M47

One...two...three...

April 24 2014

Ok it's like 4:52am and I can't fricken sleep thanks to an overdose of coffee and porn. So I'm sitting here twiddling my thumbs, and a few tissues and Emily Hartridge - who I might add is going to be my next wife; even if she doesn't know it yet - came to my attention. Yep both heads ;) So I thought I would borrow her idea - and subsequent fame for it too - and write a 10 reasons why thread.... So the topic of today's 10 reasons why....is why Internet dating is so much fun.. 1. Internet dating is fun because I can be whomever the fuck I want to be. Let's face it, if you had the ability to hide your everyday boring as batshit life routine like waking up with morning wood eyeing off the next door neighbours cat, you would. Everyone at some point likes to escape themselves. So if I wanna be batman with his trusty black cape that never gets caught in elevators, never needs dry cleaning, doubles up as a good tool to drag a woman off to the batcave; is scotch guarded against cum stains, repels STI/STD's then fuck it I am. Let's not forget his toolbelt right girls?? ;) 2. Internet dating is fun because I can just sit here and laugh my arse off at the way people write their profiles, and no one can find out. We've all seen that profile/profile pic that we just think "what on earth have they put in there??" Or "mmmmm I wonder what that tastes like, likes it's a new delicacy" Then there the ones that no matter which way you rotate your screen you still can't figure out what on earth the photo is. I mean for all we know it could be a vampire's tea bag pressed between two dirty diapers!!! Ok....my secret is out eh?? ;) 3. Internet dating is fun, as I can scroll on to the next profile with just a quick swipe!!! Until you realise some kid at the local maccas is looking over your shoulder when you see a cock shot or pussy pic. That's kinda funny if they ask you what it is ;) The concussion not so much much if you actually do tell them what it is :p 4. Internet dating is fun because it's like going to a restaurant to eat. You have this whole menu of people to eat like you've just come off the 40hr famine. Yes you can even have fries with that ;) 5. Internet dating is fun because it's cheap. Let's be honest....for most of the women, they can just sit back there on their little tuffets like little miss muffet, have uber amounts of men parade in front of them flashing their dicks like they've just bought a new pet and they wanna play with it....they want YOU to play with it....AND you don't even need to lift a finger. I'd call it dial-a-fuck but it's more like the Efuck....shhhhh don't be spreading the word as apple might release a sex doll called the iFuck!! :p. Although, sometimes I think they already did but they called it "iPhone" lol ;) 6. Internet dating is fun because everyone that's signed up, has already answered your first question!!! "What are you looking for?" Well....that's easy eh?? I mean you're never going to get someone looking to buy a car right?? Though given the presence of the jack rabbit, some people would drive anything given half the chance ;) 7. Internet dating is fun as it can make a holiday pretty Fucken cheap for accommodation lol. This one I think is pretty self explanatory. 8. Internet dating is fun because no matter how hard it is to meet someone offline due to your busy schedule, there's always someone that's always logged in... Lol 9. Internet dating is fun, which is more than what I can say about taxes!!! In comparison, just about anything is more fun than paying taxes right?? ;) Except spiders.....fuck spiders!!! 10. And lastly but not at all leastly internet dating is fun because there's no hidden contracts!!! As I talk about in my profile, we live in the prepaid era. We have prepaid phones, internet, all the way to fricken funerals!!! If you don't want to talk to someone you can just stop, until they've inserted a few more coins into the slot!! Wait....what??? You wanna put what where?? Ok that's it for this thread, until next time when I may just release another shameless self promoting thread talking about how good you'll all love my cock, or even just to get a few more views on my profile ;) lol Be kind to each other :) - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

12 years ago

Couldn't count past 3 sheep? You're not a New Zealander are you?!! :P - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

12 years ago

Bahahahaha By the time I got to three my pants were already off and I was donning the Velcro gloves ;) - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

12 years ago

of the insomniac...the stupid shit that goes through your head Better luck for a good sleep tonight

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madotara69

12 years ago

you can be Friar Trucker for all I care ............./\./\ Mado /``\ (black ears and matching cape) ........|...\.^./...| ......./....|.B|....\ ...../...../......\.....\ Inernet dating is cool, cos when we feel like a fuck, we can Mado Tara xx

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RHP User

12 years ago

Sir if internet dating is so much fun why the hell are you alone at 4 am whatching porn and pulling yourself stupid ??? - Posted from rhpmobile

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MsSuperFoxy

12 years ago

cause you get to meet arsholes who speak arsholian! Foxy, who's proud because she learnt a 3rd language!

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RHP User

12 years ago

I never said I was alone ;) *cough3sherpcough* :p - Posted from rhpmobile

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Lovinit28andKC72

12 years ago

Well at least you're my favorite arsehole, probably should throw in frustrating and funny arsehole, but still my favorite nevertheless,,,,,💋 get some sleep for fucks sake...... Foxy But as well as arseholes, you get meet some extremely interesting, entertaining and awesome people too.....💋 - Posted from rhpmobile

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MsSuperFoxy

12 years ago

I have met some truly amazing, extremely interesting, entertaining and awesome people! They certainly do, out number the arssholes! Foxy

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RHP User

12 years ago

Carbon dating is even funner r:-) :-) xx C

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RHP User

12 years ago

You open the door to chance and who knows who will come through it. - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

12 years ago

Carbon dating is the new black ;) - Posted from rhpmobile

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