M54
Icebreaker or new messages. Have I adopted the right method?
October 23 2018
Comments
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sw1ng3rz
7 years ago
I’d say as a single male anything you can do to make yourself stand out from the rest is a massive advantage. If you have an awesome opening message type it in your notes, copy and paste! No time and effort and if they don’t reply their loss. If they do, win win for everyone - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
A message like that would get you deleted and/or blocked real quick. If you can't be bothered then either will l 😏 Ms PF
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RHP User
7 years ago
Always use your best material. If you walk into a vanilla Bar and there is a beautiful person you want to talk to would you just walk up and say "Are you interested in talking to me some more" - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
theres nothing wrong with this opener. Good luck - Posted from rhpmobile
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countrytouch82
7 years ago
I tend to write things and ask questions that prove that I have read their particular profile. However many have bugger all in their profile that distinguishes them from other people, apart from height, age etc etc. So then it becomes pretty hard to be original. The line you suggest is just a nice way of leaving the ball in their court, but don't use that as the only message, at least put it at the end of something original, if possible. Perhaps a mention that you are always interested in a non pressured easy catch up like a coffee etc, might help. But even with fully customised, individualised messages, still only one in 10 or 1 in 20 will respond, so yes putting in a lot of effort continually, does get to you when you know pretty much the outcome already. That's when you start getting tempted to simply copy and paste, or you do already. If there's little information in their profile, a copy and paste message can just be a generic extra introduction to yourself and show some more of your character. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
I’d go with a message that proves you’ve read the profile. Not a full blown inquisition into everything they’ve said but perhaps mention something that caught your attention or made you smile or made you think that you matched with that profile. Radio silence is the norm. But a little innovation to your message and hopefully the silence turns into chatter. - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
7 years ago
Everyone is piqued differently. Larger majority are nudged to attention by a nice face pic. Less by an interesting message. But if the initial message exchanges are not on key, crash and burn will be the result. We are fussy fuckers. So nice face ( which you have) and your exploratory message as outlined will give you a fair chance at a crack at the booty. But need to factor in the level of hormones of the monthly cycle, how their day at work played out, if the kids are about and fucking her over or the ex hubby may have laid a heavy number at her feet that week. The valium prescription may be on its last repeat. All factors going against you. If those factors coincide with each other, you will burn on the taxi runway, even if you laid out war and peace, the abbreviated version. If you get a response, high five, your A game starts. You have to be able to respond to anything. Even the single line you get back that says " Hi. How are you " Death is imminent if you give a Male response of "good thanks" The game is really started with a pic. How it plays is governed by your ability to chat. Many guys cannot achieve the output But a lot of women cannot chat well either. But then, they have the V power ......
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RHP User
7 years ago
Definitely send a message that shows you've read the profile and have a brain. I'm sure it can be disheartening when you take the time to message and then to get no reply, but in all honesty...Would you want to know them anyway when they don't even have the courtesy to respond to you? I appreciate when someone puts some effort into their message. I always respond to messages, regardless if I'm interested or not. Perhaps you're just messaging the wrong people? - Posted from rhpmobile
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countrytouch82
7 years ago
I've been tempted to reply with just "good" to the response of "hi how r u", not as a male response but as sarcasm, considering the effort and length in my original message :) But I've gone normally with a follow-up couple of questions to try and get some more information. If the response again is something like "not bad" etc, then I know I really do get better return vocalisation from my dog :) (and he is certainly real and willing to go out) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
“Best material” ..... sounds like a templated routine Your best material.... is their profile, and their words - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
I will definately take what youve all said on board. Cheers! And thanks for the compliment Annie. I dont think of myself as attractive but its still nice to hear it. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
When you get 1 word or simple phrase answers then they're trying to be polite in declining by not showing interest but at least responding? At least that's the way I take it if that happens to me. Either way again, are they really worth knowing if they don't talk?
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AnnieWhichway
7 years ago
I often message back with as much as l get. Just out of interest to see the result. They dont take the hint. And as such if l didnt pull up stumps, it would take several weeks for a coffee date, several months for a root...... And there are plenty of women as well as guys around with shit messaging skills. It's not gender related, just quantity of guys which slew the totals
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countrytouch82
7 years ago
Sometimes I wonder if some people don't understand the messaging system. That it is each person only once at a time, each person gets a chance to respond then it is the other person's turn. To send a message directly after your last one then you need to be a paying member, unless you were replying to one. Perhaps some people send a short silly little message actually intending to write/add something more later, then realise they can't until they get a reply? Some other sites just have an open conversation running once someone has initiated it, either person in the conversation is then free to write anything at any time. - Posted from rhpmobile
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EarthQueen
7 years ago
Agree. It’s a stupid messaging system. It stops spontenaity. The open messaging is much better . OP the only thing I would suggest is throw a bit of humour into your opener. Most women like a man that can make them smile. It doesn’t have to be a novel. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
I do have a few funny lines to use so I will keep that in mind as well. - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
7 years ago
Be respectful, note some points on her profile, be cheery, chuck in some comedy, come across as intelligent.Can you tap dance as well.......?
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RHP User
7 years ago
You need to address a deeper issue... Why are you messaging them ?? Answer that truthfully to yourself before concerning yourself with the content of the message.... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
My first advice is to not tie yourself up in knots worrying about what to write. One message might work well for some but then crash and burn with others (refer to the first 4 replies) and it's no simple thing to determine what's going to work for any given target. It's wasted energy to worry too hard about this. In terms of getting people to reply to your messages, my experience will tell you that the best return on your energy investment is to work on getting your body fat percentage as low as you can and also work on taking photos that give the appearance of such. My feedback on your suggested opener is that all opening messages imply that. Now, I personally would love your direct approach, I value efficiency and like to get from A to B in the quickest/easiest way possible. But, I would suspect that your target market would respond better to something more entertaining, possibly humorous. I find that they value emotions and like to be lead on an exciting journey of different emotions before arriving at their destination. The buildup is as important as the climax. As for not wasting your good material, this is the internet. I'm sure you know how to cut and paste.
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RHP User
7 years ago
I would have thought it obvious why anyone messages anyone. Yknow.... for sex? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
... Therein lies your problem.... You message with “omg she’s got and I wanna fuck her” kinda mindset without it being conscious to you... And it’ll calibrate your messages to a boring kind of level instead of being relaxed and with the intention of introducing yourself .... In other words your mind is paralysed with “how or what do I say to turn her into that sexual beast I’m after??” instead of a softened approach with genuine interest in them as a person... Forget your end game, concentrate on showing yourself and allow them to be naturally attracted to how and who you are.... As for fake profiles, yes you’ll find em here, but they’re easily identified... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Coz i think you think you a might fancy yoyrself as a bit of a mind reader. But it's pretty clear that you dont know what actially goes on inside my head. This is pretty much a sex/hook up site... at least I think it is anyway last time I checked. The purpose of my message and this topic in general if you must know is to basically ask if you are interested in chatting further if you like what you see and read. Its easy to make one click on a profile, look at pics and read the text. Surely i shouldnt have to say that in an initial message should I? Or are people really that dumb that I need to? - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
7 years ago
Red flag there.Treat the women like they are on a sex site and there is that thing called crash and burn.Treat them like any normal dating site is key
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RHP User
7 years ago
Between Anti and other 'men' here. For all the vulgar and provocative comments he posts...he's actually a genuine guy who sends thoughtful and interesting messages...with no thought to the end game of this being "just a sex site" so all the women here should be easy pickings with no need for effort in conversation. Mock him all you want..but ask him how many RHP women are half in love with him already ;) lol - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Fuck mate, I’m not an iPhone 😂😂 Make of my post what you will, but I’m not about to get into a pissing contest about it. But I will say I disagree with your analysis of your original Post..... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Quoting 'Eiliethiya' Between Anti and other 'men' here. For all the vulgar and provocative comments he posts...he's actually a genuine guy who sends thoughtful and interesting messages...with no thought to the end game of this being "just a sex site" so all the women here should be easy pickings with no need for effort in conversation. Mock him all you want..but ask him how many RHP women are half in love with him already ;) lol - Posted from rhpmobile You're spot on there.
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RHP User
7 years ago
I think they’re in love with my departure 😂😂 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Ive only sent really respectful first messages. I never flat out asked for anyone to fuck me in any messages. And when i get told that they arent interested in me then I always thank them for at least responding. But it seems people are quick to judge without knowing the full story. Not that i care about the judgements of anyone whos not perfect themselves. But yes from the forum posts Ive read from AC he does come off as a self righteous windbag at times and thats all I have to go off... so thats how I percieve him. Could I care less that half the women on this site are in love with him? No. Not really. Im not interested in half the women on this site. Just a couple of quality ones. Like the lady i met at Chateau Vino on the weekend. She was amazing. But by all means everyone... tell me Im raising all kinds of red flags for my opinions. This is a forum board. And giving your opinion is part of the process. Unless Im getting it wrong again? - Posted from rhpmobile
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MsJonesy
7 years ago
What you describe as your good material. Why wouldn't you? You don't know if it is a fake profile or a whatevs, until they respond, or not. Always give it your best shot....they are worth it, and so are you.
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RHP User
7 years ago
Someone’s been dropping truth bombs 😃
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RHP User
7 years ago
Truth Bubbles...
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RHP User
7 years ago
At least I got a newer name... So far I’ve got:- - sociopath - parasite - self righteous wind bag(this Is my favourite this month...might use it myself) 😂😂. For people that say they don’t care about what I say, they seem to get hella bent out of shape when I say it 😂😂 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
I was going to go with douchebag instead of windbag but that seemed a little harsh. So windbag it was. But I guess you will have to trust me that when pressed I can deliver epic burns as good as yourself. If not better. Happy Friday! - Posted from rhpmobile
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FeistyFatty
7 years ago
You're wrong there. Not everyone is messaging people "for, ya know, sex". I've received plenty of messages from both male and female members, for friendship. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
I always put in an effort with an opening message. Often with no response but that's just the way life is. But it is nice to get "you're not what I'm looking for" reply sometimes :-)
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FeistyFatty
7 years ago
Expanding on Annie's comment..... Haven't you been on again off again with RHP a few times?? And crashed and burned every time?? I do recall reading this in one of your previous posts. If you actually took some of the advice Anti (and others) are giving you on board, maybe you wouldn't be coming across in such a negative light....... Throwing up red flags as others have mentioned. I have a feeling it wouldn't matter what you write in your messages, the resulting lack of interest would be the same. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
FFF is right I'll message anybody about anything that I want, heck I even try my luck occasionally. This brings my reply rate down to 68%, if I only tried my luck then I'm sure the reply rate would be closer to 6.8%, that is the nature of the beast. Overthink it or go to a creative writing school not much is likely to change.
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RHP User
7 years ago
I know not everyone is not up for sex here. I never said that. Go back and check. I never used those words. But i would wager the vast majority on here are after some kind of hookup. Ive even seen Annie talk about timewasters and the months she is not prepared to waste on getting a root. If you cant see that RedHotPie is not a sex site first and foremost you are delusional. For the record i prefer to be friends with the person im about to hook up with. Thats not the kind of sex I want to have. I have to like the person first as well. I need to know they are a decent human being. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Until you're last few comments and l realised nope no different to other people that hear advice that doesn't agree with them. Totally agree with FFF. The majority of people on my friends lists are well just that, friends. No sex involved. Strange concept l know. Burn away 🙄 Ms PF
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Seachange73
7 years ago
I can understand your frustrations as the non replies is a common complaint from single men on this site. Lots of times, people who don't match my wants don't read my profile and continue on sending me messages, which I subsequently ignore.😎 Always make a good first impression. Like meeting someone in a bar or even in an interview. Keep your messages simple, short and interesting. Maybe something from their profile that piqued your interest. Just shows you did read her profile and you, unlike many men on here, have treated her to be more than a hole to be filled. 😒. You may never know that the next person you contacted may just respond well to you. It's a numbers game. If you sent me a message of 'disinterest', it won't sit well with me and give off the impression that you can't be bothered to chat further unless it's a sure thing. Patience pays off. I've replied to some men who don't match my wants but have sent me interesting, if not funny, non-cliche messages. It has also worked out well for both of us. Good luck.
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Seachange73
7 years ago
Didn't see the last few comments before I posted. I do message friends from here when I was a member. I don't see this site primarily as a 'hook up' site as you do. Most of the people on my friends list are just friends, no sex involved. They are a good sounding board throughout my RHP experience. A slight paradigm shift from how you use RHP.
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RHP User
7 years ago
I go by the moon phases and i think women must too ..i have weeks where i cannot keep up with replys and meeting people to then go months where i hear from no one!! Try some new photos every now and again i think is where effort is best spent! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Someone actually used that on us. "Let me handle your goddesss and we can do coke". I just replied with "How about no". Anything you use would be better than that. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Dont worry mate. We as a couple have been rejected over and over again. One lady last week said 15 minutes was to far to go but loved all our pics etc. To be honest i have never wasted so much time in my life. I have not met one genuine person through this site yet. The wife and i went to mikes place. Its a swingers club that let a limited number of single males. We had a great time actually talking to people . No bullshit texts no waiting 3 weeks for a reply just real people there to have a good time. I would suggest leaving this site it will just wear u down if u cant let it slide over your back. Another example i had a girl contact us saying she liked us etc. She asked us out we said yes great then nothing. This has happened over and over again. So i used to get annoyed now i just dont care. Probably fake profiles to keep u on the hook and paying - Posted from rhpmobile
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MsBlissBombs
7 years ago
I do get annoyed when people haven't read my criteria. They are either too young or they don't live in my selected area. Those two things will get you deleted straight up in my book. I have criteria for a reason. Respect my choices, please! - Posted from rhpmobile
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MsBlissBombs
7 years ago
I do get annoyed when people haven't read my criteria. They are either too young or they don't live in my selected area. Those two things will get you deleted straight up in my book. I have criteria for a reason. Respect my choices, please! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Whatever you write they don't reply. Well.. roughly 3-5% actually will with predefined templates ;) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Anti often likes to go the deep and meaningful... it's hilarious and transparent... Like the guys who talk about dicks etc... we know they just want someone to acknowledge their beautiful penis... some guys want women to notice their insightful warm fuzzy side... Altered.. it's simple.. the world is loaded with self entitled people who are accountable to no-one... on here its 10 times worse... People can be rude arse holes with little to no consequence... they judge, they ignore, they lead you down the garden path... some want attention, some arnt real, some are just naturally rude and arrogant... I can't stand bad manners and I used to get wound up... and even funnier are the people you poke in the ribs with a manners barb after they ignore you and then they finally respond to "defend' their behaviour... those ones are gold!!! It's a matter of accepting you're not everything to everyone except yourself... be content that most able bodied, self entitled twits aren't worth your effort or thoughts... they are the ones who don't answer ;)
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RHP User
7 years ago
Hardly seems worth the effort. I’ve read every profile in my area, written personalized messages to every one and sent. Even the guests with no pictures and had 2 response total. I can totally understand OP’s cynicism in the site. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Oops I just did :-/
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RHP User
7 years ago
Quoting 'jamarion' Dont worry mate. We as a couple have been rejected over and over again. One lady last week said 15 minutes was to far to go but loved all our pics etc. To be honest i have never wasted so much time in my life. - Posted from rhpmobile So...what...do you think she should have thrown you a courtesy fuck? Instead of wasting your time like she did? The nerve of her.. Maybe, one of you is just not as attractive as you say you are.
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RHP User
7 years ago
I didn't get a good vibe from your initial post anyway so its seems a bit contradictory that you "thought I was a decent guy". You're pretty much the kind of woman I avoid contacting anyway with an attitude such as yours. You seem so far up yourself that theres no room for anyone else anyway! Have a good one, luv! 😁 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Not as a preliminary for sex because I dont swing that way but you seem to have similar values to my own. I appreciate your candor. I think we would have some epic LOLs together over a game of pool! Cheers mate! 😊 - Posted from rhpmobile
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Freaky_Fun
7 years ago
Wait. What? You send messages to every female that breathes hoping to get lucky? Surely they're not all your type 🤔 You have nothing in your profile but as usual its everyone else's fault. Yep I'd call that self entitled too. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
"Expanding on Annie's comment..... Haven't you been on again off again with RHP a few times?? And crashed and burned every time?? I do recall reading this in one of your previous posts. If you actually took some of the advice Anti (and others) are giving you on board, maybe you wouldn't be coming across in such a negative light....... Throwing up red flags as others have mentioned. I have a feeling it wouldn't matter what you write in your messages, the resulting lack of interest would be the same." Did you actually read my profile or my other posts? Coz it sure as hell seems like you havent. To save you some time (because I know you are swamped with friend requests from this site) I did actually mention that I met a nice lady on this site previously who took me to Chateau Vino and introduced me to a lot of her friends. And remember i dont care for people who are judgemental unless they are perfect so the next time you are looking in the mirror, ask yourself "Am I perfect?" If the answer is yes, keep asking until you eventually get the right answer. And the day I take Antis advice on anything is the day politicians start being nice to one another. So it aint gunna happen, dahl! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Personally, I prefer short messages. As long as there’s something in them that still indicates they have read my profile😊 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Sending and receiving messages is one of the major downsides of online dating/adult sites. There are many comments I could make on this topic. I have my own personal experiences and learnings as the sender of messages. I also have a lot experience as the receiver of messages and how they make me feel. Any male or female, of our age demographic, that starts with 'hi' or 'hey' or 'emoji' has just shot themselves in their own foot. Why would anyone, that's found a profile their attracted to, do that to themselves? The next one that ranks poorly, in our age demographic, is 'how's your day going/been'? It's like 'well I've been alive for 47 years but yes/no today is going okay'. I think asking someone to read your profile and reply if they're interested is not a bad strategy at all. I also agree with one of the other comments that having a standardised introduction that you can copy and paste and tweak (if you find your dream profile) is also an excellent strategy. I could offer you one critique. I am sorry I can't help myself because I work in adult education and giving feedback is what I do best. I will not give it in the public domain so you can message me if you want to. I am in Brisbane so I am not trying to pursue anything with you. Here's to us all. It's a jungle out there! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
We have no single men plastered all over our profile and still get messages from single guys. I would write the best opening message you can dream up, save it to templates and use it for all first messages unless there is a particular reason you are messaging them. If you both enjoy skydiving, base your message around that. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
You could always go to one of those really shonky sites and get bombarded with requests to talk dirty with some really horny women who just happen to be in your hood. You're never going to meet them of course but you will get plenty of attention. RHP is far from perfect but it doesn't tolerate a lot of crap that shonksters pedal. IIWII take it or leave it.
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Seachange73
7 years ago
Too right. Obviously we don't have the right to refuse an offer to fuck when people have been in contact, regardless of our personal wants and needs. Lol. How dare we waste people's time as this is a sex hookup site after all? 😎😄
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RHP User
7 years ago
I prefer a funny quirky or non cookie cutter greeting. Something I might like to read if I received an icebreaker. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Agree totally with Annie, such enlightenment with humour is all too rare. I think your profile is good and you sound like a decent guy. The hits here are far less than the misses and we all struggle.Just treat people the way you want to be treated and the cream will rise to the top. It may take some patience however. PS; If I was going to be picky...I like your second head shot best and I think your bod has great potential and a bit of cardio will get you looking hot, which will definitely help your chances. Plenty of people on here say looks don't matter, but they don't hurt. You are good looking, so make the most of it.
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RHP User
7 years ago
That other head shot is about 4 years old and is the best selfie Ive ever taken or will ever take. I hear a lot of women prefer that they like recent pics so my main one is from a few months ago. I loathe taking selfies as to me it feels very narsaccistic for a guy. But i understand that it is a nessecary evil if you want to be noticed. I am working on the bod too... just joined Good Life for that very reason. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
And that would be my point. You're going so well not sure why you asked for advice in the first place since it was never going to sit well. Ms PF
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RHP User
7 years ago
I like to read their profile and either compliment &or agree with or joke about something theyve written to orove that I've actually read their profile. If theres nothing written on their profile, its a 50/50 on whether they are real or not so a quick compliment or a playful tease about their pic will do. Adopt the k.i.s.s approach too and don't be too disheartened with radio silence too My 2cents :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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FeistyFatty
7 years ago
""Did you actually read my profile or my other posts? Coz it sure as hell seems like you havent. To save you some time (because I know you are swamped with friend requests from this site) I did actually mention that I met a nice lady on this site previously who took me to Chateau Vino and introduced me to a lot of her friends. And remember i dont care for people who are judgemental unless they are perfect so the next time you are looking in the mirror, ask yourself "Am I perfect?" If the answer is yes, keep asking until you eventually get the right answer. And the day I take Antis advice on anything is the day politicians start being nice to one another. So it aint gunna happen, dahl!"" Ya, i did read your profile and subsequent posts. Hence the comment sans Judgement. You've leapt to that thinking mistake all of your own volition. Your profile still states after numerous memberships and a Vino trip.... no sex. Was only in a recent review of ur weekend trip to Vino where you commented about "being allowed to get naked with an older Couple". As for your default setting for snideness when you disagree with someone's comments...... Glass houses, Pot Kettle, insert eye roll here ...... I never mentioned (nor would I as its laughable) that I felt I was perfect or had a magical mirror as you profess. You actually proved my point quite well. The red flags which a few people mentioned, two of which are your defensiveness and reactive remarks. We've all been privy to throughout the thread unless someone has placated or pandered to you. As for the Dahl comment...... eeewww completely made my skin crawl as I exit this thread...... I'm outtie ..... Good Luck Dude🤦♀️🤷♀️ - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Of the trash taking itself out! Bye felicia! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Just send a nice respectful message. A little about yourself. A little about what the person has said in there profile. Dont go over board . Dont jump threw hoops, like some on here exspect you to do. And yes there are plenty on here who consider this a place to find someone for a sexy time. Dont give up - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
It’s hit or miss depending on the lady, just remember that they are overwhelmed with messages and are really picky, Brad Pitt would have a hard time getting a response, just saying - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
I like to at least keep it fun. Eg happy flirty Friday or Merry Sinday(instead of Sunday. Get creative but keep it fun. - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
7 years ago
How these topics bend and transform from the basic first installment. Where's Wind bag. He's gone missing........
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EveryNowAndThen
7 years ago
OP, I understand how you feel re the radio silence analogy. When I first started on RHP, I too would read people’s individual profiles and write my introductions with respect to blend what I’d learnt about them while adding relevant info about me, taking genuine care with the mood of my message, I’d ask a question or two that may encourage a response, and so on. I still do this, and I feel that your original method where you say you did put in a fair amount of effort may have already been your best approach. Even though you say you feel jaded now, and deciding whether to go simple and impersonal, perhaps over time you may benefit by a return to your original approach. For me, I was surprised at near zero percent responses. After a while I noticed the desktop version of the app allowed me to see who had opened my messages. There is the inbox, the sent messages, and an indicator or opened or unopened. I was flabbergasted (great word!) that almost no one had even opened them. If I am/we are/anyone here is to rely upon that as a true metric, then (in my case) any wonder I wasn’t getting responses. In the meantime my own psyche imagined women reading them but not responding. Afterward I felt a differently mixed sense relief and frustration. This ‘unopened/unread’ stat made me feel that there is a potentially high ratio of inactive accounts, and fake profiles. I’ve since become aware that the women on RHP are swamped with messages from single men. So it’s quite possible they may not even be opening all of their messages, let alone reading them, nor responding to them. So now I spend more time reviewing profiles for a sense of activity. To see if the profile appears with the green dot as active online at times. Check if they have made forum posts. Check for any validations. This narrows down the amount of potential people to write to, and continue to write in the original way, with effort, and attention as per the constructive points the other posters have offered. Now that I am more attentive in this way, I get more responses and start chats, etc on the path to wherever each may lead. I encourage you to check which of your introductory messages have been opened, you may be surprised...even flabbergasted 😅 - Posted from rhpmobile
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scfredshows
7 years ago
Yup, I sympathize. I used to be confounded by the women here in regards to how they responded, well mostly didn't, despite their profiles saying that they were interested in a guy exactly like me. It was frustrating being largely ignored, but then I just decided to not let it bother me, if they replied, great, if not, so be it. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Radio silence : We used to reply to all who wrote, and because most don't bother to read profiles but simply look at the photos, they would get aggressive or offended when we turned them down. So we stopped replying altogether. Short but funny: All that said, when a guy who reads our profile and fits the bill writes to us, I don't really care if it is a one liner or an essay, but it's preferable if it's at least a little funny. So a little effort from the right guy/couple is always appreciated. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
..Seeing as we're all friends here, I thought I'd just respond to your private message on the forum...repeating myself is tiring.😉 Anyway, for One, you don't need to explain yourself to a stranger like me. Your posts do that just fine. Two. What kind of response were you expecting to receive for having a public winge about people wasting your time? Sympathy? And Three. No, no, no....you can't reflect my little dig at the end there back on me. It doesn't work like that. Unless, I say I'm attractive too, then you could say that I'm like the pot calling the kettle black. Do you get it? Cheers mate. 😉
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RHP User
7 years ago
Im sorry koolgrey you sound like a control freak that knows everything. Im sorry u feel the need to keep this going - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
It really means a lot to me that you've shared your own experiences and offered me advice on my original post. It shows me the content of your character in ways that I wasnt expecting. I thought this thread would be lucky to reach page 2 but here we are now. I think Im going to recind my paid membership now that I know places like CV exist and that you can just meets some really cool people there. Thats seems like a far better use of my precious dollars than using it to send messages to others on this site. Hope to meet some of you awesome human beings in the near future perhaps! Cheers to you good ones! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
I think we can all see this topic as a worthwhile insight into why some people complain about the things they do
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RHP User
7 years ago
Another gent who's upset about the lack of attention he's receiving. I always say it's a womans world with online dating & pretty much everywhere else come to think of it 🤣 You're an expendable commodity my friend & if a lady has the time, energy or inclination to talk to you, then you have to remember that she will have a myriad of suitors with a range of different benefits to offer. My advice is just be kind & pleasant & make it to that first coffee date. Or if it's just dating you're after the vanilla sites/apps are loaded with pics from 10 years & 10 kilos ago 😡..... 🤣🤣 Seriously, dating is horrendous, how hard is it to find that 1 good little lady. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Quoting 'alteredcarbon71' That other head shot is about 4 years old and is the best selfie Ive ever taken or will ever take. I hear a lot of women prefer that they like recent pics so my main one is from a few months ago. I loathe taking selfies as to me it feels very narsaccistic for a guy. But i understand that it is a nessecary evil if you want to be noticed. I am working on the bod too... just joined Good Life for that very reason. - Posted from rhpmobile We all have to be a little narcissistic here...some more than others it seems .Can I then advise you take the old pics down? Just be yourself. You're hair looks good when shorter too, but that's just my opinion...love a good head of hair which you have!Ms Red PS: I haven't bothered to read all the trolls comments, but obviously some people just don't have lives and consider themselves perfect above all others...
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RHP User
7 years ago
Agree with you on non repliers. If the profiles match then the common courtesy of a reply would be nice. We don't reply to people outside our criteria. Also wonder how many fake profiles are on here especially women and pretenders, dreamers, pic hunters and tyre kickers.
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RHP User
7 years ago
Newton's Laws tell us these women are at least just a little bit attracted to our bodies.
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RHP User
7 years ago
As Ive just mentioned I will probably reduce my membership through this site and go back to being a guest. My hair and my eyes are the only things I rate about myself and i do like my hair longer but only when its been freshly washed that day. Otherwise its a pain on the 2nd day to have slightly greasier hair when its long. But I am going short now its summer and its getting in my road at gum classes so im getting most of it chopped off again!😊 If you guys are ever up Brissy way or i somehow get down to Adeliade i would love to meet up and have a drink and a few laughs with you both.... - Posted from rhpmobile
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Freaky_Fun
7 years ago
I love threads like this its gives great insight into peoples personalities. The good thing about face pics is you know who to avoid at clubs. The irony of some comments is just too much 😂 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Love how people expect others to know exactly what angle in a message works specifically for them. At the end of the day no amount of clever msg makes any difference if they simply don't like your profile. I've had way more luck in going that route instead of trying to come up with some cute, witty or funny opening msg. I once persisted with someone who ignored my first couple of msgs. She now calls me one of her best friends. That is a perfect example of how crap the whole thing is 😂 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Quoting 'Scottlq8' Love how people expect others to know exactly what angle in a message works specifically for them. At the end of the day no amount of clever msg makes any difference if they simply don't like your profile. I've had way more luck in going that route instead of trying to come up with some cute, witty or funny opening msg. I once persisted with someone who ignored my first couple of msgs. She now calls me one of her best friends. That is a perfect example of how crap the whole thing is 😂 - Posted from rhpmobile So you harassed your way into the friendzone? Sorry Scotty, I couldn't resist. I agree with what you say and I think you make a good point. No reply doesn't necessarily mean no interest, it could simply mean they got distracted and forgot to reply so resending at a respectable frequency can be successful.
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RHP User
7 years ago
Quoting 'alteredcarbon71' I was going to go with douchebag instead of windbag but that seemed a little harsh. So windbag it was. But I guess you will have to trust me that when pressed I can deliver epic burns as good as yourself. If not better. Happy Friday! - Posted from rhpmobile I would have gone with grovelling beta.
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theoxisback14
7 years ago
Definitely make sure you read their profile,just because someone is a matching profile doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re what they’re looking for. Give a bit of praise about their profile that you liked but not too much, Keep your message short and to the point then leave it in their hands. Don’t worry about the non reply’s just focus on the ones that do reply,there’s lots of decent people on here and lots of friends to be made - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Even Google was of of no use. Help a brother out? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Bahaha Brilliant job OP on tearing down the narcissistic posts that are essentially the pot calling the kettle black! As a single woman ive found this a nasty task to say the least. My time gets wasted a lot. Thats without counting the insults, wanking vids and fake profiles. Ive been stood up and ghosted many times only to find little no onus is expected of the males on this site by the wider community. Instead its my responsibility to pick the right guys. Or be fucking psychic i guess. Then im a bitch for being judgemental. Then i get on here and i see over and over again men and couples complaining women are stuck up and or dont answer them. Same stuff happens to me too, then i also get worse. I feel ive put up with much more than most women would. Essentially deciding to delete themselves. In another time in my life i wouldve too. However, doing so would mean the narcs win. So fuck em i stay and i dont care who doesnt show. I scratch them. They can stay home and masturbate whining they get no answers. I fully understand why women either dont respond or are rude. I often just stay home. Investing little to no effort then i hook up when i want. I always half expect my time to be wasted. No second chances though and i never ask them chasing them why i havent heard from them. I did that ONCE. Never again. No doubt he is still snivelling somewhere dripping with immaturity and trying to work out how to boil an egg (is it just me who cannot believe that? You find that shit out later. Theres never anything in a profile on it!)If people cannot politely set me free then i dont care. Im not messed up its a reflection of their own shit. There is nothing wrong with your profile or approach. Its taken guts to ask this lot too. As youve seen. Its a numbers game. It takes a lot of balls to do many of things ive done. To say im jaded is to say the least. Abeit i am also validated. Being reminded why i dont bother too much with men or people. My sense of humour gets me through. And a vibrator that broke months ago. Still smilling! - Posted from rhpmobile
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countrytouch82
7 years ago
Is even if you match everything they say and vice versa, there's still the good ol attraction (or lack of) bit and the numbers bit, and convenience thing re distance often. And then there's just plain old confusing. I've just messaged someone (another site) who's reply (yes I got one) told me I was too old. Her preference says 30-38 for her age of 30. I'm 36. Huh? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
In this place a guy is a bit like a grain of sand, so part of a picturesque shoreline (or a trailer load of earth), not easy to define a single grain from the other, unless it distinguishes itself.....grains of sand, trees in a forest, ball in a ball pool....etc etc. It takes effort, summon a bit of thespian 🎭, invoke some curiosity, put yourself in her place....it’s not easy but when you get a response there is a degree of satisfaction that you did indeed rock the introduction....☺️👍👍 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
I fully understand and empathise what wonen have to go through on any dating site, let alone this one. I have a great deal of respect for women in general... except for the ones that show me none. And i have encountered a few recently and not just on here. As Ive mentioned i think the best way to go it to forget the computer screen and actually go to a swingers club. Had the best time recently and the price was pretty comparable to 3 months worth of messaging here at RHP. Country Touch. Been there. Done that. Its infuriating AF when they outright contradict themselves but i think youve dodged a bullet mate. Because its sounds like shes all over the place like a mad woman's shit. Avoid the crazy types! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
To be honest..... I’m dumbfounded at the volume of time and effort you’re putting into paying attention to, and relying to a topic about people not paying attention or replying to you.... while at the same time informing us of your relative “success” away from this site. I see a rather comical irony in that.
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RHP User
7 years ago
Its called discussion I believe. Thats generally what happens when you make a topic and then through the course of that discussion come to realize through the constructive criticism and suggestions of other people in this thread change your opinion and your mind set. Thats what normal people do usually. But if you're butt hurt over calling out Anti, or that Im getting attention from people or WHATEVER has brought you to tears of comical irony then can i suggest one thing? Tissues are currently on sale at the Chemist Warehouse mate. Grab a couple of boxes for yourself. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
7 years ago
Annie Whichway is on the money! To add a snippet of my perspective...as a single woman on here the odds are in my favour and I am inundated with flirts and messages. I do my utmost to respond with politeness to all except those generic one liners that seem as though I am just another number and one “may as well give it a go...” I respond to a polite, respectful opener that points out something key from my profile... you don’t have to write a novel, just one line that makes it personal. It may also be of help to note that once a connection has been made, patience is required. It is not lost on me that my potential suitors get frustrated with my inability to coincide dates however we all live busy lives and prioritize subjectively. - Posted from rhpmobile
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