How much excess baggage is to much ?

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  I like to hear peoples story, because I think every-bodies life journey is an adventure in it self.Ok it is not nice to hear the person go on and on about his/her partner and being cheated in life, that's after a while boring. But I like to hear the past, because the past defines us today, and without it and have learned from it we wouldn't be here at this point right now.Also define "DRAMA".

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  It's only guys that don't like drama??? Mate....no one likes drama.....no one wants to hear anyone bash their ex....it's past...the here and now is all that you should be concentrating on...... Just think about how YOU would feel if someone you're interested in spent all night talking about that stuff eh??? They've had their own experiences and really just wanna enjoy their life now...as it is.... Someone very wise once told me of a date they were on where the other party kept on about that stuff. They ended up saying to them "I'm not your counsellor, go and get your shit sorted!!" - Posted from rhpmobile

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  Everyone has baggage no matter how many partners they've had, how old or how young they are. I think there are some people who carry their baggage around and show it off to all they meet. I don't think bringing up the bad stuff from past relationships all the time is all that helpful, relevant or healthy when meeting new people. I think you'll find that the baggage issue goes both ways, women don't like it either. I think learning about someone's past relationships can be a good bonding experience, bringing about the understanding of how they came to be who they are today, their life's journey and the people in it so to speak. But if all the conversations get back to the shitty ex, or if the shitty ex is still there, making life uncomfortable (assuming they're not there as co-parents, i.e. don't have to be in the person's life), that's not a good situation for the new relationship. People need to deal with their shit and move on in my opinion. - Ms Otori

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  I've got a shit load. My fella still likes me and he's had to deal with some of my past issues. Thankfully he has stuck with me and it has made me a lot stronger.Everyone has stuff....its how you deal with it.I'd find it weird if someone didn't share...its part of growing together

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  EVERYONE has baggage, some people's baggage is strewn about the place and you can't help but trip over it whilst others is neatly packed in the hall cupboard. Depending on where you are headed dictates how much you want to be exposed too, but I would certainly prefer to peek in the cupboard when the timing is right than turn an ankle on the first date !- Posted from rhpmobile

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  ..on my life experiences..We all have a story to tell' and at the end of it all, as long as you come outta the haze smiling you got it beat.. It's the extreme's of life experiences that shapes the person you are. As they say.. you get knocked down' you get up again' and usually as a stronger person...Without the bad, you never really know just how good the good can be...

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  A little baggage is ok, just if one goies on and on relentlessly then they haven't learnt to let go and not able to detach from their problems, it can effect any relationships even if it is an fwb.   FWB situation is a perfect escape from all our troubles, pull the shutters down and just focus on having fun in the moment, forgetting all about other baggage or issues, but that is just my attitude on things.   If someone was constantly going on and on and whingeing about exes or personal problems then it can be tiresome and tedious and I would lose interest pretty quickly.

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  Bottom line (and I of course can't speak for the fairer sex though I'd imagine a heart isn't gender-specific):No man even wants to consider someone else nailing his girl; we know it has happened, we accept that of course - but we don't even want to imagine it.I think it is incumbent, even imperative that we all leave our respective pasts just there - in the pastM

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  Mutters how cute...Haven't you noticed on this site guys love hearing about what their girls are up to and even like to watch and join in.As for baggage I remember seeing this on a vanilla site.......... profiles saying not interested if you have baggage...well I thought oops I have some what should I do?.....Eveyone has some just different levels and how it affects the current relationship is the issue.I think the baggqage gets lighter eventually.

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  depends how much they've got and the depth of it.I prefer someone who has a little man bag myself, so my little coin purse can fit in and we can carry it together.Foxy

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  Actually I get turned off a man when he says "I don't like drama"...a fence sitter and passive man - they like to sweep dirt under the carpet and ignore things- little do they know one day the dirt gets built up and needs to be sorted out...YUK!Not the type of man for me...Actually it is fair to say women like an "Assertive man???One who is confidant, is able to speak up with out being cocky, one that can express their feelings, someone who values others and can take action.Foxy

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  RHP User

  13 years ago

  Isnt that something someone else has that we dont want to know about because we have enough of our own ? Pretty hypocritical in a sense.. Dont get me wrong, Im a positive person who cant stand people who try and dump their problems on everybody else.. You can use your 'baggage" in a motivational way to make sure you never go there again..

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