M52
Ladies - could you have a relationship with a bicurious masculine guy?
February 09 2011
Comments
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tank__girl
15 years ago
I'm sure I'll followed by a thousand females saying YES Pleeeeaaaase!!?? Mmmm, a sexually adventurous and aware man....as long as you share, and we had equal rules, it'd be fine with me! Lots of men I know are Bi, the longer you leave it, the more you regret it later...I've 'heard' off older men. Tell her, tell her!! Best of luck and FUN with it!! "It's best to regret something you did, than something you didn't do" X
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RHP User
15 years ago
anything's possible, it wouldn't be the kind of thing you should necessarily hide from a new/prospective partner for too long, otherwise they might feel lied to, or you might just pussy out :p . guys who are sexually self-aware and most of all honest and open about their sexuality are a very sweet prize for many girls :) . good luck! . xx Sarah
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RHP User
15 years ago
Let me just say that I knew I wanted to explore my Bi-side for YEARS before I was in a position to try it out and it's definitely worth it to finally find out for yourself. The only thing I should say is that a lot depends on the person u play with so if your first experience isn't what you wanted or expected then don't let that deter you, it might just not have been with the right person for you. (now that I think of it the same goes for sex in general really, lol) One of my biggest fantasies is to have a MMF 3some and not just cos of the potential attention - as far as I'm concerned it is really hot seeing two people enjoying each other and if u can join in then all the better! Problem is that a lot of guys seem to be willing to go MMF but only if they don't have to touch each other (and in my mind that takes some of the fun out of it!). One of the best parts of having a 3some is that sensation of all those hands, mouths, tongues and lips going everywhere until you don't know who is doing what, only that it feels so DAMN GOOD! As far as having a long term relationship goes, google the word polyamoury - there are whole communities of people who live that lifestyle everyday. Everyone has their own rules and boundaries but that is something u work out between yourselves. I say Go For It! There is nothing worse than spending your life wondering "what if....." Good luck!
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RHP User
15 years ago
go for it...just be honest with the lady honesty will get you everywhere in my book good luck roxxy
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RHP User
15 years ago
No. Not all women will accept the competition for your attention from the dudes. They want you all to themselves. As you know, you are quite capable of being in a mongamous relationship with a woman, but the same may not be true of you in a relationship with another dude. What you seem to be saying is that you don't want that anyway... so I don't see the problem. It won't be your fault if you fall in love with a woman who demands a monogamous relationship from you... but it will require you to compromise your sexual desires. I'm not sure what you are meant to do if you are madly in love and don't want to compromise your sexual desires. I mean... you can give up on that love and try to fall in love with someone else who accepts that you play around with guys.... and I say good luck with that idea... and good luck trying to be happy not living with the woman that you truly love.You might be lucky and be in love with a woman who allows you the sexual freedom to root other dudes... but that's pretty rare I think.HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
I would not go into a relationship with a guy that is bi at all. < I would however have alot more respect for him if he told me the truth from the get-go rather than hide it from me and eventually be caught out or break down and tell me the truth. < If you want a truly loving relationship, then be honest from the start! Nothing is worse than starting a relationship on lies...any lies! You have a right to be bi...but she has a right to the truth! xFunlovingx
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'xFunlovingx' I would not go into a relationship with a guy that is bi at all. < I would however have alot more respect for him if he told me the truth from the get-go rather than hide it from me and eventually be caught out or break down and tell me the truth. < If you want a truly loving relationship, then be honest from the start! Nothing is worse than starting a relationship on lies...any lies! You have a right to be bi...but she has a right to the truth! xFunlovingx Don't take this as any form of criticism Fun, but they're strong words..... most blokes don't know if they are bi on account of the fact that they like women so much... this is especially true of young men.. and even if a guy does get a little aroused by other blokes, most of those don't identify as bisexual anyway..... so this being honest position has a flaw.... a bisexual identity doesn't always follow the person's self image... how he perceives himself... so could begin a relationship from an honest position so far as he is self aware.... Also, as I said, it's quite reasonable for a person to be in a mongamous relationship... and that same fact holds true even if a person who identifies as Bi.... It's interesting that you say that you wouldn't go out with a bi guy.. but you haven't articulated why you say so.HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
I'll go further to say on teh position that you would never enter a relationship with a bi guy... by asking how would you know if he was bi... or how would you know you haven't already been in a relationship with a bi guy?... I mean.. how would you know.. if he doesn't even accept it as his sexuality?? HUgsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'stalky' Quoting 'xFunlovingx' I would not go into a relationship with a guy that is bi at all. < I would however have alot more respect for him if he told me the truth from the get-go rather than hide it from me and eventually be caught out or break down and tell me the truth. < If you want a truly loving relationship, then be honest from the start! Nothing is worse than starting a relationship on lies...any lies! You have a right to be bi...but she has a right to the truth! xFunlovingx Don't take this as any form of criticism Fun, but they're strong words..... most blokes don't know if they are bi on account of the fact that they like women so much... this is especially true of young men.. and even if a guy does get a little aroused by other blokes, most of those don't identify as bisexual anyway..... so this being honest position has a flaw.... a bisexual identity doesn't always follow the person's self image... how he perceives himself... so could begin a relationship from an honest position so far as he is self aware.... Also, as I said, it's quite reasonable for a person to be in a mongamous relationship... and that same fact holds true even if a person who identifies as Bi.... It's interesting that you say that you wouldn't go out with a bi guy.. but you haven't articulated why you say so.HugsStalky Nah didn't take that as a criticism at all. I was just merely answering his question! And as my post stated too...it's about any lie! My son's dad has gone into a marriage without telling his wife that he has a child from when he didn't even know her! I think that is a HUGE lie to go into to a marriage and can't see that working for long...as for sure she will find out eventually. < I don't feel that I need to explain why I won't be with a bi man...that is my preference as is others preferences to not be with blondes or girls with big boobs! I also will not sleep with guys that are not white caucasian...just my preference...no offense to anyone! I know who I want to sleep with and I know what turns me on and what doesn't! ; Am I to be persecuted now because I gave an honest opinion? Are we only to answer in the affirmative? That will not give the OP a chance to weigh up both sides! xFunlovingx
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RHP User
15 years ago
That's my ideal actually. To be in relationship with a bi guy... Well as long as he is willing to occassionally share some MMF experiences with.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'xFunlovingx'..... I was just merely answering his question! And as my post stated too...it's about any lie! ............. <; Am I to be persecuted now because I gave an honest opinion? Are we only to answer in the affirmative? That will not give the OP a chance to weigh up both sides! xFunlovingx Nah... but you know... I challenge your implication that if you are bi... you must be lying to your lover.. and as I tried to point out that's a leap of logic that defies... errr.... logic... Apart from that... if you're feeling persecuted because I've pointed that logic out.. well I was just trying to appreciate your comment and I'm sorry that you feel you're being persecuted, just because you say you prefer to fuck straight white boyz. HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
The person's sexuality never enters into it for me. It is the person that I am entering the relationship with. If he were to be bi then that would be a big part of his life and something that I would wat to be told about. I think that it would be one of the things we would have discussed during the course of our getting to know each other stage anyway. As you are single and only bi-curious at this stage, you seem a little confused as to what you actually want. Try an MFM or MMF while you are single and see how things go first. Who knows, you may fall in love with a man and want to settle down with him instead of her...stranger things have happened.
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tank__girl
15 years ago
...Alfred!? Now I don't agree with 'you'..! As Sarah said, HONESTY is the KEY in all relationships!! No secrets, and you won't have to live your life looking over your shoulder, 'covering your tracks' and living with a shitty concious. Jelousy creeps in in all relationships too, well not 'all', all types. But everybody is different, I'm sure, well know for a fact, that there are many many couples on here who 'have' had similar experiences without any issues?? Some people are just insecure. Maybe this is 'the one' who 'will' love and accept you for who you are, and have no issue with it, realising it's 'just' sex and you LOVE her. Who are we to say "She'll get jelooouuuus!!". You say you 'just' want to 'play' with them right? My man got a bit jelous and funny when I first said I wanted to join RHP looking for females. But he got over it once he realised it was 'just' playtime, and once she left I forgot about her...pretty much Ok, you're still 'interested in meeting the right woman' you say? You do like someone, but haven't yet settled down? Maybe before you confess your fantasy to the 'one', and risk scaring her before you know her too well or what not, while/if you're still single, you could put it out there, or here on RHP?! Why not play around, experimenting with others along the way while you can, and find out if this 'is' really something you would, and do want to make sacrifices for? Maybe you could post a "Help Wanted" ad in the 'Ask the couples' bit..?? I know a few men that meet couples on a regular basis....Again, GOOD LUCK!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'fionabee' The person's sexuality never enters into it for me. It is the person that I am entering the relationship with. If he were to be bi then that would be a big part of his life and something that I would want to be told about. I think that it would be one of the things we would have discussed during the course of our getting to know each other stage anyway. As you are single and only bi-curious at this stage, you seem a little confused as to what you actually want. Try an MFM or MMF while you are single and see how things go first. Who knows, you may fall in love with a man and want to settle down with him instead of her...stranger things have happened.the 'right' girl, not just 'the girl you happen to be fixated on' will be the one who accepts you as you are. now would be a great time to try a few different situations and combinations and work out who and how you are. You might even find that the girl you like wants to come along on that journey with you (i know, i know, very optimistic, but i'm a sap for other people's love stories!)
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'stalky' Quoting 'xFunlovingx' ..... I was just merely answering his question! And as my post stated too...it's about any lie! ............. <; Am I to be persecuted now because I gave an honest opinion? Are we only to answer in the affirmative? That will not give the OP a chance to weigh up both sides! xFunlovingx Nah... but you know... I challenge your implication that if you are bi... you must be lying to your lover.. and as I tried to point out that's a leap of logic that defies... errr.... logic... Apart from that... if you're feeling persecuted because I've pointed that logic out.. well I was just trying to appreciate your comment and I'm sorry that you feel you're being persecuted, just because you say you prefer to fuck straight white boyz. HugsStalky are there some woman who would be happy to be with a bi-guy. So sexually adventurous and aware ladies of RHP could you have a relationship with a bi-curious man or will I always have to keep this desire secret from my female partner??? < This is what the OP wrote and this is what I was answering...no more, no less. Who I have been with has no bearing on my reply and what I like doesn't either! I was just pointing out about honesty! And I agree with the others that if he meets "the one" then it should not be an issue for her. < I hope that makes it clearer. xFunlovingx
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RHP User
15 years ago
Until I realised that I couldnt get myself to actually kiss another woman and the idea of going down on her did NOT turn me on at all. I even made myself watch copious girl on girl porn...to no avail. Being curious is fine. Go with it and find out what you like. If you are reently out of a relationship may I also suggest that you take things very slowly...allow the wounds to heal a bit so to speak before beginning another serious relationship.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'fionabee' The person's sexuality never enters into it for me. It is the person that I am entering the relationship with. Hear Hear! People are who they are - whether they were born with girl bits, boy bits or both, but at the end of the day would u really want to be with the kind of person who would condemn your sexuality, regardless of whether it is curious or confirmed? I admit there is a possibility that she might be horrified at the idea and that is her right to (hypothetically) feel that way but if any woman is your one true love then isn't it a repressive expectation to have to deny that? Yes compromise is part of any relationship but there are levels to how much is a compromise and how much is a demand. And insecurity or jealousy is definitely a problem in a lot of relationships but isn't it better to deal with the reasons for the insecurities and jealousy rather than just skirt around it or walk on eggshells, hoping u won't upset them? You put a lot of emphasis on how she might feel if u reveal your curiosity to her but how would you feel about yourself if u never even tried 2 find out? I have always found that pushing any emotions down rather than dealing with then only results in it coming out in other more unexpected and damaging ways.PS I love a good debate especially when it's something I'm as passionate about as this but ultimately it's going to come down to whether Roguish feels comfortable going down that path and whether it feels right to him! :)
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RHP User
15 years ago
I make a point that upon entering a sexual relationship with a women that they know my sexual orientation. The posters here do generally cover the subject well but I would like to add a few points.Your sexuality and sex life are really nobodies business but your own. I don't tell family and friends because it should not matter. If they ask "Do you have a good sex life?" I say yes. I don't have to divulge details.We live in a very different world then when I was young. People where ostracized, lost jobs, even violently attacked. It was even illegal for two men to have sex. Things have changed very much for the better. The posters here on RHP are very liberal minded, part of the reason I enjoy the forums. But the wider community still is a little homophobic, and bi men and women are still seen by many as gay. The word gay is still used in derogatory ways. "That's so gay!" or "He's so gay!" even "How bi!", all are insults in current colloquial language. So a little care must still be exercised when divulging sexual preferences.Being Bi does not make you a serial cheat, a sex maniac, or a pervert (neither does being gay). Personally bi people are more in touch with their social intellect then the vast majority of so called straight people. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with straight. But when someone cringes from a hug, or a show of affection, for fear of bisexuality or gay connotations. Their the ones with the issues no me. So my advice is. It does not matter. There is no need to let them know if your entering a monogamous relationship, but honesty makes for a healthy relationship. If you are that desperate to try, do it before the relationship. If you're after an open relationship let her know from the start. And if you think that you can lie and cheat then be ready to break or have a broken heart.
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RHP User
15 years ago
dude if she loves you for all your other elements of character why would your sexuality be any different?Just telll her and get on with having the awesome life you deserve.I told my current GF and she immediate was thrilled because one of her fantasies is to be in a threesome with two guys and it just made it seem more real for her... we hav a fantastic sex life and are still looking for that moment when our planets align with another sexy guy (or girl... yep... shes keen for that too... awesome...) :Dits a fun journeyLS
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RHP User
15 years ago
I am not so sure the comments here are reflective of women generally on this or other sites.. A while back I entertained the same thoughts and had on my profile bi-curious. Every woman - repeat EVERY one I contacted made it very clear that they would NEVER entertain the thought of meeting or having sex with a bi-curious or bi guy. The experience ended my fascination with the thought as I would rather in the long run be with a woman but it left me with a very bad taste in my mouth (excuse the pun) as many of these women who rejected me we also openly bi or bi-curious, so there is also a very high degree of double standards by many of the women on here. My partner is totally supportive of my desires and has no problem but I just don't advertise it any more. To sarah, Tank and the others on here that have no problem with it, good on you and gradually I suppose the stigma will disappear as more and more people come to realise that it is JUST SEX. I dont crave guys, it's just an intriguing and at times enticing thought, particularly in a group or three/foursome situation. It completes the experience.
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RHP User
15 years ago
I'd also be fine with a bi guy, so long as he wasn't lying to me about those unexpected absences down at the 'club.'
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RHP User
15 years ago
that if we don't want to sleep with bi men...that we are shallow? How is that? My daughter is 18 and told me a few months back that she is bi and has a girlfriend. I have her girlfriend stay here and I love her as a daughter as they have been friends since Grade 4! I think the whole stigma of the "Gay" word is sad....It truly saddens me that you can't sing "Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree anymore"! I mean...Gay does mean Happy! So why shouldn't gays or bi people be happy! There are men out there that won't touch bi-women either...there is no difference! I won't sleep with a guy that has a big cock...does that mean I am shallow with that too! < The only thing I was pointing out was honesty...if he has these feelings or finds out in the end he is bi and wants to be with a woman and settle down...then I think for his own sanity, he should be open and honest about it! It is not "straight" peoples fears that keep these people in the closet...it is their own fears of what people in Society will think! I thought my daughter was Gay and thought so for a long time! When she finally told me she was bi, I asked her why she didn't tell me earlier and she said that although all her friends kept telling her to tell me as I would be fine with it...she still was scared. And is more so terrified that other adults in the family will find out! It is her choice and it did sadden me very much that she felt she had to hide in the "closet" so to speak! xFunlovingx xFunlovingx
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Krissy_G'That is exactly what I meant by being out and proud. I bet your daughter is soo glad she has told you. Krissy, it was sooooo funny when she did! I mean as I said...I thought she was Gay! When she told me she was Bi I looked at her in surprise and said "Oh, I thought you were Gay"!! We laughed and laughed for ages hahahaha! I have always brought my kids up to accept people in life for who they are...not for their weight or disabilities or sexuality or colour! So, think I have done a great job so far! As far as who they have sex with...meh...their choice, not mine! xo xFunlovingx
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RHP User
15 years ago
Women dont want to have a relationship with a man who is bi because it is hard enough to lose out to another woman. Imagine losing out to a man? My God. All her friends will assume she drove him gay. ha ha ha ha ha! l Funlovin Yes you are just a shallow fickle woman. How dare you express that you do not wish to have sex with a man who is bi or who has a big cock. I guess that makes me a little shallow as well. My daughter is bi....how could I not know? My other biological child is severly homophobic!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Hi all - and thanks for the comments. It has been somewhat cathartic just to express this desire and concern re what effect it might have on my life. Plus also nice to stimulate some debate....a mas-debate.....yeah terrible pun.... The comments form the ladies who had no problem with it were nice to read but as someone commented i am not sure they are representative of the typical woman in society....they are more sexy, poised and aware.....anyway one could hope. I do think honesty is the best way, it would be for me anyway. I have to be be upfront and honest with people. Is just in my nature. To Markuss point I do think that been in on the bi-side does make me a more well rounded character. I only thought today when a mate and i hugged at a very blokey work place, just mucking around, that the reason I am blokey and comfortable with this is because of my bi side. I have bought hugging to our work place and it is appreciated by most. So what to do.....well i just gotta get out there and have some bi - experience and have marked down a the last weekend in Feb to do so.....with a mixture of anticipation, nerves and excitement. In between time I seemed to be still besotted by a particular woman........ thanks all for the advice
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RHP User
15 years ago
Oh you must try :)Be careful in your selection of a man. It is your first time, (not knowing your fantasies, wants, or desires) make sure you can express your self to him, and that he shows an understanding of what you have said, and you understand him/her/it. The last thing you want is some mug buggering you, or you him, or what ever, for 30seconds blowing and then off. Make a night of it, a drink, and as you're new TALK freely. I can point out a few that will most likely never make you want to try again.I was lucky, as the first guy I played with was thoughtful and respectful. If i had first timed with some of the monkeys Ive meet out there I would never have come back to the bi game.Then you are on your own, sex is a drug, and once is never enough. So think most carefully. If you truly love her and she has shown interest in you. Forget about trying bi, forget about sex with anyone but her. If she is to be but a desire, goal, a notch on the belt. Go for it. If you can't talk to her about your fantasies (important! before you are intimate), leave her be. If you feel you have the strength to block your other desires, throw away the key to that closet door, do so with out regret, for her. If not you will end up in frustration, then resentment, and then the long spiral down to mutual unhappiness.But well you could be a lucky man and she will love the fact you're sexually free, and a bounty of sexual delights await you both..But what would I know, there are 6.5billion ways to conduct a life so try something original LOL.
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N4November
15 years ago
I adore bi men... but I also adore straight men too!! I have 2 very sexy bi-men that I play with alone and we also all play together.... it doesn't get hotter than that!! I would classify them as my closest friends and I find we are in touch everyday. One of them I have known a longtime now and I trust him completely. The other is equally open but I have known him only for a short while. I don't expect him to divulge his activities nor do I expect that I have to devulge mine. I recall at the beginning he was hesitant to be frank about his sexuality to me, but I think he quickly realised that I am open and more interested in 'him' than what his cock can do for me now and then. I'm looking for friendships afterall. Aren't we all? But I understand your dilemma. My advice? Put yourself out there, meet some likeminded guys who are accepting and genuine and give it a go!!! You might find its "not your bag at all" and realise that you just needed to experiment. But above all else, be true to yourself and with others. Give yourself time. To dumb it down, if you are a good sort, the right girl/guy will accept you (straight/bi/curious) and want the picket fence as well. Good luck!!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Well Baygirl I am definitely a good sort, so I had better get those pickets ready :)...........love your profile, intelligent, thoughtful and sexy and delicious breasts........is it inappropriate to flirt in the forum??? Would love to chat sometime....
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N4November
15 years ago
Awwww Roguish, flirt away at your leisure please!!! I had a peek at your profile, but no pics?? Rule number one of RHP - always post a pic!! Not many have the patience or inclination to be attracted to the written word first.... But yes, lets chat sometime :) xxx
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RHP User
15 years ago
I don't think I will ever get to sleep again, I hope for more reasons than posting on this forum. What a bunch of amazing, articulate, liberated, open, sexual and warm people. I am completely new to this site and Melbourne and can't wait to meet some of you in any capacity.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'tyandeb' Every woman - repeat EVERY one I contacted made it very clear that they would NEVER entertain the thought of meeting or having sex with a bi-curious or bi guy. I can vouch for tyanaddeb's point myself. Conflicting 'evidence' notwithstanding, it will always be the case that people with a strong perspective that is against the norm will make the effort to post moreso than those that agree with the norm. (yawn....yeah I know I'll stop with the philosophy psychology whatever) I respect people's preferences and thats that. Some of us aren't the troubled monsters that others might think tho. For me it's all about the sensations and trust and connections. The intangible, non-thinking physical experience of pleasure.; totally untainted by moral perspectives. The best description I have come across is in Krissy_G profile where she says - " I describe my sexuality as Pan. I am not a gender orienated person and am extremeley comfortable with what ever permutation there is. " Hope you don't mind Krissy
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RHP User
15 years ago
I should have mentioned I am a far cry from "normal" and I'm generally not the girl that guys want to have a relationship with anyway. So yes, whilst my ideal would be a relationship with a bi guy, I am far removed from what "normal" is, so you should probably ignore my response to your question.
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N4November
15 years ago
Actually, it doesn't matter what we girls think here - this is all about you is it not?!! . I think you are counting your chickens before they are hatched lol because you actually HAVE TO EXPERIMENT FIRST to decide if having sexual contact with men is what you are interested in!!! . I'll still stick to my advice from my first post: . Put yourself out there, meet some likeminded guys who are accepting and genuine and give it a go!!! You might find its "not your bag at all" and realise that you just needed to experiment. But above all else, be true to yourself and with others. Give yourself time. To dumb it down, if you are a good sort, the right girl/guy will accept you (straight/bi/curious) and want the picket fence as well. Good luck!!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Roguish73'To Markuss point I do think that been in on the bi-side does make me a more well rounded character. I only thought today when a mate and i hugged at a very blokey work place, just mucking around, that the reason I am blokey and comfortable with this is because of my bi side. I have bought hugging to our work place and it is appreciated by most. So what to do.....well i just gotta get out there and have some bi - experience and have marked down a the last weekend in Feb to do so.....with a mixture of anticipation, nerves and excitement. lolz.... well... report back early in March and tell us all how it went. :p Bear in mind (no pun intended) that you are going to find that not all your lovers are going to meet your needs... no matter what their gender. You might find immediately that it's just not your thing... only to discover later that your not into blokes that way... but you are into them in a different way.... or as Baygirl suggests, maybe not at all... that it's just the fantasy that appeals. I mean, people have preconceived notions about what two guys get up to.... but you just can't assume that they swap fucking each other in the arse or something equally benign and boring.HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
Hi Roguish73 - great topic! I'm more than curious, I've known I've been bisexual since I've been 14 or so. It's caused me a lot of unhappiness over the years, due to others' homophobia and what I felt to be an incompatibility with my religion. But now, finding myself single once again, I'm exploring those sexual opportunities and finding them very good. No regrets yet! . I'm not going to tell you anything new when I say that yes, you should tell her honestly. Not neccessarily on the first or second date, over the garlic bread at the restaurant while you wait for the main course... But early on, before things get very serious. Prepare yourself for an initial reaction of shock, maybe even disgust. That could be temporary, followed by a full acceptance once she recovers and thinks about it. Or she might reject you on the grounds of it. That's rare, but as we've seen above, it is possible. . My first two real girlfriends were both bi themselves so it wasn't an issue. (But as open-minded as I try to be, my first gf left me for a woman and it hurt more than I think it would have otherwise.) The more recent one and the one with whom I've been the longest was straight and to my knowledge doesn't have any bi friends. She knew a gay man and a lesbian, but we not-so-immediately-obvious-bi-guys are a different kettle of fish. I told her that I was only just beginning to finally experiment with that side of me when we started dating and that I was prepared to give that up in order to be in a monogomous relationship with her. As I said, this was early on. A few weeks later I was at a party and felt attracted to guy and made the mistake of telling her about how I was tempted to cheat on her - I thought honesty was the best policy but it actually made her unhappy. . She had a fairly low self esteem and said to me a number of times until I told her in no uncertain terms to stop, "Wouldn't you rather be with a man?" -"No," I'd say, "If I did, I would be instead. I want to be with you, that's why I am." Furthermore, my family and social circle wouldn't approve of that, I'd be ostracised if I were to have a relationship with a man. So it was only ever no strings attached sex that was on the cards - and I wouldn't give up a promising long term relationship with a fantastic woman on the basis of getting my rocks off with a man. But the self-evident approach doesn't always work with low self-esteem and she continued to worry about. So, gauge what she thinks. If she's completely fine with it then maybe you can joke about it occasionally and check out the odd guy or two together. But with my lady, she would've rather I never mentioned it again after the initial honesty-check. She was concerned I'd leave her/cheat with a man and she was fairly constantly checking in to make sure I was happy with her and it got tiresome because I was. . So there's a potential pitfall. Not that I think you should just gloss over it instead. But I really think it's important to tell the difference between telling a girlfriend as part of a monogomous relationship and telling a girlfriend because you're hoping for threesome action. Some of the ladies on RHP may be up for that but most women "out there" in the community aren't. Whether relationships should be monogomous or open is another issue. My reason in mentioning it is- would you like this woman enough to give up male-male rendezvous if she asked you to? I did, but as our relationship was monogomous, I also gave up other rendezvous with women, and she was with me to the exclusion of all other men, so that was fair. . Because that's the most likely outcome Roguish, I think you're wise to explore it all and "get it out of your system" before you try to settle down. That way when you tell the future "her", you can spin it as "this is something from my past" if you need to. I think it's very likely she'll accept you, particularly if you tell her in a very honest and vulnerable way. Her initial reaction will be one of respect and empathy. So I'm giving you a 95% chance of being accepted and maybe a 10% chance she'll then be up for threesomes or moresomes with you. Be clear about which is more important to you, being with her or being with her and the occasional guy. If she wants a monogomous relationship and you don't, it's best not to go there in the first place, rather than risk breaking her heart and her idea of bi men by cheating further down the line. . There we go! I hope that was helpful.
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cbdlivin
15 years ago
This has been an interesting read within this forum. From personal experience a lot of woman can become very negative if you mention being bi or bi-curious. I was lucky enough to have a relationship where we both explored our sexuality with no judgement on the choices made. The important thing in a relationship was we did not hide our interests but had a lot of fun exploring them. I always enjoy Stalky's comments, a guy who has been around quite a while and always has a good perspective on things. The woman on here who have said yes please, well its nice to see people with a good open attitude. In the end if you have a curiosity go forth and explore. You do not want to have regrets on what you should have done. B
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RHP User
15 years ago
Well...what can I say...mrscoast here.....firstly rougish if you are entering a new relationship NOW is the time to enlighten your lady friend of your sexual desires and fantasies......and discuss hers as well. We are both bi and as such understand how each other feels about having same sex encounters. It is a natural desire that is in some of us, and if you are truly bi you will be a giver and a receiver and enjoy it all.Lots of women are very turned on by the male/male encounter...so don't be scared, have a D&M with your lady friend....you'll be surprised how accepting she may be......is she Bi?.....(maybe I should've asked that first)....good luck
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RHP User
15 years ago
Well, I am in an extremely happy relationship with a bi guy. Bi guys fall in love with women but not other men. They only need them for sex and maybe witty conversations. He was open with me from the very beginning and with my strict Catholic upbringing, I was more curious then shocked. After being on RHP for over 7months, I prefer bi guys big time! We love licking and sucking the guy's cock together and kiss each other at the tip of the head : ) Lots of them are happily married with kids, but they do need to bonk other guys as well. It's amazing how many bi guys represent themselves as 'straight' when they are NOT. Bi guys are so much more versatile and greatly appreciated.Well, at least by us : ) I had 4 bi guys together and I was the only lady! That was majorly fantastic!! So, tell her. It'll be such a relief and you just might be pleasantly surprised. Good luck
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RHP User
15 years ago
Well, I am in an extremely happy relationship with a bi guy. Bi guys fall in love with women but not other men. They only need them for sex and maybe witty conversations. He was open with me from the very beginning and with my strict Catholic upbringing, I was more curious then shocked. After being on RHP for over 7months, I prefer bi guys big time! We love licking and sucking the guy's cock together and kiss each other at the tip of the head : ) Lots of them are happily married with kids, but they do need to bonk other guys as well. It's amazing how many bi guys represent themselves as 'straight' when they are NOT. Bi guys are so much more versatile and greatly appreciated.Well, at least by us : ) I had 4 bi guys together and I was the only lady! That was majorly fantastic!! So, tell her. It'll be such a relief and you just might be pleasantly surprised. Good luck
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RHP User
15 years ago
I'm quite happily in love with one of each. Really there ae no limitations on love. I agree with everything else you said though!! :) Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'funbinumbers' Well, I am in an extremely happy relationship with a bi guy. Bi guys fall in love with women but not other men. They only need them for sex and maybe witty conversations. ... I'm glad you've had such good experiences with your bi guy, funbinumbers. What you've said may be true of your bi guy but not of every bi guy. Many bi guys are bi in the sense that they're half-straight, half-gay, and they can fall in love with a man just as easily as a gay man can. That's not where I'm at, I'm not looking for a relationship with a man at all, but there are many out there who will be.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Well, I never thought of that. I sure can't fight it if he fell in love with another guy but I am willing to share. I have a big heart : ) Yes, we can be in love with more than one person at the same time.Thank goodness, he prefers women in the love department and I, only prefer men. what stumps me is us women have 2 orifices;being vagina and anus,but the guy only has 1 orifice, the anus. Why do men like to plug another man? WHY??
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RHP User
15 years ago
Ha! It's just occured to me! Guys have cocks!! I have an insertable dildo. It's nearly like a cock but I can vary the size of mine : ) Plus I have boobs too. That should be a positive. I'll have to ask my partner why he likes to bonk other guys. This forum is so much fun!!
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RHP User
15 years ago
and come back everyone knows your bi or at least bi-curious......well what to expect when you put it out there......at least i have contributed to the RHP community if nothing else. So as a number of people have pointed out I am getting ahead of myself and probably need to give a little head first and to that end I plan on doing so next weekend......that is D Day for me or perhaps would be better called my cock weekend.....actually that is to grandiose as it will be more like cock hour....what ever that is the weekend. And yes Stalky i will report back......only seems fair as i have thrown it out there. CoastCpl - were you both aware of the others bisexuality pre relationship or did it evolve? Re the woman i am enamouried with our conversations have yet to get this personal.......would push things along though if they did. Incidentally I have a had a number of flirts from women since this declaration......more than i got for the hetro profile i had up here...... ......speaking of profiles, Baygirl i will put up some pic and then i can start flirting with you :) adios amigos
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RHP User
15 years ago
Ouch..I hate to say this.. but in the name of an honest response to the posters question, it would bother me if a man I was interested in, confessed he was bi curious. I'm not sure to what degree. I have never had the opportunity to test it - i.e. would I not have a sexual relationship with him because of it. My initial gut reaction is.. hesitate. Why this is I'm not entirely sure. In social situations I have no issue with bisexuality..homosexuality...pan sexuality etc etc. It definitely reflects more on me and my fears/issues than with the person who is bi-curious or bisexual of course. All this being said, and as many of the posters have already noted - at the end of the day, it comes down to the person and I would sincerely hope for me, this would be the case too. Given the opportunity to meet a man who was bisexual or bi-curious and coming to know him, all my fears/issue would become inconsequential as I see 'him' and not the label. I hope whoever you meet, male or female - they see 'you' and your worth, and not just that part of you which is your sexual identity.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Hi Touchiefeely. You r right, i aggree, mmf is all about touching feeling and all in fun.I have had a few mmf on here and they have been really hot experiences for all concerned.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'funbinumbers' Ha! It's just occured to me! Guys have cocks!! I have an insertable dildo. It's nearly like a cock but I can vary the size of mine : ) Plus I have boobs too. That should be a positive. I'll have to ask my partner why he likes to bonk other guys. This forum is so much fun!! It's not a competition you know.... but you're right.. boobs and pussy are a most significant asset! :pIt seems to be typical that men fuck different to women... invariably I would say that it's a more aggressive environment.... but don't misunderstand me and go to town on your dude with a strap-on like there's no tomorrow.... unless of course, that's what he likes... men who have sex with men don't always like anal sex, some don't ever have anal sex.... some like to give but not receive and vice versa... some like giving blow jobs.. some only like receiving blow jobs... some just like to masturbate with other guys.... some just like to watch.... some like group sex... wrestling naked... gang bang scenarios... you name it.... hair fetishes, pigging, licking sweat... I mean... it's not as simple as sorting out lovers on the basis of their genital equipment or how many holes a person has got.
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RHP User
15 years ago
I've had a good ole' think about this one for a few days now, and I can't come up with a straight answer for me or for you. I would classify myself as the norm/average woman, so here has been my take on it (in my head LOL) . I'd happily have a bi-guy as a playmate, but can't be certain if Id be able to carry on a relationship?? Mainly because my headspace is no where near wanting a relationship right now anyway. But i've gone through the what ifs: what if i suddenly found myself madly in love with a bi-guy? What if he made me happier in bed than anyone else ever had before? (that can be pretty addictive stuff as we know) What if I found that it just worked, as in suited us both down to a T with out the madly in love side? .Then yes I guess I could. . . Then I went to the side of me that I know without the what ifs. I know that if I was in love with this man, I would want to be the one fulfilling every bit of his pleasure. And I think after a while it would eat at me, that there is an aspect of his sexuality that I could never fulfil. even if I knew he wasn't 'in love' with another man, i dont think it would stop me from feeling that way. . .. I know it doesn't make much sense in the end, because I absolutely adore a man/person who is open and self accepting of his/her sexuality Baahhh bloody crazy ass logic......lol
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'stalky'.... some like group sex... wrestling naked... gang bang scenarios... you name it.... hair fetishes, pigging, licking sweat... I mean... it's not as simple as sorting out lovers on the basis of their genital equipment or how many holes a person has got. I may have just had a moment there.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Boring_Name' I may have just had a moment there. lolz... did I mention docking? Muscle worship? piss play? edging? hehe... I mean, I could go on and on.... HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'dontgothere'Then I went to the side of me that I know without the what ifs. I know that if I was in love with this man, I would want to be the one fulfilling every bit of his pleasure. And I think after a while it would eat at me, that there is an aspect of his sexuality that I could never fulfil. even if I knew he wasn't 'in love' with another man, i dont think it would stop me from feeling that way. . .. I know it doesn't make much sense in the end, because I absolutely adore a man/person who is open and self accepting of his/her sexuality Actually that makes a whole lot of sense to me. I completely get it... and when in love that's probably what we all strive to achieve. I will say further that it also seems to be one of the principle motivations for couples to swing. Maybe we aren't capable of meeting every sexual desire of our one true love and for this reason we aren't meant to be monogamous after all.HugsStalky
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N4November
15 years ago
... men who have sex with men don't always like anal sex, some don't ever have anal sex.... some like to give but not receive and vice versa... some like giving blow jobs.. some only like receiving blow jobs... some just like to masturbate with other guys.... some just like to watch.... some like group sex... wrestling naked... gang bang scenarios... you name it.... hair fetishes, pigging, licking sweat... I mean... it's not as simple as sorting out lovers on the basis of their genital equipment or how many holes a person has got. My two bi playmates fall into this category - they both love to suck NOT fuck!! I wouldn't discourage them if they wanted to give that a go (I haven't seen guys fucking first hand) but what I truely love about playing with them is their ability to share and enjoy pleasure equally with me as with each other; its very very sexy. They are each masters of oral play and oh la la... what more can I say?! But what I find frustrating is the double standard that it is socially acceptable and encouraged by our society and mainstream media for women to be bi-sexual. Intellectually, its just not fair for men. I'm under no illusions that there will be straight men out there who view my profile and/or read my post and be turned off that I have played with bi-sexual men. Roguish, this is why I encourage you to explore your sexuality fully before labelling yourself bi-sexual. Men and women alike are turned off by bi-sexual men. No-one can rationalise it, thats just the way it is unfortunately....
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Roguish73' ...Incidentally I have a had a number of flirts from women since this declaration......more than i got for the hetro profile i had up here...... Bwahahaha! :D That's highly fantastic.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'stalky' Maybe we aren't capable of meeting every sexual desire of our one true love and for this reason we aren't meant to be monogamous after all. Well u just hit the nail on the head as to why I've always felt monogamy doesn't work for me Stalky - even if u did meet one person who met EVERY one of your needs, wants, interests and desires (OMFG that such a person could exist!) we all change throughout our life and regardless of what kind of relationship u r in what is more important is that the changes complement each other. Sometimes u change together, and sometimes your paths take different directions. It doesn't invalidate any of the time u spent together though - it all counts. :) Re: an earlier suggestion that the lovely ladies on RHP might not represent the typical female view - that might be a fair call (in my case anyway). I've been told frequently that my outlook is not that of a typical woman's - about a lot of things, not just sex, but altho the odds of finding someone who sees the world in the same way is small, I'd like to think that it's worth the effort anyway. I guess it really comes down to whether u r happy with someone who is like all the rest......*snore!* lol. Personally I'd rather find a kindred spirit - much more preferable to settling for someone who is pretty close or "he'll do". That's not to say u can't have fun in the meantime :D Glad 2 hear u r getting more flirts Roguish!!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Hey Baygirl, the double standard you describe completely exasperates me. How is it any different for a man to enjoy some bisexual fun vs a woman but such is life, it is full of double standards. The scenario you describe with your two bi-sexual friends sounds like lots of fun......my fantasy has always been to be in a foursome with with two females and males just letting loose together......maybe one day.....
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Krissy_G' If you havnt may I suggest that you read some of the posts about giving head and rimming. Absolutely enlightning. Do not offend people who are trying to give you an opinion. Baygirl :) Krissy Hey Krissy G, any relation to Kenny? Putting that to one side no i haven't had any screaming orgasms lately. I have been single since November and whilst i run a fairly vigorous self maintence programme, i am yet to reach such heights of pleasure.......not for lack of trying though :) But happy to read the forum for when i am get back in the game....one sex or the other. Re your comment about offending people I am not sure what that is referencing??? My exasperation around double standards perhaps? At best this is a fairly light emotion to an opinion fairly made. Actually I think the best posts are those that nicely balance opinion with emotion - they make for the best reading. However if i have offended I apologise. Now over to read givng head and rimming to read what I am missing out on and maybe I will be able to include it in my first male experience next weekend. Roguish
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RHP User
15 years ago
Hey Roguish I really want to wish you the best of luck with this, it must be one of those, exhilerating, nervous, exciting, crap your pants, 'god I hope its what I want' type of times for you ....LOL here's to hoping your first male experience is with a considerate, gentle (at times ;) hot sexy man and that it blows your mind with one of Krissy-G's screaming orgasms. . But if it doesn't pan out that way, re-asses how you feel and be very selective about your next encounter, sometimes we only know what we 'don't ' want after we've already put a foot through the door. . kinda excited for you mwah xx
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RHP User
15 years ago
We walk this earth just once and for a short time only. Don't spend precious time wondering - just go out and do it. If you find love with either sex then thats a bonus.Honesty is always a good policy to adopt when considering long term partners. If they can't accept your bisesexuality/curiosity then they aren't accepting you because that is part of you. A partner should not love you in spite of what you do but because of what you do.Good luck and hope you find joy in what you do.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'dontgothere' Hey Roguish I really want to wish you the best of luck with this, it must be one of those, exhilerating, nervous, exciting, crap your pants, 'god I hope its what I want' type of times for you ....LOL here's to hoping your first male experience is with a considerate, gentle (at times ;) hot sexy man and that it blows your mind with one of Krissy-G's screaming orgasms. . But if it doesn't pan out that way, re-asses how you feel and be very selective about your next encounter, sometimes we only know what we 'don't ' want after we've already put a foot through the door. . kinda excited for you mwah xxYep kinda excited and kinda nervous but am determined to go through with it......have wondered for too long!
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N4November
15 years ago
You're very quiet.... spill!!! You know you are going to have to share your first experience with us don't you?!! And yes, my two bi friends are delicious. They both surprised me last weekend with helping me out with a really difficult situation so I am humbled and totally blessed that I have them in my life. I'm thinking another bi mf couple would be fun to join us - I might put it to them but I don't see them saying no haahahah
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RHP User
15 years ago
I personally could be with a guy who is bi I'm Bi so why would it be different for my partner just because he is male.I think you should be honest with your partner male or female and most of all be honest with yourself. In the future if you don't pursue your curiosities and end up with a female partner this could end up with all sorts of issues like cheating, your partner feeling lied to or you feeling like you are not being yourself.GO for it be honest to your future partners Dont hold yourself back
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'baygirl2315' You're very quiet.... spill!!! You know you are going to have to share your first experience with us don't you?!! And yes, my two bi friends are delicious. They both surprised me last weekend with helping me out with a really difficult situation so I am humbled and totally blessed that I have them in my life. I'm thinking another bi mf couple would be fun to join us - I might put it to them but I don't see them saying no haahahah Hi Baygirl, yes have been quiet. Unfortunately life and particularly work has got in way of RHP..........i need to reassess my priorities! It also means that i didnt get my shit together re meeting up with a bloke this weekend. I have been chatting to someone re getting together for a few drinks and watching some porn together and a little mutual man maintence however i have only just got around to downloading some pics. He wants to see them first prior to meeting, which is fair enough. Speaking of which you can have a look at them to, then I cant start flirting with you again :) I saw you on the webcam the other night and you looked very hot. It would be lots of fun to play with you and your friends. Re my predilicitions I am think i am going to find that my bicuriousness is going to be relatively light but lets find out.
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RHP User
15 years ago
I am Bi and my wife is Bi we have our Profile as a cpl and our separate profiles. We play Bi or straight to and separately and we have no issues with our sexuality. There seems to be 2 conversations going in this thread, 1 having or not having a relationship with a Bi guy, and Bi ness (?) in a relationship. We started our relationship with secrets and it nearly, very nearly broke us up. Since we have both accepted my Bisexuality our sex life has grown and grown. We are still amazed that cpls are ok with Bi ladies but once they realise I am the chatting stops. Being Bi is not contagious, if you a re be happy and enjoy. Being Bi does not mean I will fall in love with a guy, Ladies are my preference, the guy part is absolute bonus for both of us All enjoy what ever persuausion you are and never judge
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cbdlivin
15 years ago
Quoting 'bobsol' I am Bi and my wife is Bi we have our Profile as a cpl and our separate profiles. We play Bi or straight to and separately and we have no issues with our sexuality. There seems to be 2 conversations going in this thread, 1 having or not having a relationship with a Bi guy, and Bi ness (?) in a relationship. We started our relationship with secrets and it nearly, very nearly broke us up. Since we have both accepted my Bisexuality our sex life has grown and grown. We are still amazed that cpls are ok with Bi ladies but once they realise I am the chatting stops. Being Bi is not contagious, if you a re be happy and enjoy. Being Bi does not mean I will fall in love with a guy, Ladies are my preference, the guy part is absolute bonus for both of us All enjoy what ever persuausion you are and never judge You have stated one of the standard issues as a couple if they suddenly see you are bi, people who were interested in playing with you as a couple suddenly disappear. I am glad to see you got rid of secrets in your relationship, hiding these things really hurt relationships but it can certainly make a relationship grow when its part of the relationship. I am seeing two woman who like the idea of me being bi. The idea of the MMF dynamic where wvertone is being pleasured in different ways, nothing better.
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RHP User
15 years ago
with younger ladies, i think you will find they dont want you hooking up with guys, then coming to them for some lady lovin' - so to speak..this is probably more the norm for girls under the age of 30. However, as per the above replies - more mature ladies will be happy with a guy who is open about his sexuality like this... waiting for some young ladies to comment..
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RHP User
15 years ago
Topic is still going.......my plans fell through last week.....bloke i was chatting to i think was more interested in the chat than catching up........funnily enough since i have got it off my chest here it has gone of lost resonance with me......and at the moment am just so focused on the ladies............could be worse affilications to have.....
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N4November
15 years ago
call me
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RHP User
15 years ago
heartbeat.............you just need to send me your number.....:)
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cbdlivin
15 years ago
Quoting 'Roguish73'heartbeat.............you just need to send me your number.....:) Roguish, damn with the devine Baygirl saying that I have to say well damn lucky so and so :-)
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RHP User
15 years ago
Or you might regret it later, like I'm regretting a few missed opportunities.
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