M70
Is it because I'm old fashioned? Or just old?
November 18 2017
Comments
-
HotNightsGC
8 years ago
Your outlook is definitely not old. You sound like a considerate partner to me. There are a lot of men out there that don’t consider a woman’s pleasure as their priority. And I guess there are some women who prefer to pleasure their men before themselves aswell. So I guess there’s definitely a few different ways you could view this topic from. From my perspective as a woman, I enjoy pleasuring my man and don’t mind what order it happens. And I’m lucky enough to have a partner with the exact same attitude. But I guess it really depends on what sexual arrangement you have with somebody as to the level of consideration that’s expected from a sexual encounter. Quick hookups can end in great or equally disappointing endings. Perhaps your friend has more casual hookups and isn’t overly bothered by the no orgasm endings? Maybe it’s more about the intimacy and company than the sexual gratification? But for me there would definitely need to be equal gratification to continue seeing someone in that way. Ms HNP. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
a lot of guys just do not know what they are doing lol
-
RHP User
8 years ago
I don't come easily or often due to previous sexual trauma but I still love sex. The best partners for me are those that focus on my enjoyment but not on the 'task' of getting me off. Sex is so much more than that. To focus on that makes the whole exercise stressful. Your friend has come to accept that she is not an easy comer but still has happy, satisfying relationships with men, so accept that on face value. She's not a 'goal' for you to hit, she's a complex sexual person. I would have thought at your age you could appreciate the nuances of human sexuality and relations. It doesn't mean that the men she is with are doing any thing 'wrong.' - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
I'm sure everyone THINKS they give pleasure, jimmy.....(Read a few profiles in here.... they promise more than the Sham-wow guy...."I love giving pleasure more than anything..... you won't be disappointed!").....etc etc... But thinking and doing are not necessarily the same thing with every partner, every mood or every moment. However..... there's another option to consider. Perhaps, it's not necessarily the guys..... she just may not have the mental connections with these blokes to enable herself to let go with them She may not create that all important mental bridge with them so it doesn't matter what technique they think they have down pat.....how good they feel they are at oral, how good a back rub they like to offer, or how much stamina they claim to have...... it may not help her with her own mental gateways. It's a very male ego principle to assume other guys are at fault, to elevate the self ego. But that 'may' not be the right answer here DG - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
I totally think the same when a female friend tells me that her partner just pumps away and leaves her unsatisfied. I always think about her pleasure first because that's something that gets me off too.
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Have you fucked this women?...
-
RHP User
8 years ago
He is totally right.
-
RHP User
8 years ago
That this is 'advertising' - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
The guys that will not quit when you say you have had enough. Can't stand it. In the end it's all about them and not really the person they are with.
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Yeah we're all individuals, just like everyone else.😈 I have a couple of girl friends, one climaxes easily and the other does not. I know that other women who I have talked to about this also don't climax easily and some of them are not that concerned as they say they enjoy the intimacy anyway. OP thanks for asking, I've often wondered about this.
-
RHP User
8 years ago
that for some men, the overly obsessive focus on getting a woman to orgasm can be more about satisfying their own ego than about a genuine desire for mutual pleasure. Yeah it's shit when a guy doesn't care about your pleasure at all, but it's also shit when a guy has a singular obsession to make you cum no matter what. I don't orgasm during every encounter, sometimes it just doesn't matter what a guy does or doesn't do, it's not going to happen. If a guy insists that I have to cum every time it actually just puts more unnecessary pressure on me and it means I'll probably be less likely to cum. That's why I roll my eyes at all the guys on here who go on about how they have to make sure their partner has cum about 50 times before they will even consider finishing themselves, because frankly to me that sounds just as bad as a guy who pumps away for 30 seconds and then rolls off. I'm a person, not a vending machine that spits out orgasms on demand. (Also, don't be afraid to own the fact that you've at least partly put this up as an advertisement. Advertising is one of the functions of the forum, most of us do it).
-
DynamicCouple36
8 years ago
in our opinion, has better values and more respect. Certainly where we come from and or the way that we were brought up - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'Luck_Dragon' that for some men, the overly obsessive focus on getting a woman to orgasm can be more about satisfying their own ego than about a genuine desire for mutual pleasure. Yeah it's shit when a guy doesn't care about your pleasure at all, but it's also shit when a guy has a singular obsession to make you cum no matter what. I don't orgasm during every encounter, sometimes it just doesn't matter what a guy does or doesn't do, it's not going to happen. If a guy insists that I have to cum every time it actually just puts more unnecessary pressure on me and it means I'll probably be less likely to cum. That's why I roll my eyes at all the guys on here who go on about how they have to make sure their partner has cum about 50 times before they will even consider finishing themselves, because frankly to me that sounds just as bad as a guy who pumps away for 30 seconds and then rolls off. I'm a person, not a vending machine that spits out orgasms on demand. (Also, don't be afraid to own the fact that you've at least partly put this up as an advertisement. Advertising is one of the functions of the forum, most of us do it). that spits out orgasms on demand.......good one!
-
EarthQueen
8 years ago
Some great and honest answers, love it. Every woman is different. Some cum easily, others don't. It depends on so many things. To say its just the mans fault is misguided but at the same time the more pressure that is put on me by the guy about having an orgasm the less sexy it is. I don't want to be told that I'm going to feel X if he does Y. It makes me anxious and being anxious is the killer of being turned on. Its similar to men not being able to get a hard on or cumming too quickly. If there's overthinking its much harder to get there. If my head is is the zone and I'm feeling relaxed its more likely to happen. Getting in that zone involves lots of things how I'm feeling at the time, the build up, technique, how relaxed I am feeling with the person, if my partner listen to me when I tell him what I want, shit, sometimes its just pure luck and good timing. With my ex long term partner 95% of the time I had an orgasm If its me and the vibe its 100% success, with RHP its probably around 50%. What does that tell me? The more relaxed I am the better and also mind has to be in the right place for the body to follow. Also as others said its not the be all and end all. Sometimes its just great to get naked with someone and have some fun.
-
FeistyFatty
8 years ago
Well said 🖒🖒 - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Maybe she isn't communicating to her partners about what she likes and doesn't like. Every woman is different and what does it for one, will do nothing for another. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Subjective.... I can have great sex, but never orgasm.... - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Jimmy I am with you. This is two (or more) people. This is generalisation but I feel that many of the guys these days are selfish. Now I don’t know that for sure as I am only going by what I have been told, but that has to be reason. I will always try and make my partner cum first. Most women do not have a problem punching number two (or three or four) out once the first is done. So that’s the way I play the game and it works fairly well for me. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Does she communicate what she does and doesn't like, in a clear manner that actually would help with BOTH people doing the right things to reach orgasm and have a fun time for BOTH? I don't always orgasm, and that isn't a "hur hur I'm an alpha who can go all night and next day", sometimes you just don't - despite the common wisdom that all it takes is a matter of pumping. Doesn't mean it was bad, doesn't mean they didn't care .... sometimes it just wasn't happening, sometimes it's on me for not communicating what works, meh... Good advert for how caring you are about orgasms though ;)
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Surprised the OP hasn’t made any further comment! Bet this thread didn’t go the way he expected. Perhaps not so much old fashioned but more about lack of experience. I assume you have been with the same partner most of your adult life?
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'HotNightsPerth' Your outlook is definitely not old. You sound like a considerate partner to me. There are a lot of men out there that don’t consider a woman’s pleasure as their priority. And I guess there are some women who prefer to pleasure their men before themselves aswell. So I guess there’s definitely a few different ways you could view this topic from. From my perspective as a woman, I enjoy pleasuring my man and don’t mind what order it happens. And I’m lucky enough to have a partner with the exact same attitude. But I guess it really depends on what sexual arrangement you have with somebody as to the level of consideration that’s expected from a sexual encounter. Quick hookups can end in great or equally disappointing endings. Perhaps your friend has more casual hookups and isn’t overly bothered by the no orgasm endings? Maybe it’s more about the intimacy and company than the sexual gratification? But for me there would definitely need to be equal gratification to continue seeing someone in that way. Ms HNP. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'FatFunFiesty' I think you're completely off base and misguided if you think that her partners are doing anything "wrong" at all. That in itself is old fashioned to me. I'm a woman who doesn't orgasm easily. Never with other partners but always with my hubby. And it's certainly not because my partners have failed in some way. I love sex. Love every element from the anticipation prior to the meet to the kiss good bye. I've never held partners to account for MY orgasm. Obviously your friend enjoys her partners and her meets so what gives you the right to dissect that. You've made sweeping assumptions about her being left unsatisfied and clearly she isn't or she wouldn't continue playing. I think this is blatant "advertising". - Posted from rhpmobile Advertising? You don't know me and hence you have no idea
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'lovebitten' I don't come easily or often due to previous sexual trauma but I still love sex. The best partners for me are those that focus on my enjoyment but not on the 'task' of getting me off. Sex is so much more than that. To focus on that makes the whole exercise stressful. Your friend has come to accept that she is not an easy comer but still has happy, satisfying relationships with men, so accept that on face value. She's not a 'goal' for you to hit, she's a complex sexual person. I would have thought at your age you could appreciate the nuances of human sexuality and relations. It doesn't mean that the men she is with are doing any thing 'wrong.' - Posted from rhpmobile Sex, to me, is, or should be, a whole bunch of fun
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'lovebitten' That this is 'advertising' - Posted from rhpmobile It's just my viewpoint
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'CandyDelicious' The guys that will not quit when you say you have had enough. Can't stand it. In the end it's all about them and not really the person they are with. Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' I'm sure everyone THINKS they give pleasure, jimmy.....(Read a few profiles in here.... they promise more than the Sham-wow guy...."I love giving pleasure more than anything..... you won't be disappointed!").....etc etc... But thinking and doing are not necessarily the same thing with every partner, every mood or every moment. However..... there's another option to consider. Perhaps, it's not necessarily the guys..... she just may not have the mental connections with these blokes to enable herself to let go with them She may not create that all important mental bridge with them so it doesn't matter what technique they think they have down pat.....how good they feel they are at oral, how good a back rub they like to offer, or how much stamina they claim to have...... it may not help her with her own mental gateways. It's a very male ego principle to assume other guys are at fault, to elevate the self ego. But that 'may' not be the right answer here DG Trust me buddy, I have zero need to elevate my self ego. Way too old for that bullshit
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'lovebitten' I don't come easily or often due to previous sexual trauma but I still love sex. The best partners for me are those that focus on my enjoyment but not on the 'task' of getting me off. Sex is so much more than that. To focus on that makes the whole exercise stressful. Your friend has come to accept that she is not an easy comer but still has happy, satisfying relationships with men, so accept that on face value. She's not a 'goal' for you to hit, she's a complex sexual person. I would have thought at your age you could appreciate the nuances of human sexuality and relations. It doesn't mean that the men she is with are doing any thing 'wrong.' - Posted from rhpmobile She isn't a "goal" for me to "hit". And, yes,at my age I DO understand the nuances
-
RHP User
8 years ago
None of you have any idea of the balance, desire, experience, I try to bring to a partner. For me, helping/leading/fucking a partner to an orgasm is NOT some fucking mark on my bedpost. It's a totally sincere desire to help her/us to a fantastic orgasmic experience. And I'm advertising? Please don't insult me. Do you really think I'm advertising some old, pot bellied, skinny legged guy? I'm just telling my story/profile with honesty and authenticity.You have NO idea of me or my story.
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'k3608NR' Jimmy I am with you. This is two (or more) people. This is generalisation but I feel that many of the guys these days are selfish. Now I don’t know that for sure as I am only going by what I have been told, but that has to be reason. I will always try and make my partner cum first. Most women do not have a problem punching number two (or three or four) out once the first is done. So that’s the way I play the game and it works fairly well for me. - Posted from rhpmobile and for me that's the crux of the matter. If satisfaction for her is drinking coffee, that's what I want. If it's hard fucking, that's what I want. If it's map reading, that's what I want. For me, it's what makes HER happy, that's what I want
-
RHP User
8 years ago
and I imagine every other woman, is firstly good old fashioned honesty 😉 without which the rest will never happen. Just sayin
-
RHP User
8 years ago
So you didn't post the topic as an advertisement. You obviously didn't post it to take on board opinions from women themselves about what they like and don't like, and our own experiences with this particular topic. So why did you post it?
-
RHP User
8 years ago
This is about the time when I fake an orgasm. Then exit stage left Loose their number. 😂
-
RHP User
8 years ago
I don't think you're "just saying" at all. I think you're getting pedantic about his exact age and getting all self righteous about honesty. Disingenuous at best and dishonest at worst. If you really want to know his age, which is "too old for you" ,he is approximately a year older than me.
-
its4u2
8 years ago
Hi I have a lovely friend whom I met on another site. She's totally lovely and has been with a number of men. I get that. But over coffee recently, she said she doesn't cum often. I know she fucks herself every morning with her vibrator, so orgasms aren't the issue. So, I thought, WTF are her partners doing? WTFt is WRONG with men who don't value their partner's pleasure over their own? How can you POSSIBLY leave a partner unsatisfied? This is NOT an advert, but FFS, are guys not valuing their partner's pleasure? For me, if she's not having fun I'm CERTAINLY not! Sex for me is her/us. not me. Am I just old? Grumble grumble Hi JimmyJams You certainly are a real caring gentleman. I myself was like your lady. Having 2 ex husbands, 1st one wham bam thank you man, the 2nd one well what do say absolutely nothing happened in the bedroom for 10 years. Yep I certainly knew how too pick them.I never had a vibrator either, I just put up with it, no sex at all, that was until I met the other half who is photographed with me, and wow what can I say. He is absolutely amazing. Fulfills my every need and more. He is loving and caring and says if he isn't pleasing me, then he won't please himself.I have never met anyone like him previously, although i have only had 2 exes previously who I already wrote about, nor did i even think about pleasing myself at all. Old fashioned I would say i was not too do that, although I did do it about Feb this year and OMFG wow worked a treat, but the real thing is much more pleasing and pleasurable.I have even moved just over 2000 kms so my and his pleasures are fulfilled in the most amazing way. Yes they are.
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Hi JJ, I think your taking the comments personally when they weren’t directed at you. Ppl are just talking about their own experiences.
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' OMG that felt goooood. I felt it when I stopped following the 'just want to know the meaning' thread. There's only so much eye rolling you can do before you risk permanent damage to your eyeballs, 'ya know
-
EarthQueen
8 years ago
I thought it’s a great topic and interesting answers. 👍 - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
8 years ago
I'm not the one lying. 4 different ages he's given. Starting in the high 60's, then 61, then 62 and states he's 63 in his profile. My best guess now would be 70's? 😉 So you're calling me out over calling someone else out about lying about their age? Only liars condone lying, just sayin
-
RHP User
8 years ago
As I said you're being pedantic and not for the first time. I have met JimmyJams for a coffee and a chat so I just happen to know that he is approximately one year older than me. Our precise age is really quite irrelevant, especially to you because we're both outside of your preferred age group, and not just by a month or two... Re-read my previous post and see if you can get the message.
-
gazpacho
8 years ago
People really have to take ownership of their own pleasure. All the starfish bitch about not getting off. Seriously you get back what you put in. Hugs G
-
RHP User
8 years ago
As a person who has always struggled with orgasm, I can say, go Hug y'self. Peachy, LMBAO
-
RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'PeachyPearL' As a person who has always struggled with orgasm, I can say, go Hug y'self. Peachy, LMBAO Oh that's right, the mods wouldn't allow that, would they.
-
RHP User
8 years ago
That'd be off topic... Gaz and I are old friends... Peachy
Boards
-
Hot Topics
Topics: 15103 Comments: 88152
-
Girls Ask
Topics: 1416 Comments: 10236
-
Guys Ask
Topics: 2519 Comments: 11690
-
Couples' Corner
Topics: 2503 Comments: 9758
-
Swingers Lifestyle
Topics: 1001 Comments: 5139
-
Fetish & Fantasy
Topics: 1302 Comments: 5778
-
Hot Travel
Topics: 781 Comments: 1992
-
LGBT
Topics: 170 Comments: 868
Forum help
-
Something related with that
-
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
-
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
-
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
-
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
Share