M39

Girls - What attracts you to a guy?

December 01 2009

Obviously you have to be physically attracted to a guy to some extent, but once you start talking to someone what is it that keeps you interested? I keep hearing about this 'confidence' thing, well how does a guy act confident?I seemed to get a fair bit of attention when I was with my ex, but then I guess that was because I was happy with myself and in my relationship, so I had the 'aura of confidence'. How do I recreate this? Do I pay girls no attention and hope that they're attracted to me because they find me handsome but also because I'm not paying them any attention and this annoys them?I am always polite in the company of a woman, and always ask questions about them, but to be honest, partly to do with my lack of experience around girls my age (all boys school) and partly to do with my lack of confidence I don't seem to be able to make much headway. My ex confronted me and told me how she felt when I was oblivious to it, two girls slipped under my radar when I was younger, another I turned down then asked out a year later (good going Einstein), and well I asked that one girl out and hopefully the reason she gave me for not wanting to go out was legit and not just to ease rejection. I dont think the fact I look so young helps me either. I don't have some kinda brooding intensity, smouldering good looks, a six pack (working on it starting from tonight, i'm just your regular slim dude). I'm just a polite, and probably too nice, guy.Don't worry I'm not depressed or anything, just trying to learn as much as I can to give myself the best chance possible for meeting girls and taking it to the next stage. I spoke to my ex last night on the phone and told her about our friend I asked out, and she said that she thought it was a strange choice as she's into drugs and stuff and I'm not, and that I should just go out and 'shag about'. How can I get girls to not just think of me as a friend, but as a potential boyfriend too?

Comments

RHP User

16 years ago

Damn she is into drugs!!! Well...lucky your still friends with your ex and she told you about this girls lil secret! Confidence....Being at peace with yourself ...No1. Getting out there....sports, hobbies, gives you the chance to widen diff circles of friends. I hope your going to Mauy Thai this week sweety.. Eye contact...smiling ...conversing with strangers....shop assistants..people at the book store...etc..I can walk into my crn shop looking like a complete dag!...and the girls in there love having a chat to me..I suppose my son's ball of energy cute antics helps too..lololol..He gets way more attention than me! hahhahahahahaahha.... ppsssttt.....lil secret.....I get down to outdoor pub here in town sometimes...Look pretty..I am happy..But seem to get complete knobs with the Auzzie ocker saying....yerrrrr....your cute....pmsl...I even had 1 guy ask to buy a smoke off me..just so he could have an excuse to say hi....WTF...!! Relax babe.....Most of us here would love to find that perfect partner for us.....Like the old saying..When you are looking it wont happen..When your not ...you get heaps of offers...Just get out there and enjoy your life... I am not looking now...And heck I am getting some awesome offers from hotties!! But I am just way too busy atm..sighhhh... kiisses to you my friend xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx sweetpetite41 PS...You going to talk to that girl at the supermarket now??

reply

like
RHP User

16 years ago

Mate. You could play both sides of the field and multiply your chances of a hot date by 10. :p Then sneak up on the lady's cause you can afford to be pretty casual about it once many of your sexual desires are being pandered to.... and of course, therefore you are being natural.. being your charming self.. exuding all the similarities to self confidence.... because the devil may care whether you score from a lady or not.... and you simply sneak up on your herd of gazelle like you are one of them ... .just another gazelle out looking for the best places to forage for ... errr... men... lolz... then strike a killer blow at those gazelles with your sexy Elvis moves when they are at their most vulnerable. :p Law of the jungle bebe. Go get 'em killer. Hugs Gaz

reply

like
RHP User

16 years ago

hi casual...every one has made valid points...confidence comes from within....Be true to yourself be real n natural.and have faith in you....Me thinks you will be ....using a big...??? to fight them off soon enough continue enjoying the roller coaster life of rhp...xoxoxheymumma

reply

like
RHP User

16 years ago

Thanks for the compliments heymumma and trish. Confidence is key apparently, and whilst I can be confident with most things, I don't think women is one of them. It can be quite daunting asking a woman out, and I crossed that barrier last week and I guess I achieved success since initially, she agreed to go out with me. There's always the fear of rejection, I had planned to ask her out for a couple of days but either avoided going out of my way to head to the pub and ask her, or when I got there, held off for 30minutes-an hour before asking for fear of public rejection.Sweet, that girl in IGA that I think is attractive but don't know is 17, so she's 6 years younger than me. Whilst that is not necessarily a bad age, when she is that young it could be seen as pervy on my part, and I don't think her parents/friends would agree with it if we ever did get together, so I don't think I'm going to persue. I went to Muay Thai last night, got absolutely knackered, extremely cardio intense. Now I just have to motivate myself to keep going, and pretty soon I'll have bigger arms, more strength and definition, so that should make me more confident in myself (even though I'm slim) and therefore around women and hopefully more attractive to them. As far as smiling and making chit-chat go, I don't think that's a problem of mine with anyone, I'm extremely easy to talk to and I always try to crack a joke or whatever to lighten things up. I think it's when I find a woman attractive that I start to have doubts in my mind, I'll still act the same way but I'll be very aware of the fact I like her and want to take things further, and that I don't want to get rejected.Gaz, I've had another experience with a guy and it was ok, but that's about it - I definately prefer women based on my three experiences with the same sex.Thanks Trish, but your behind looks tastier than mine, loving the new picture. There's a couple of girls that go Muay Thai, but one's a lesbian (should get on well with her considering my ex is bisexual and now romantically involvedwith a woman) lol, another was there with a boyfriend, or a very well built brother (not going near her lol) and the other two, well, didn't even get to talk to them because we were all too busy training. As for soccer, only guys play that in the team I'm going to join, although If I get back into tennis maybe I'll meet some girls there, that's a sport that both sexes play and can mix together (doubles etc). Failing that, the place I'll meet girls is out at bars I guess, which I maybe go to once every week or two or so.I have made some good friends on here and had some good conversations, so i'm doing alright with my time on here, but I doubt you lovely ladies have the same pattern of thought as the 'women' my age that hang around in bars and clubs do, as you're generally speaking, going to be a lot more mature, and looking for someone to settle down with, again, generally speaking.x

reply

like
RHP User

16 years ago

Just loving that pic, berry berry nice!

reply

like
RHP User

16 years ago

- say no to a woman and mean it- do what he wants to do for himself when he wants to do it and encourage his woman to do the same eg be your own person, don't 'lose' yourself in a couple- stand steady and calm but still be loving in the face of a woman's tantrums- not be scared, not ever, by a woman's emotions- have a vision for his life and go about making it come true- speak and act with clarity and purpose- always challenge himself in life, not too much, but at least a little- really really really know how to make love, not just fuck or have sex, but lose himself completely in the intimacy of lovemakingjust a few thoughts :D

reply

like
RHP User

16 years ago

and I'm a picky bitch. 1. sense of humor 2. intelligence and ability to hold a good conversation.Confidence in himself. 3. a great smile that lights up his face when he see's me. 4. someone who has the ego to match it with me when we are going at it hammer and tongs, sex or fighting. 5. into fitness and has some of the interests I do, so we can do shit together. 6.how he looks is right down towards the bottom... because if he's into fitness like I am, he's gonna look fit and healthy anyway. I have a guy like this at work, and he is exactly the type of guy I want. Just like my Dad.

reply

like
RHP User

16 years ago

Well they have to be easy on the eyes and a great personallity. I love this site, but had my 1st bad experience with a single guy. Won't mention names, but not so cute! & Not that toned either! He obviously likes to controll everything...the simple fact is I DON"T GET CONTROLLED. My husband knows that! Smart man he is my sexy Sam :) Well I didn't give him a front naked shot no comfortable with that...did mention that. He called me a time waster? WTF! For all who really know me on this site really fuckin know that is not the case. If I am uncomfortable it ends. Simple maybe that snds cold, but u have to be cruel to be kind. Okay so if anyone wants to get with me just know, no one controlls me I am happy and free! Some people need to stop the false advertisement or really no themselves before jumping on this site.

reply

like

Girls - What attracts you to a guy?

Comments

Tags

Boards

Forum help