for the guys, I'm sure. The disclaimer was my own, to prevent reactions like yours, but I should have addressed my forum at the women (and bi/gay guys) here.
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MissBishere
11 years ago
My x to a T! Scary thought. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
... how you came to each of these conclusions .. Was it from personal experience or something else ? Explains alot if from personal experience... Jay..
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RHP User
11 years ago
...they have a certain look about them, distinct facial expressions that sets them apart. There is a soulless look about them. The eyes do not show rage. They don't show hatred. They have absolutely no emotion connected to them at all. There is a complete lack of animation, a complete lack of any type of movement from the bottom of the nose to the end of the chin. This is not simply the face of an emotionless person -many people do not show a great deal of feeling but the face of a psychopath goes above and beyond that. You will see a quizzical gaze of which there will be an intensity of hatred that cannot be mistaken for anything but pure hostility. There is also a look of captivating, disarming charm. The eyes have a quality where they actually appear to be twinkling. The difference is the eyes will be squinting in the midst of a forced smile. It is physically impossible to create a genuine smile with squinted eyes. At some point an expression of evil will appear across this persons face identifying the true nature of the person in question. This one is not too easy too detect on sight unless you know what you're looking for, however it is more noticeable in photos.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Jay_Me' ... how you came to each of these conclusions .. Was it from personal experience or something else ? Explains alot if from personal experience... Jay.. *has coughing fit* Why don't you ask journalist and blogger Kiri Blakeley, who wrote this article which was published in the Huffington Post?
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RHP User
11 years ago
That made my night.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'KiwiBred' ...they have a certain look about them, distinct facial expressions that sets them apart. There is a soulless look about them. The eyes do not show rage. They don't show hatred. They have absolutely no emotion connected to them at all. There is a complete lack of animation, a complete lack of any type of movement from the bottom of the nose to the end of the chin. This is not simply the face of an emotionless person -many people do not show a great deal of feeling but the face of a psychopath goes above and beyond that. You will see a quizzical gaze of which there will be an intensity of hatred that cannot be mistaken for anything but pure hostility. There is also a look of captivating, disarming charm. The eyes have a quality where they actually appear to be twinkling. The difference is the eyes will be squinting in the midst of a forced smile. It is physically impossible to create a genuine smile with squinted eyes. At some point an expression of evil will appear across this persons face identifying the true nature of the person in question. This one is not too easy too detect on sight unless you know what you're looking for, however it is more noticeable in photos. I don't agree with eyes not showing rage, however I've learned that anger in psychopaths tends to be short--lived. There is an obvious lack of nervousness though, as they feel they will always win in any situation. So true about the smiling, a psychopath in the beginning is usually engaging, lovely, vibrant, but their smile never reaches their eyes. A very big giveaway to me. Another one for me personally: when a person laughs out loud (in the "crying with laughter" kind of way), but instead of closing their eyes they keep looking at you. Creepy.
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On_Safari
11 years ago
They smile with their mouths but it never rraches the eyes. They have a distinctively reptilian gaze it's been called. They mimic emotion. The only real emotion they feel is rage and their feeling of "love" comes solely from hetting what they want be it physical, material or having their wants met even at your expense. A trust psychopath exhibits most if not ALL 10 traits of the psychopathy checklist. They display atleast half of them by age 7. Ultimately these people have an under developed area of the brain governing emotion, they can't empathise, they can fake it but they can't truly grasp putting themselvesin someone else's shoes or truly admitting there fault/part in any wrong doing. There are no support networks for people who've suffered at the hands of one, unless like the girls and I did; we found each other, strength and understanding. Unless you've been through it no one else gets it. Kinda like battered spouses, adult survivors of sexual abuse and a myriad of other fckd up things we do to each other. Mankinds propensity for cruelty to each other ismimd numbing. But I'm not dead yet. Lol next topic 😎 ~ Indy
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On_Safari
11 years ago
Aaaarrrrghhhh!!!
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'I_N_D_A_G_I_N_E' Aaaarrrrghhhh!!! Was that you feeling rage?
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On_Safari
11 years ago
That's about as psycho as I get.....kinda deflating really. 😂
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madotara69
11 years ago
I reckon they camouflage themselves in the surrounding environment, mimicking what looks and appears the brightest of colour, but their eyes when caught of guard are black, lifeless, recessed within the sockets. Mado Mado Tara xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
That came across the wrong way.. What I meant was it a similar experience that caused you to write this... I failed to read where you mentioned it was a extract from the Huffington Post... My bad.. However' surprised me to read where others recognised these signs in their ex's.. I can see how someone could become defensive after such a experience. Seems garden type psychopaths are more common than I ever knew...
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RHP User
11 years ago
Although to clarify, I'm not saying that the eyes do not show rage, I'm saying that rage is not shown in the eyes with that particular facial expression.
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RHP User
11 years ago
1. Flattery like you never heard before !! Or his woman hates her hair hates her ass hates so much about herself its heartbreaking maybe the man is giving positives where the woman has so many negatives !! 2. He is just like you . Did'nt you both meet doing things you loved and had many similar interests to share together from the moment you met !! 3. Pity Plays For good reason in most cases and both sides usually bicker in break ups !! 4. Illnesses and injuries We should never believe anything and question it until we create cracks that we can be satisfied with ! See i told you so !' 5. Great Sex = Date a psycho if you want great sex . Or just masturbate safer . 6. Cracks in the Mask Who's on Crack ? Do they mean a mud mask or a facial beauty mask has the cracks ! 7. Silent Treatment Yes for many many years silent treatment was a sign the fishing was excellent . 8. Triangulation Only way to avoid this is date a fucking loser . 9. Discard Is that before or after you kick him out on the street ? 10. Hoovering His mates have always said hes fucking psycho for wanting that crazy bitch back !! Yes and to sum things up when a once loving relationship crumbles to a nasty tug of war of both partners emotions , broken hearts and communication breakdown its amazing suicide and depression domestic violence cases child custody tug a wars are not through the roof !!! Oh ! Whats that ??? They are !!! Hmmmmm. - Posted from rhpmobile
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On_Safari
11 years ago
Been with one remember...
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RHP User
11 years ago
You all seem to have a strong opinion on the matter, without any scientific proof you can't simply label someone a psychopath based from 1-10 "facts" I'm sure everyone has days where they don't really give a stuff about anyone specifically and they're just trying to keep to themselves. I'm sure I see people like this everyday.. I grew up without much(not looking for sympathy, never have) and have been told most of my life that even though I'm a very funny and witty person constantly trying to make others genuinly happy (other smiles make me smile) I can also come across as abrubt and rude. Maybe I'm a psycho? I know I definitely don't have fully developed emotions.. I feel it everyday but I'm still proud of who I am as a person deep down and what I've done in my short life. I'm just trying to point out, maybe some people here have scared themselves a bit! Theres a major difference between a psychopath and a poor human being with low self-esteem and self-worth
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Tall74nHard9
11 years ago
Quoting 'I_N_D_A_G_I_N_E' Aaaarrrrghhhh!!! don't look at blaming the tool ... it is the mind and fingers at work with the typo's ... Rage indeed .... Tall
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'CatchHim' You all seem to have a strong opinion on the matter, without any scientific proof you can't simply label someone a psychopath based from 1-10 "facts" Not facts, just signs to look out for. It is not stated this list is the only, nor absolute, truth. I'm sure everyone has days where they don't really give a stuff about anyone specifically and they're just trying to keep to themselves. I'm sure I see people like this everyday.. This is not one of the signs mentioned at all. I'm a very funny and witty person constantly trying to make others genuinly happy (other smiles make me smile) I can also come across as abrubt and rude. Sounds like me. Again, being abrupt or rude is not one of the signs and I think they are actually signs of saying what you really think, rather than playing games. Maybe I'm a psycho? I know I definitely don't have fully developed emotions.. Theres a major difference between a psychopath and a poor human being with low self-esteem and self-worthPsychopaths actually have very high self-esteem as the original post says. Some men here seem to have taken this rather personally I think, mainly because they focused on only a few parts of the entire post. Do any of you recognise yourselves in all ten signs? Even if so, not to worry. If you were actual psychopaths you would laugh them all off and think you were so much smarter than that. It's the people who haven't responded I'm worried about.
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On_Safari
11 years ago
We're not talking normal ole everyday "off" days or assholes. Not raining on your parade just sayin'. Mine was diagnosed psycho and yup refused to believe it lol. It was only a week ago we finally found out he was molesting hos then 10yo stepdaughter. He raped my friends 17yo daughter and I found other women he'd date raped or assaulted on worksites. Rape is not one of the charges he went to prison over....again no one here is being OTT in relating their experiences. It's all an opportunity for education. Hell he might even be here reading about it since he uses sites like these to hunt for prey.....😎
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RHP User
11 years ago
Mirror,mirror on the wall........
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RHP User
11 years ago
Never ever thought about it like that. - Posted from rhpmobile
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madotara69
11 years ago
I know this is directed at the womens experiences, though my experience was from much the same sort of person, he is/was a paedophile. He was married, had a kid and for years prayed upon many young boys, got away with it for a long time because he displayed all what Pink Lotus posted and much more. Even after he had been accused of his behaviour, he still for a long time managed to convince parents he was innocent. He showed no fear, which made him appear innocent and he was a smooth and manipulative craftsman of peoples feelings, his if any were strange. Hard to comprehend just garden variety, when it comes too this behaviour though, @ Pink Lotus The eyes tell a lot about people, once you have seen into them first hand, something we never forget and something we can not mistake for others. There is a darkness hidden within all the confidence projected. Not the easiest thing to explain either. Some things one can only be shown and can't be told.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Thanks for pointing it out... there was something stuck in my craw about this post and I didnt quite know what it was.. Now I do.. it's depressing no matter how you read into it.. I dont know any psychopaths and I dont care to want to, garden variety or not. Nothing happy about this at all..
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6exxy
11 years ago
Ha ha ha to funny........I was 😷
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RHP User
11 years ago
I appreciated Spanglish Fun comments. It is so difficult to recover from the psychological damage. It is soul destroying. What they do is incredibly cruel. It has been just over 2 years for me since I was discarded. I have been on this site a couple times this year to try and overcome my fear of being with a guy again (2 years without any intimacy is no fun) But I get scared..actually at times I feel petrified/nervous and delete my profile. I think this is a record this time round I have gone over 36 hrs..close to 48hrs. Its very hard I think for those that have not experienced/lack knowledge on this form of toxicity. It's not like a normal breakup. I am a very vivacious person and no one would know the hell going on inside of me. Only close freinds! Thankyou for reading my message! I so want to over this! :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Ill admit to number 5 lol
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RHP User
11 years ago
After reading this .. I've just realised I may have been involved with two in the last year ! One was actually a guy who I'd introduced to this site initially after telling him I didn't want him as he was married , a lot younger & with a child . We later ended up in a fwb / dating type arrangement which I can only describe as unsettling & thankfully I managed to terminate our arrangement before it went any further as I could clearly see their behaviour wasn't right myself & thankfully .. he moved on to another younger girl on this site . Second one wow same as the previous one ! All these behaviours very descriptive of his & this is the man i just come out of nearly a year long relationship with . I'm shocked after the first experience mentioned that , i never picked up immediately on the same behavioural pattern , even though there was slight variations between the two the main behaviours are the same reading this post . Initially ( as second mentioned was also younger ) i put a lot of it down to immaturity but upon reflecting .. these two were spot on for the behaviours mentioned down to every last one of them ! Wow .. just wow . I must be a total nut magnet I'm starting to think :/
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RHP User
11 years ago
Indagine , you may remember the first person in question i mentioned as we had chatted quite a few times on the discussion boards & he was the only person I was with at the time on this site . I used to go under username passion8_1 but , had to delete my profile on this site & many others as he as i found out later on down the track .. is quite well known for hacking women's online accounts & subsequently hacked 5 of mine including fb , hotmail , rhp & 2 others !
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RHP User
11 years ago
we are not all psycos , but , we are all fucked up by a fucked up system . don't let your fear stop you from looking for the human inside of the psycos in your life .
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RHP User
11 years ago
The article makes a lot of gross generalisations. Some psychopaths are capable of emotion on varying levels and often struggle with their feelings. However emotions at the positive end of the spectrum are usually fleeting. The article also implies that psychopaths are highly narcissistic, this isn't always the case. It is important to remember that there are varying degrees of psycopathy. While one persons' psychopathic traits may make them a killer, another's might give them just the edge they need to be an elite fighter pilot or even a fire fighter. I'm not stating that all or even any people in these professions are psychopaths. Just illustrating a point that psychoanalysts have been debating for decades and that is, that there is no definitive or absolute checklist that can prove that a person is on isn't a psychopath. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'tongue79'While one persons' psychopathic traits may make them a killer, another's might give them just the edge they need to be an elite fighter pilot or even a fire fighter. I'm not stating that all or even any people in these professions are psychopaths. Who was suggesting that? Psychopaths can have traits that make them very qualified for certain professions. They tend to be smart, outgoing, engaging, focused, meticulous, etc.There are articles on which professions attract the most psychopaths, but people can find those themselves. Just because a psychopath may make a great neurosurgeon, doesn't mean any surgeon is one.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Pink !!! As described a light shade of red, with mildly leftist political views ,genus dianthus ! Cut in a zigzag with pinking shears !!!and make light repeated taps on a surface like a car engine firing early !!hmmmmmm Interesting ! Lotusland !!! An idylic realm of contentment and self indulgence !! Hmmmm Elemonentry my dear watson ?? What we have here could well be a case of pSychopathical tendincies, Take this one to the lab ! Immediately !! HaHaHaHaaaaar!! :-/)) - Posted from rhpmobile
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On_Safari
11 years ago
Sometimes I think I should step back when the psycho topic comes up in the forums and although it's been 4yrs although not "suffering or doubting myself" my life has invariably changed on so many levels. Along with the lives of the other women/girls. I regret having met him but I don't regret what I did to help the others. I regret what it cost me personally but am still hopeful that the worst person to ever come into my life may eventually bring (through the direction life has taken since) some of the best things in my life. Ferrari901 I tried to message you after reading your post. Can I just say....it does and will get better, your confidence and mojo will come back. A life lived in fear is like a life without love, no life at all. Hold your head high chick, in the words of a beautiful woman in my life: Never a victim, always a fighter. ~ Indy x
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RHP User
11 years ago
Thanks indagine . I'm a pre outgoing confident person always have been .. & have always been the more adventurous type .. I also try not to tar every person with the same brush but .. after these two though , im not so sure as to how I feel about anything anymore . That being said , im certainly not going to let these guys discourage me from meeting other people , hence why i rejoined after everything . The latest one has put me through nearly a year of hell also , but .. im determined not to let what he did .. or the other nasty little psychotic number - rob me of anymore of my life or .. my former self .
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RHP User
11 years ago
This forum was never meant for women to say "Oh, he's too complementary, he must be a psychopath!" It was meant to raise awareness, so men and women who recognise most (if not all) of the ten signs in another person will take a step back and observe them a bit more carefully. Sometimes that's all that is needed for things to fall into place.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Just been seeing a woman who was unbelievable to start with but then started doing my head in. One by one those boxes (above) were ticked. She's a freaking psycho!!!... Argghhhhh. Ok, ok good idea with the "Complete no contact" thing and I'm already doing that. But... we move in similar social circles... then what? Avoidance I guess.. warn friends or let them suffer too? Will deal somehow. At least I have a definition for what it is and can look out in future. Thanks. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
But it was my female boss.... Not only would her eyes become completely dead, but her face would blacken with rage..... After one of her rages she would just switch bsck to her charming charismatic self....as a direct result of her behaviour towards me I had à heart attack in the office Q
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