F56
Emotional investment & scheduling roots.
August 17 2014
Comments
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RHP User
11 years ago
I hear you Meeka...Maybe it is a case of head over heart, or vice versa.... . Rhp is just a sex site, so we hope for a rawnchy , passionate, orgasmatic hot night, but close off our emotions ,expectations or romantic ideals..!! Sure, we don't get hurt, and we font hurt others in the process, but are we also losing our love for humanity..?? Ms C .xx - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
In my experience, when their is emotion, connection. The sex is Amazing. Without that emotion it's just another body function. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Let us be the first of (hopefully) a long line of people that your most prescient comment of "the grand passion" wholeheartedly resonates with. Lasciviousness, dalliances, afternoon delight, rough, urgent, leisurely, tender or not its the spontaneity and imagination of life that should shine through whenever possible. B & l
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RHP User
11 years ago
I want friends with benefits, people whom I share a connection with. Anonymous fucks without feeling bore me to death. Not harsh, the cold hard truth in my opinion. I love hard, but I won't do cold. :-P
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RHP User
11 years ago
Why wouldn't you want that!! If I want to be fucked like a porn star i can pull out my dildo and do it to myself!! I have had a man who has picked me up and taken me away for the evening to a spa suite, out for dinner, breakfast the next morning...taken time to attend to my every need. I have another FWB who is the same, passionate and attentive and makes me feel desirable and sexy. Maybe a lot of guys do it on purpose to protect themselves, let's admit , mention the word emotions and they go running!! And I'm sure a lot of females do the same! I put a lot of feeling into everything I do including sex and love it when my partner can do the same..... Remember the movie 9 1/2 weeks!! I want that! Yes it does all seem clinical at times , almost like scheduling work meetings! This is why for the moment I just couldn't be bothered - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I should clarify that I was mainly speaking about the forum comments I read as I don't do the online dating thing, and I have to say that some couples comments really disappoint me too. I know they have frendahip and intimacy at home but the way they speak about meeting people and hook ups leave me cold. Some not all. Wondering if that is because it's the male of the couple writing?
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RHP User
11 years ago
The comments are off-putting to me. It often seems the posters want the on-demand service of a prostitute without paying. At times when men have messaged me in a similar tone I've suggested they visited a prostitute and they've answered 'I don't pay for sex' or 'no way would I visit a hooker' or similar. It's interesting to me that they're happy to treat women like prostitutes but not happy to honour the service by actually paying one. The comments you described Meeka are, in my opinion, completely self-absorbed. They're all about what someone can get, not what they can give. Big red flags for me, because I want to spend my time with someone who gives more than takes. If we're both doing that, it should make for yum. I understand that people have different interests and desires and the key is to find other compatible people, and I'm sure they do. I just won't be one of them :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I think for me, yes I was very like that when I started on here. After all you go from ordinary housewife scrubber, with no sex and no libido to cyber goddess. I got lead poisoning from licking my pencil to fit them all in my dance card. In the first stage of it, to find yourself and your sexuality and what floats your boat. To go where many men dare to go , but as a woman. Its a bit like the sexual outer limits. Meeka, your into swinging. I find swinging interesting but confronting for me and I have only had a little dabble. I find that to impersonal. But others may find intimacy in group sex, its in the moment intimacy. I was looking for just sex but I found some really lovely FWB who I met when I first started and who are still friends, and keep in contact. I have one regular lover and we do find that for that time we get there is contact, yes i do care about my lovers now that i get to know them better. Now when I want to meet up I am pretty sure of what I want, and is not that kid in the candy shop attitude. I was very guarded and also very careful as I have no intention of loving anyone but my husband, and as its such a big love then the sex part does not matter. Hooking up might sound like its just clinical but its not, somewhere in the tangled sheets we can often find one pure second of two of utter delight , bliss and emotion.That moment can charges through two or three or four that find a degree of connection of the body and emotion. I know as sometimes when a man makes love to me I cry and that when sex is a very deep intimate connection, even with a stranger. I guess I am in the moment. It is a learning curve for all of us to drop our guard to let a person in, but then to close the draw bridge again. Some cannot risk intimacy , for all the past and future fears that it can sting like a bitch if you get it wrong.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Link this topic to my profile! Your words are exactly how I feel about rhp at the moment. I had a meet recently and he said those exact words "it's a sex site" that was the moment I knew it would be the last time I would see him, I can barely be bothered explaining why to him.... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
And the ocean is full with the deepest of emotion And a storm inside can make the ocean Emotionally unstable dangerously fatal And when the storm goes by what does it leave us ? Tranquility silence many things broken Being a Man on this ocean When i break shit and just leave it Or hurt people from the words that i have spoken And to fix it and forget it that it in fact ever happened I Would be a boy in a puddle Not a man on the ocean So you dont have to accept or acknowledge anything that you may feel i'm Preach'n Especially from a man emotionally Speak'n But if there is one thing i must do For many many reasons One not for arrogance or a right to free speech or even just brag'n !! Is offer my sincere deepest heart felt sorry Directed at two women One being Meeka and the other Luckdragon. Sorry bout that . - Posted from rhpmobile - Posted from rhpmobile
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Hottie1
11 years ago
I agree with your comment: Quoting Meeka. "...some couples comments really disappoint me too. I know they have frendahip and intimacy at home but the way they speak about meeting people and hook ups leave me cold. Some not all...." I would hope our playmates would say that hubby and I don't just treat them as a hook-up. I invest in people, that's who I am and our playmates get the same investment. Initially hubby would say "we're having sex, why do all the other stuff..." because it's how I like to treat people and be treated in return. Our investment in developing the intimacy beyond the bedroom was evident during the week when hubby had major surgery and spent most of the week in hospital, our FWBs regularly called or texted to see how we were. I get that feeling of wanting that overwhelming passion, I love how powerful it is. A recent lover reminded me how overwhelming it is, that throw against the wall, his tall powerful body controlling mine, I think we were only centimetres from the front door, barely managing a few steps in to shut the door, so as not to frighten the neighbours :) Like others on this site (and other sites similar to this) I have been burnt where the sex, intimacy and effort is ho-hum, I feel like shit when it happened and I will not repeat it for others. I've just got to get smarter at sifting out the duds. As inthekiss has stated, I find ' in the moment intimacy' at swingers parties, if its not there, I don't play. We do go to parties where there are couples who regularly attend, making it easier to know who I can achieve that level of intimacy with. Intimacy etc., is not lost Meeka, on some of us at least. Who doesn't want that grand passion? Mary xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
i very much desire some sort of emotional connection with a lover...and i have fucked things up a few times in the past, due to this desire, with playmates or potential playmates.. i know what i want, but i think my wants can be often misunderstood..i am very much in love with my husband..and i desire no romantic feelings/connection, from any other man..but i do desire to feel a little special (i.e. not just the next set of orifices to get one's rocks off on a rainy day) to me , sharing my body with another person is still a big deal..since i get wonderful and regular sex at home, just a "hook-up" with someone means nothing to me...that's what vibrators are for...what gets me going is that sense of feeling desired, anticipated, wanted.. playing with couples is different...they are a unit, and so are we..i have found that the male part of a couple, so far, has always treated me with respect..suppose they wish their partner to be treated the same way, by my man...so it is a mutual interest by the males, to treat the ladies well.. single guys are different...many appears to have the impression, that playing with a couple means setting a date to meet, preferably as soon as possible...then come around for a quick play and go...they seem to think, that since i have a husband, and i want to be with two guys..i must be a cock hungry little nymph, and i just want to get a good banging..and there's no need for any kind of effort or connection...they are just the extra stunt cock for the night, and that's that.. that is not so, in my case anyway...the high i am chasing is a mental one as much as it is physical...the build up, the flirting...the display of willingness to actually put a little effort into having me..is all part of it in my eyes..i need all those things, to want to let my guard down with a man...to be able to trust him..i love kinky, animalistic, passionate sex for hours on end...and i do enjoy being that horny nymph...but i have to feel safe to be able to let my hair down...and if i can't do that, what's the point in playing?having some cold, mechanical encounter...nahthe way i see it...if i am going to eat out, i don't want some cheap take away... each to their own though...everyone wants something different from here...it is just the matter of connecting with people who want the same...
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RHP User
11 years ago
Men use love to get sex.... Women use sex to get love.... I just stick with coupons to get pizza!!! This quote was brought to you by Facebook :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
And this is why I prefer to meet people at Meet and Greets rather than based solely just on the profile or forum comments. SG
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RHP User
11 years ago
your profile says you have an emotional attachment and your looking for a fwb, how do comments on here leave you cold ? what do you mean ???
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RHP User
11 years ago
Playalone people that make comments like it's only sex, etc as explained above leave me cold... As in opposite to hot and bothered and excited. I am bored by the attitude of the one hit wonder poke and go brigade... It's boring for me. I don't get much sexual satisfaction. My pussy is left as dry as the Sahara desert. Often the sex is ordinary. I don't know.... Do you need me to go on?
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RHP User
11 years ago
I also find some comments are disrespectful and selfish and show no regard for other people. Who the hell would wanna fuck someone like that. You know what I mean? :p
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RHP User
11 years ago
Actually women love to have good sex. That is why we are all on RHP! Unfortunately men don't know how to provide it. ⊂(◉‿◉)つ Drum roll .......... Boom tish! Lol.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Or do I mean phallus? I think its bulldust that women are all looking for LURVE! Women want some hard core good banging sex, lust, pussy twinges galore.... Who doesn't? But I need more than just being pencilled into someone's diary. I need some more foreplay, as in flirting and seduction. I want someone to literally charm the pants off me. Oh yeah bebe! maybe women need to okay harder to het so that the chase becomes more exciting?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Sorry I was over excited. Let me rephrase that last sentence. maybe women need to play harder to get so that the chase becomes more exciting?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Have mentioned to me that I don't need emotion when having sex, as I have it at home........... While yes, when I go to the club by myself or with a girlfriend, I look at it as a release of stress, a way of escaping life's dramas and just loosing myself in the mindlessness, however more often than not, you don't always get to that level and I have enjoyed the spa and seeing regulars more than anything........... I find that I prefer to have my FWB with me or one of my well known FBs. I enjoy the history, I enjoy being able to care more for the persons well being than just having sex with them...... I want the friendship, the long conversations and yes the added bonus of being able to open up in all ways....... I have my man at home and sometimes with me when I'm lucky, however he is not the only person that I enjoys being emotional with.
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RHP User
11 years ago
fuck you are funny lol, sorry to lol but i am only trying to get what you are saying. MY profile has no photo because thats my choice there is more to person than looks. I find i can tell if you have passion or not by looking into your eyes, If the eyes show it then so do i. there are a couple of regulars on here that show it in there profile pics and one i have started to talk with. Thats why i do not have a type good things come in all shapes and sizes.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I think those that know me now, or have seen my posts, know that I can't see anything as 'just sex'... I invest emotion and I need to get to know someone and feel a 'specialness' (that's the only word that comes to mind at the moment) before I can become physically involved. As OP says, and many agree... It does seem to me that it's nothing without the 'connection, the feelings, the emotion and the (as said) 'Specialness'. Personally, starting with a night out for dinner, with the conversation, touching, laughing, then taking the night to be unrushed and available to explore each other, then finishing with breakfast together is what I have always preferred, regardless of the person or situation.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Ladies and Gentlemen may i say , i am not one to piss in my own pockets however i do not wear water proof pants for nothing !! For those trapped in a world of do 's and donts ! Please be my guest as you will find what a man as myself can offer ? And that is choice ! Opportunity !excitement ! Chance ! The rest is simply up to you :-)) Regards always Bigocean . - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Maybe your looking in the wrong places?? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
It was formed some 10 yeas ago as a SWINGERS site here in WA. It appears in the last 3 years it is becoming less and less of this and more a dating sex site. If you want a relationship then WHY are you on here?? as it sounds like most of you singles do, in particular the woman. (Don't say you don't. as most of you wine about being hurt all the time - even tho they are an FWB) Personally I do not understand why you invest so much time on here looking to be swept off your feet and so on. It is percieved as a sex site whether you like it or not. Expectations ??
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RHP User
11 years ago
Inspirit......... I don't look on here and never really have to be honest, and I think random hookups are boring and I have always said so. So shoot me, I prefer good sex over mundane sex. That is my right. And I have found quite a few relationships on here too actually. Guess I am just lucky, eh?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'inspirit' It was formed some 10 yeas ago as a SWINGERS site here in WA. It appears in the last 3 years it is becoming less and less of this and more a dating sex site. If you want a relationship then WHY are you on here?? as it sounds like most of you singles do, in particular the woman. (Don't say you don't. as most of you wine about being hurt all the time - even tho they are an FWB) Personally I do not understand why you invest so much time on here looking to be swept off your feet and so on. It is percieved as a sex site whether you like it or not. Expectations ?? I want more than NSA/ONS, I want a few strings and if it develops into something else then I'm open to that. Why here?Because there are some men who want the same as me and those that don't, well I've found are a lot more transparent than the traditional dating sites. Sure, you get the men that will say what they think you want to hear to get into your pants but I think most are honest about their intentions and those that aren't generally aren't that hard to figure out.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'inspirit' It was formed some 10 yeas ago as a SWINGERS site here in WA. It appears in the last 3 years it is becoming less and less of this and more a dating sex site. If you want a relationship then WHY are you on here?? as it sounds like most of you singles do, in particular the woman. (Don't say you don't. as most of you wine about being hurt all the time - even tho they are an FWB) Personally I do not understand why you invest so much time on here looking to be swept off your feet and so on. It is percieved as a sex site whether you like it or not. Expectations ?? I expect good sex from guys who say they can provide it. I joined here because on conventional dating sites, I was constantly being hit on for sex and nothing more anyway so I figured I would cut the bullshit. From my experience here, I can hardly expect it from a blow and go/ONS/FB/NSA either which is why I am seeking a bit more than a 5 minute wonder who thinks he is god's gift in bed.
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Smilingwithfun
11 years ago
I am a grey ghost as ive had at least 6 pics rejected. Perhaps they will let me have a pic of the Phantom, I will submit it tomorrow. RHP may have started as a swingers site but as in all things in life its journey has morphed. It is what you what it to be. I enjoy the openness of conversation. We all are here for our reasons, let us enjoy our differing reasons.
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RHP User
11 years ago
You say on your profile you are looking for a match, someone with easy faithfulness....no mention of swinging. I have no idea what RHP was when it first began....I do know that RHP had 2 sites, the other being RHP Dating. At some stage, they merged the two together . It seems many of the couples, swingers & men are the ones who have stayed in the past with their "Its just sex" mentality. The rest have moved with the times and appreciate a tad more finesse...personally, I see nothing wrong with wanting more than just being a "cum dump".
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RHP User
11 years ago
Some of the FWB scenarios that have been mentioned on these forums in my mind borderline in extremely close proximity to what I would define as a relationship.... Except the monogamy and commitment to move it toward something of a fairytale. But I also acknowledge that these liaisons are subjective and very much open to an individual perspective.... But the common problem that I personally see; is that there is no expectation of the ladies to be held accountable for the emotional investment they seem to make without discussion with their FWB. I'm not saying they invest consciously and make that investment intentional.....shit happens....we've all woken up at some point to see that we are more involved with our FWB than we otherwise should have. But... What I am saying is that they become invested and then feel hard done by IF those feelings aren't reciprocated as they'd desire and when they'd desire; but then proceed to blame the man for not manning the fuck up..... So I'm with Inspirit in saying you can't have your pie and eat it too, no matter how much you would like it. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I get my emotional connection, my deep love and lust from my husband……..for ME I am just looking for physical, for a fun night out, for some flirting, some "newness" a lusty encounter……NOTHING else . For singles this might be clinical…..but for me it is sexy!
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RHP User
11 years ago
The mans role in all of this which I do apologise for. Which I will concede leaves just as much to be said regarding his actions that facilitate and encourage a breeding ground for such emotional investment... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Surely you guys have twigged to the fact that there are many different types looking for many different things, for some it is just sex, some want more, so what. It is a sexy site. Why sites like rhp have more appeal than oasis, pof et al is the sexual openness, and that is the trick, don't bullshit ! Especially to yourself, if you want more than sex masquerading as a nsa type with a hottie who just wants a fb is a ticket to disappointment. Make better choices people, don't whine about others.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Sorry? I just read a comment you made on another thread how 90% of men you have met through RHP have been and I quote "useless in bed" so what are you saying you are happy with bad sex? Good looking blokes that you just want to use as a dildo?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Somewhat I guess…..I enjoy the lead up, dressing up, meeting them , the kissing and the newness …..the naughty nature of pure sex with a stranger ( orchestrated) ………..Most men off here that I meet like that, won't make me cum….my comment in the other thread was about them being lazy or too much in a hurry to get off …..I also said I wasn't complaining :) I have my desires here, and I meet them, I enjoy the site and the people we meet. ……their prowess is often a bit of a let down…however the general night is always fun and a great time for us. This site is PURELY about sex for me, nothing else. I know many others who use it as that too…………in my opinion is it horses for courses here…..whatever floats your boat, make it work for you. I would not meet with a guy who is after a relationship or something bigger…and I am sure he would not be interested in meeting me…….
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'inspirit' It was formed some 10 yeas ago as a SWINGERS site here in WA. It appears in the last 3 years it is becoming less and less of this and more a dating sex site. If you want a relationship then WHY are you on here?? as it sounds like most of you singles do, in particular the woman. (Don't say you don't. as most of you wine about being hurt all the time - even tho they are an FWB) Personally I do not understand why you invest so much time on here looking to be swept off your feet and so on. It is percieved as a sex site whether you like it or not. Expectations ?? Sorry... I'm not agreeing or disagreeing, I'm just explaining from the point of view of someone who only knows the site that I have recently joined (and hence have no idea of what it was 'supposed' to be about or what was intended 10 years ago). IN FACT, I asked in this Forum when first joining what people thought about my reasons for being here. That is, as I say clearly in my profile, that I ultimately and hopefully would like to find someone with whom something permanent and serious could grow. I had been on Vanilla sites for many years and enjoyed relationships but found that it took ages of chatting, phoning, finally meeting and if all went well, dating for a respectable period before one could touch on the subject of sex and intimacy... Only, after a couple of months had gone by to find that you really weren't compatible in that regard and she had a ton of baggage, generally to do with sex and how the Ex had made it an unpleasant experience and it was their biggest 'hang-up' because of partners cheating, belittling, being selfish etc. I simply thought that, at least here, all that is dealt with presumably, to a point where a lady understands that it is an important part of a 'monogamous relationship' as it is in any other and they are open to, understanding about it and even adventurous. I paid my money and had the decency to ask the opinions of current members what they thought of my reasons for being here and was encouraged when the majority agreed that there were a number of ladies looking for much the same thing I was. That's why my profile is specific and direct. My thoughts are that things change because there is a need for them to change, whether it be for the people who make up the membership or the needs of the times etc. I certainly didn't mean to contribute towards changing or spoiling the ideals upon which the site was originally conceived of. (Getting better people... Only 4 paragraphs, in the unpublished field... )
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Burning_Love' The comments are off-putting to me. It often seems the posters want the on-demand service of a prostitute without paying. At times when men have messaged me in a similar tone I've suggested they visited a prostitute and they've answered 'I don't pay for sex' or 'no way would I visit a hooker' or similar. It's interesting to me that they're happy to treat women like prostitutes but not happy to honour the service by actually paying one. - Posted from rhpmobile Amen sista. I am forever perplexed by the men on this site that assume that because you're attractive and into certain sexual fetishes that you'll automatically want to have sex with them just because they asked. I'm not a free prostitute, I'm a sexual woman with a libido that ONLY gets turned on by chivalry, intelligence, great humour and mutual respect. While I do not expect to be paid, I do expect to be shown a great time - why else would I bother? I want passion and friendship, not love (achieved by aforementioned traits), the blow n go's can just not bother. I can't rock your world if you don't rock mine!
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RHP User
11 years ago
You can still have the busy schedule and mutually connect. I have that said schedule but I also respect the person I meet and can connect emotionally. We can all be friends at the end of the day/night. I'm sure/know RHP has plenty of bed post markers and they are the ones missing out on the emotional connection. Your not going to be friends if you don't have the caring or emotional connection. Im on here to meet new friends. Sometimes it works and sometimes you just never see them again. I'm not running i will be staying around to meet new friends hehehe. R - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Saying "we're not free hookers" is something of an inadvertent inaccuracy.... While we may not exchange monetarily we DO make an exchange.... Women's number one thing is "show me chivalry, passion, awareness, etc..." So in exchange for sex..... Men give their women their desired payment..... While I admit this will be frowned upon by most as it's quite the far reach.... But... When you break it down.....women's want "abc" in order to be in the mood to give "xyz". Currency is different; but the system doesn't change much.... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
DUDE!!!!!! Get with the program will ya! What people want when they say they want an FWB is an ongoing FRIENDSHIP. Which is a type of relationship, yes. Same same but different. An FWB is your Clayton's boyfriend. You know, the boyfriend you have when you are not having a boyfriend. Is there are a danger that sometimes feelings can get more serious? Yes there is, but I prefer to live a little. And you can't live without some risk. Besides I don't want to meet a bunch of strange men week after week for bad sex! This makes no sense to me at all, but admittedly I don't enjoy first dates, and flirting with randoms online. Not my thing but I understand how other people would enjoy that.
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RHP User
11 years ago
What the ? I don't get your last comment. But I bet you are right little whore when you wanna be hey? Any chance you can come over tonight and dress up like a dancing girl and give me a little lap dance. I am in the mood for a hairy bitch in heels
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RHP User
11 years ago
Excuse me Sir_Stir a prostitute is someone who sells her body for money. Two people freely giving their bodies for sex doesn't make one of you a sex worker. And how do you see yourself in this scenario? Pimp Daddy? LMAO!
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RHP User
11 years ago
That's SIR Pimp Daddy :p - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Keeping in context ummmm - I don't winge about not finding a deep connection in here. In fact I have had quite a few. However I do not have expectations. Say all you will - I just had an opinion from an observation. Now back to the knitting.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Oops I hope I haven't offended anybody with my sense of humour.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' Oops I hope I haven't offended anybody with my sense of humour. No more than Stir! Stir: yes you can have your pie and eat it, and I'm gorging myself. *Burp*
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RHP User
11 years ago
..when RHP was recommended to me..as did the friend who recommended it, clearly. After some initial playful exploration I appreciate it's more than that. I'm sure the creators of Facebook would feel the same way about their creation now too.These things evolve, as do I, so I see no point in categorising it as a Sex site oran Adult Dating Site. To me it seems to be both and more. The forums are the biggest part ofwhy I am on here now..they're interesting at times, certainly educational and I see/read the most fascinating people sometimes : )I sway towards the Dating/Relationships potential of this site because that's how I feel at the momentand because I prefer the humanity and the compassion of a proper friendship compared to somethingmore clinical. If it's okay for friends to satisfy each others sexual desires now and again…then great!If it grows into something more than just friendship? Bonus!
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'sir_stir' Saying "we're not free hookers" is something of an inadvertent inaccuracy.... While we may not exchange monetarily we DO make an exchange.... Women's number one thing is "show me chivalry, passion, awareness, etc..." So in exchange for sex..... Men give their women their desired payment..... While I admit this will be frowned upon by most as it's quite the far reach.... But... When you break it down.....women's want "abc" in order to be in the mood to give "xyz". Currency is different; but the system doesn't change much.... - Posted from rhpmobile Women want abc AND xyz.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Must say I like your comment to Meeka. Must be one of the best up front comments I seen for awhile. Such a shame your so far away for me to attempt to peruse
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RHP User
11 years ago
You're such a pig!! Xx :p - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Lol apologising for your humour??? Bahahaha - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
We are all different and seeking different things. So long as you find what you are looking for (and it is consensual) it is all good. If more people managed it, the world would be a happier place. As for the perception that all or most men are of the wham/bam type - this is hardly surprising if you understand the differing biological imperatives between men and women when it comes to reproduction.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I find the point of your frustrations quite interesting Meeka. Not only are Men and women different as a base, men and women are all different within themselves. Hence why we search for people that make us happy. I've had friends that made me happy for a few hours and others that have brought happiness over many months and years. What annoys me is the expectations, the lack of respect for individuality, and failure to acknowledge that every person you meets is an opportunity to further yourself as a human being. Yes selfish lovers and disrespectful people have a role to play in your life. We've all had them. I've done blow n go, FWB, girlfriends and met some great people and others that I wouldn't want to meet again. Every one of them have been a part of getting me to this part of my life. I personally wouldn't come on here and bleat about how it's not fair, cause I'm responsible for my life and outcomes. I take nothing for granted and appreciate everything. Way to busy with life to have it any other way - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Classic guys 'go to guide' movie Tucker Max's 'I hope they serve beer in hell' Anyways a line in that movie where the girl says to Drew 'just because your ex cheated on you doesn't make women hard wired to cheat'....'she's only indicative of herself not of all women...unless you get over this childish notion your life will continue to resemble the bucket of shit it currently is' (summarised direct quote for Tucker Max purists) Btw I'm only joking about the guys 'go to guide'...but great movie....better than The Hangover IMHO, but not as good as Bridesmaids....sorry I digress. :) Meeka I hope you can see my point - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Thanks :) I often am too open, sometimes need to learn to filter what I say ! X - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I am merely making an observation and asking a question. I am not complaining as I don't look for lovers from the RHP data base so I am not experiencing any frustrations. ;-) Another observation I have made is women, including the lovely luscious DeliciousCurves, speaking about how unsatisfactory the sex is in this hook up culture that we have. So I am not taking about having relationships, and love and deep emotions.... I am talking about connecting to people on a deeper level whether that be for an hour, a month or years for the simple reason that I WANT GOOD SEX! I am not turned on by being somebody's option for the night or being pencilled in their diary. Let's make a commitment that while we know each other we are going to fuck hard and fuck well. I don't know. I think that is reasonable. :p
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RHP User
11 years ago
The one hit wonder blow n go brigade are usually pretty selfishness lovers and bad in bed. I think most women complain about the wham bam mentality because the sex was so atrocious. All the effort a women goes through.... The emailing, the talking, the waxing, the shaving, the make up, doing the hair, getting all dressed up and all we get is a disappointing poke. Wham bam and good riddance I say. Maybe these sorts of blokes keep doing the wham bam routine because they never get an invite back? Perhaps. :P
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madotara69
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' I am merely making an observation and asking a question. I am not complaining as I don't look for lovers from the RHP data base so I am not experiencing any frustrations. ;-) Another observation I have made is women, including the lovely luscious DeliciousCurves, speaking about how unsatisfactory the sex is in this hook up culture that we have. So I am not taking about having relationships, and love and deep emotions.... I am talking about connecting to people on a deeper level whether that be for an hour, a month or years for the simple reason that I WANT GOOD SEX! I am not turned on by being somebody's option for the night or being pencilled in their diary. Let's make a commitment that while we know each other we are going to fuck hard and fuck well. I don't know. I think that is reasonable. :p Sounds like our wedding vows. Mado Tara xx
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MsJonesy
11 years ago
Personally I think you have nailed it on the head Meeka. That word you use... 'commitment'.... is such a scary word to others. 'Commitment' doesn't = 'forever' folks. Look it up in the dictionary... I can't find one definition that links them, and they are not synonyms. Commitment can be forever or it can be fleeting. People should be able to come to an agreement that theybothwill do their damndest to rock each other's world every time they fuck. That to me is a commitment to fabulous sex, one which does not have a timeframe any longer than the mutual desire to lust after each other. I will have a slice of that any day because I am not after meaningless sex. I'm not after one off encounters which leave me dissatisfied and emotionally cold. I prefer a man/men with whom I have formed a connection, where the lust takes over and we create a storm of passion which leaves us panting and muttering fuck that was a great shag. If it is wrapped up in the context of a friendship then I am even happier.
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RHP User
11 years ago
...for most men, any sex is good sex ? You can't blame the poor things for not knowing any better, they don't need to engage their brains to orgasm so how can they be expected to be able to tell it's only sub-par for their partner? xx Sarah
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RHP User
11 years ago
Spot the troll ! Nice try dear but I'm not playing. 😜
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RHP User
11 years ago
That is interesting comment. Men don't need to engage their brain to orgasm, but that implies that women do. Do we? We should all have a mentor program and be teamed up with an older person to learn what good sex is about when we hit 18. I know some cultures/tribes do that. We would all be better off.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' That is interesting comment. Men don't need to engage their brain to orgasm, but that implies that women do. Do we? We should all have a mentor program and be teamed up with an older person to learn what good sex is about when we hit 18. I know some cultures/tribes do that. We would all be better off. But I've had sub-par sex with older people who needed direction too. Pass. xx Sarah
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RHP User
11 years ago
And I must say I had no idea what to expect when I joined thia site as a single gal. I was very lucky the first two guys I met were very respectful and I have the most amazing meetings with them. And I still consider both of these guys as good friends. You may ask what my point is...well it is that they both gave me hope that there is genuine, non blow n go guys on here - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Its a sex site! I absolutely believe in each to their own, so if you are looking for more then thats fine - but i think its important to recognise that it is a sex site. RSVP and all the others exist for those looking for cuddles and hand holding and looking into each others souls. Im not criticising anyone looking for these things! But i am NOT (even the word cuddle makes me a lil sick, tbh ;D) and so, for me, its great that rhp is different. I absolutely love that people can be (and are) so direct on this site about what they are up for and what they are not up for. I make it clear on my page that id prefer someone who can hold a conversation and make me laugh etc but im not about to get upset if others on here arent looking to provide it. Tbh, its frustrating to me how many men on here assume i will want a rship - even though i make clear that i do not. All the gals using rhp to find "more" have contributed to that.... ;) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
even if you want to perceive it as a sex site, I didn't sign up for shit sex. All the other sites you mention are full of guys wanting to get their dicks wet too under the guise of wanting a relationship, except eharmony where I don't think any guys actually exist. I wouldn't care so much if a guy blows and goes as long as he blew my mind when he was with me, but they don't, they don't even try. Tbh, it's frustrating to me how many men on here assume I am up for mundane, mediocre sex and maybe all the gals using rhp that 'just give it up' have contributed to that....;)
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RHP User
11 years ago
I wouldnt know about that...as im not one who "just" gives it up. Quite picky, you see. But then, im not complaining about that.... All this grumbling about shit sex is a little boring tbh! Doesnt do much for me - im here to have some fun and avoid the travails of comex relationships. Ranting about men and their failings is something i can get anywhere - but its not my scene! ;) Ftr, ive only met fantastic, clever, considerate blokes on here. They do exist. Perhaps just be a little pickier, ladies...? And, no one likes a whinger! ;) Go your hardest X - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
*complex - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
We do have some one night playfriends that we meet in nightclubs etc, but really even those, there still needs lust, flirty looks and body movements, touching eye contact playfullness by all three of us toward each other, truthfulness by all and being open about what each other wants....sounds a long list but really all the above can happen in a minute...;))..with the right girl... we are totally in love and are happy just being us, we satisfy each other in basically everything, we are oppersites but in lots of things we like the same like threesomes, I love the difference between men and women, love having both at once...and my partner is a manwhore, who loves dirty talk, looks like a bad boy and loves women especially two women, it is one of the main reasons we are in love....our playfriends, weather one night, or long time friend will tell you that we make her feel welcome, part of us, it turns us on if she is in pleasure land and can't move her legs, we help her feels safe, not left out in any way, so she can honestly say what she is looking for, we both are open to all conversation and say the truth about almost anything, I and her if we meet from here or other sites text, talk on the phone, get to know each other, (hopefully not tooooo long), and we meet out usually but a lot by the time they want to meet feel safe enough to come to our place...my partner messages as well as me, we see what each other is saying etc...communicate and trust is what we have going for us, having threesomes doesn't add the 'spark', having threesomes, foursomes etc, having playfriends is just a part of our lives and never take someone who we get naked and dirty with for granted. As for short bad sex,,well it has happened that a new 'friend' wants to go to sleep or go home early, so we give lots and lots of kisses and talk and say goodnight, I usually text and say thank you for the beautiful night then hit the clubs in the city or valley and dance people watch flirt with each other or maybe that mmmm hopefully bi girl over there.....I always text asking how our friends are, we become friends ....I don't have to have a connection with play friends at first but have to like something about them personality or her look or just a phyical feature, but eventually it has to be the girly emotional connection or we just don't play with her anymore:) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Sex is far better with an emotional connetion in my experience. But, my emotions are well looked after and catered for. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being more romantic etc, but there are an absolute plethora of social media, dating and other sites out there designed to help you find exactly that. This clearly isn't one of them. It would be like going to a strip club and then complaining about the kinds of people you found there..
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RHP User
11 years ago
Meeka I definitely had the same type of experience recently.. Talked to someone online great, we seemed to want the same thing; then talked on the phone and it was if he was pencilling me in for a BJ; absolutely no emotion in his voice, barely flirtation or an attempt at seduction? So I said, sorry, not right. Whilst I want intimacy; there is something to be said about minimal effort in order to have it happen.. I'm single, I want sex; but I'm not desperate.
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6exxy
11 years ago
How come I can't see your profile? How can one schedule a moment Find s shooting star Breathe life into a soul Listen to another heart Taste delicious life 💋
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RHP User
11 years ago
Hi Ladies and Gents.I am one to think that there must be emotion and a connection when having sex it makes it much better and healthier.The only problem is i am based in Brisbane and it seems that all the women there are just on the site to look and chat on line and don't bother meeting anyone or it could just be me maybe. because i have had no luck i have women that just won't to chat online instead of meeting up god the worst thing that could happen is you don't like what you see or hear and you get a free coffee out of it but maybe you find out that the person could be perfect for you but most are to shallow to even try . How are you meant to find out about a person on a profile or a photo it is a joke. I would give my right arm to find a lovely lady that i could take out on dates and have fun with and if we both decide that we are meant to be together so be it or not.
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RHP User
11 years ago
First and foremost, I do believe this is a sex site. Its a site that removes "the dance" that I think would be on sites such as RSVP etc.....To get to the sex part Wouldn't a persons profile list their requirements ?? If you want to be wined and dined, receive flowers, experience "the thrill of the chase".....Put it in your profile. You don't want the complications of a full on relationship.......Put it in your profile. Want a FWB, to occasionally hang out with, go out to dinner with and have great sex with so "its not boring" ....Put it in your profile It cannot be that hard. Its done with age range , body type, height etc, and many a time I have read " Why do people outside my age range contact me"? OR "why do I get messages from people that dont match what I'm looking for" Is being done already in some areas, why not all?? For mine, once you have a conformance to requirements, you have quality. I know if I my requirements are for a pair of shoes size 12, in black..I'm not going to buy a pair of size 10, in yellow Otherwise i would suffer buyers remorse................... lots of times
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'itstime37' First and foremost, I do believe this is a sex site. Its a site that removes "the dance" that I think would be on sites such as RSVP etc.....To get to the sex part It removes the dance? Well I am disappointed to read that, as the dance is such delicious fun and quite frankly I need it to get me in the mood. The flirtation and seduction when done well, is so super hot. Otherwise I am just arranging for a bloke to come around and stick his dick in me, sorry itstime, that just does nothing for me. I would rather masturbate then read a good book if I am being honest. And yes I should probably look at sex as a bit of exercise and something to relieve the pressure, you know, a bit like going to the gym or something. As a single woman I can go to the swingers clubs for that, I wouldn't bother with meeting blokes from RHP for one on one sex when it was just to scratch an itch. Too many variables and not a good use of my time. But that is just me.
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RHP User
11 years ago
The "dance" is a requirement of yours. Its not shared by everyone on here. Not saying its right or wrong. Just that if your dance card gets punched you will have quality. Does that really disappoint you?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Meeka Firstly I do prefer a connection it adds to the excitement :-) I have met a special lady off here that I have a special connection with from a dirty message to a good morning message that makes me smile it makes the build up better for the times we meet I have met pplof other sites that I have a connection with but every person is different ;-) Also I have met up with ppl for 1 time meets but they serve a perpouse for me as much as I do for them and I always give 100percent . But each to their own but as long as we all enjoy ourselves that is the main thing and I am always honest - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I am new here. And I am 'a single that has been badly hurt in the past and don't want to get hurt again'....but I am learning more about love and friendship, respect and genuineness through RHP than I ever have anywhere else...I recently found myself saying 'We are just sex!' to an absolutely awesome RHP member that I have been playing with, and realised that it is something I say a lot!!! To protect myself...and to not scare him away...but I realised that I genuinely care for him (and others that I have met) and it is ok to feel that way without all the 'labels' that society makes us put on everything. I don't want a ring, I thoroughly enjoy being single at this time in my life....but I also enjoy companionship, sex! Yes it's true SEX!!! And spending time with someone who is on the same wave length as me....and that is fine with me....
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RHP User
11 years ago
Read the book Sex at Dawn, sex is more than ok, it's natural.
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RHP User
11 years ago
...for the tip 50zcool...will check it out :)
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