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RHP

RHP User

F51

Keeping yourself safe & who do you tell

April 21 2014

I am still kind of new to this whole dating world after 19 years of being with the one man. So initially I thought I was taking valid precautions when meeting up with a new person. I would text a clear face photo, name, phone number and any other details pertaining to the person I was meeting (in a very open & public place) to a couple of unrelated close friends. The person I was meeting would also be well aware this was my preferred "safety net" as it were. I felt this strategy would let the person I was meeting know if they had insincere intensions they could be easily found. However, I am coming across some scrutiny from said friends about how my choices. I also can't imagine a man going to these sorts of lengths to ensure his safety (for want of a better phrase).My questions are: WOMEN - how do you protect yourself from the possibility of meeting up with someone not so safe?Other than public meets or telling a friend. MEN - Does that sort of thought cross your mind? Do you take any precautions when meeting someone new?

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Comments

  • Lovinit28andKC72

    Lovinit28andKC72

    12 years ago

    I wouldn't meet someone I considered NOT SO SAFE. I've only meet with a couple of people, and yes I always tell someone close of my plans.....I have a safe text arrangement with a friend.... - Posted from rhpmobile

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    and a club.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I too am relatively new here too and I have been advised to play it safe. It makes for good peace of mind for you and for the people who care about you. It's like going on a camping trip....you let people know where you are going and when you're expected to be back. You organise contact details and any other arrangements in regards to that...and away you go. I'm not sure if a flare would be appropriate to take on a date ;). However organising someone to call you to make sure all is well might work just as well. It is scary in a way as people can be anonymous or take on another persona on these type of sites....so it does pay to be like the scouts....be prepared :)

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Trust your gut, expect ONLY courtesy..... and really, the main screening you should be doing is BEFORE you decide to meet, through email and phone qualification. Just because I get an email, and a number, is no guarantee that I will choose to meet someone.... I think a lot of people (guys!) seem to glance over that part thinking getting into someone's pants simply because they replied to an email is a done deal. I will NEVER meet anyone without speaking first, and determining that our conversation flows and there is at least good banter. Why waste your time meeting someone you can't talk to?!! Safety for me follows on from conversational comfort and setting the meeting agenda. DG - Posted from rhpmobile

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I always trust my gut instincts - as soon as it seems too weird Im out :)

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    This topic has been done to an extent before. Have to admit I have had bad meets in public in the past. (You live and learn) and have even backed of meets with a gut instinct of "something just isn't right" when I meet someone I always leave details with someone I know an trust. I text them to say I'm ok on the initial meet and at allotted times. I do like to chat to who I'm going to meet to get to know them prior to meeting. I'm a single mum with no family around me so I am aware of safety an try to remain level headed instead of throwing caution to the wind and letting hormones rule me :) All tips on improving safety are welcome

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I might have a meet up for my next RDO...I think it's OK but I don't know as much.I want to meet first play later, there's nearly a fortnight to go so I do have some time to suss it out. We spent 2-3 hours chatting last night, & it seemed to go well. I do believe a person's on line persona is always close to the real thing but still it can be faked. She was a bit defensive when I queried how genuine she was! I'm guessing that I could tell I think she's genuine but I just don't know that for sure.It's obvious that there's more risk for women out there but still there must be some risk for men too. Also I wan t know it's for real before I rent a room...and blow my hard earned.I'll be watching this thread with interest.

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  • MsSuperFoxy

    MsSuperFoxy

    12 years ago

    What do you mean...NOT SO SAFE? Bloody Hell.....one has to be screw loose to met someone in an unsafe situation or place! I'm thinking WH&S need to be involved.... FOXY

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    On safety....... At one point I even requested drivers licence numbers, not now as I always meet with friends. If anyone questioned it, I just didn't meet them...... Any person on this site should know how safety is first and not fuss it..

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    that can be deemed unsafe. That is my endorphin rush that makes the sex amazing. Many times I have just walked away on those situations and said it is not going to happen. You have to be upfront and be dominant to get what you want out of it. Men are just as scared meeting someone in the manner that I meet them. It is comforting to exchange a few messages with a person but those messages can be very misguiding when you actually meet. All you can do is just take your gut instinct and walk away if you feel the need to do so, and pursue those so called dangerous situations if it feels right. In the time Ive been doing this Ive never felt to threatened by the situations I can get in to. And believe me that is a lot.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Poor choice of words. I mean, you can never know for sure. Yes there is the gut feeling. I have culled many due to this for one reason or another. I like to message a few times, email, text and even have a good old fashioned chat on the phone before I meet someone. All of these can give a good indication of what someone MAY be like. But at the end of the day I am not a mind reader or psychic. My questions were what other precautions can I take (other than meeting in public and telling trusted friend - as there seems to be some judgement coming from them of late and I'd rather keep my private life private) and I was curious if men have concerns and "protocols" for their safety. Thanks :) - Posted from rhpmobile

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