F44
Rejection Reactions
May 02 2013
Comments
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RHP User
13 years ago
I've tried so many knock back messages, none of them nasty. Most guys are happy to just get a response, even if it is a thanks but no thanks. Others just can't handle being told no and flip out. Just hit the block button for those :)- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Knock back probably wasn't the best term to use.. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hi.......Thank you for your message and I appreciate the time you have taken to write to me. Unfortunately you are not what I am seeking. May I ask you please respect my decision as I would yours. :-) Once again thank you and enjoy your time on RHP. If they come back with abuse... BLOCK
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RHP User
13 years ago
Now I could be way off here. But for those who have low self esteem, or have a higher insecurity level, they need to blame something for success in order to cope with the rejection....the thing is, do you owe them that??? NOPE!!! Their vitriolic responses are just egos talking, if the boot was on the other foot, they'd say no if the person messaging them wasn't what THEY wanted. Personally, I see rejection as it is....honesty, and how could that be a bad thing???- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Insert "lack of" before success- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
it just wouldn't matter what you wrote OP,angry people are angry people.Just a moment ago I received an abusive email from a man who I briefly chatted to on another site....I do think, that quite often the anger is fuelled by alcohol.
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RHP User
13 years ago
either interested or you're not.Honesty is the best thing someone could ask for, especially on a website such as rhp.You have the power to be more direct on here than you do in reality. And for most, thats a positive.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I have never received a negative response when I have said no to someone. Except for when I have been a bitch, which has happened a handful Of times over three years. My template is more lengthy and friendly, more personable. I think your message can be interpreted as a little abrupt. Put yourself in their shoes, what would you like to receive in return if you sent a man you were really keen on a message and he rejected you?
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RHP User
13 years ago
If you are getting a lot of knock backs it must be very disheartening. I also say it's nothing personal but you are not my type, but I wish you luck and hope you find what you are looking for..... Something like that.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' If you are getting a lot of knock backs it must be very disheartening. I also say it's nothing personal but you are not my type, but I wish you luck and hope you find what you are looking for..... Something like that. If you're getting an abundance of knockbacks its clear you're not trying enough or trying too hard. The best thing about rhp is that you can see right through people and their intentions. Genuine real people are hard to find. Matching with them and actually physically meeting them is the reward for your methods in getting their interest. In rhp's case, the words you use and how calm and collected you are.Desperation stinks, even though a computer screen.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Probably wouldn't worry too much about it - as long as it's polite and well worded, that's probably enough. I'm guessing you're always going to get a select few coming back with abuse anyway, regardless of what you write.
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RHP User
13 years ago
We all have individual tastes, an therefore will not be interested/attracted to everyone that msgs us. I personally am happy to get a knock back when the person bothers to show the same respect and friendliness as I used in msging them to begin with.- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
a social worker, the template your using is just fine. The fact that you even bother let alone fret about it elevates you above 95% of the women here.As others have said just block and move on, it's not your problem.
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RHP User
13 years ago
And start again ,its all about consistency hahah sorry could not resist.I am usually the one getting knocked back ,but i keep my head up and roll on !Also sent the message back saying "thank you" to the knockeee for replying back to my message and wish them the best in life lust and love.No one likes a sour lemon
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RHP User
13 years ago
i dont mind if i sent a flirt or mesaage and get areply of no thanks,,but what gets up my nose is those people that are happy to exchange messages for few days or more ,sya we have a lot in commom or looking for the same things and then sudden send the ... your not my type or not what im looking for or to really take the cake .because people change user names and profile ,you discover you"ve play before and they hit you with ..i dont go over old ground..what a crock of shit .and i keep getting told this was good place to meet people and make friends..
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sweetgem
13 years ago
It really doesn't matter how and what you write in your reply if you've run into a bad mannered uneducated person/people, especially those who are alcoholic, their brains work differently lol However, having said that, I think attitude and tone of voice show in your replied message also play an important part in your approach and how people would receive the message. Don't worry VioletLover, you will build your own "Great Wall" after a month you've been on here :-)
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RHP User
13 years ago
oops this is not her wall
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RHP User
13 years ago
As innerwest123 said so eloquently in his guide @ http://www.redhotpie.com.au/Adult-Forums/The-definitive-guide-for-average-guys-on-RHP-40317 step 4 4. BE POLITE WHEN FACED WITH REJECTION/IGNORING.The ratio of men/women on the site would be staggeringly huge. I don't know what it is, but I am absolutely certain that this ratio would put the worlds largest gangbang to shame. By and large (and yes, I am aware that this statement ins't 100% true), the woman you are messaging is being messaged/flirted with by literally hundreds of other guys. To answer all of this is a literal full-time job. You stand a better chance of getting a reply when you write a nice message, but even then, the girls are snowed under. Empathise with this, because it's a lot to deal with, especially as - apparently - a lot of the messages are far, far less than savoury. It sucks not getting a reply, and has certainly frustrated me in the past, but heres a big protip for you:Suck it up, princess. Deal with it. Be an adult, and move on.If you message someone and they are kind enough to take the trouble to say (or even copy/paste): "Thanks for the message, but I am not interested, best of luck", or the like, be a man, a grown-up man and message them back to thank them for the reply, and move on. Help foster the behaviour of replying to messages. DO NOT REPLY WITH SOME SNARKY, PETULANT, PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE REPLY - DOING THIS MAKES YOU A DOUCHEBAG. DON'T BE A DOUCHEBAG.I wholeheartedly agree :-)
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RHP User
13 years ago
As some people do have issues for some reason or another and nothing would appease them, so just do what you think is right without getting to caught up in their emotional blackmail, or literal abuse, if they can't take rejection and you have done it in the best possible and respectful way then they are not respecting your right to refuse - it is their problem not yours. You don't have to go into great detail as to why.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I think your reply is fine. It doesn't matter how flowery you make it, there will always be those that just can't handle rejection. They are the minority though...most are thankful that you do at least reply, as many don't. And for those that come back asking why, remember that you don't owe them any explanation for your decision. However, I have had a couple guys who have nicely asked for feedback on their profile and how it could be improved, and I'm happy to respond in that case.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Rejection is a part of life.You go to a resutaurant and ask for the special only to be told shortly thereafter that its sold out.What do you do.... rage at the waiter, chef and staff?!Hell No...... You DEAL WITH IT.... and make another selection.And if someone cant handle YOUR selection process because it doesnt involve them..... BLOCK. Saves reading the rantings of insecurity. DG
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's nice to get a reply even though if it's a no because it feels like I am being treated as a person and respect.There are always people who don't take rejection well. The best way is to ignore it. There is a saying 'If a dog barks don't bark back, because there will be two dogs."But I think it's reasonable if he asks why he is being rejected, because this sort of information may actually guide the person into a right direction eg. profile not complete, too short, not your type, too old etc. If you ignore, the person may think that you are being prejudice and may take the rejection too personal. Imagine you want to get into a bar but you aren't allowed into- you would warrant for an explanation to why you are being prohibited. Once you are told, the next time when you go to a similar bar you'd act in a different way to what was previously prohibited. This will actually help people understand why their profiles aren't working or being ignored.Also one phrase that I am very curious about- 'I have to choose who I think I'll have a connection with'. I once received a rejection saying 'There is no chemistry'. What I am curious about is 1. Connection is something that you build after you have interacted with someone, for example chatting and getting to know each other- then you can say you feel connected with him. Usually they are ideas, emotions, and past experiences. How do you judge or feel connected with someone from just reading their profile or reading one message (assuming that you hadn't exchange multiple emails prior). The same go to chemistry- it is something that requires interaction, face-to-face- how do you know whether there is chemistry or not from just reading and seeing picture?I think the word you want to use is 'Attraction'.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' I have never received a negative response when I have said no to someone. Except for when I have been a bitch, which has happened a handful Of times over three years. My template is more lengthy and friendly, more personable. I think your message can be interpreted as a little abrupt. Put yourself in their shoes, what would you like to receive in return if you sent a man you were really keen on a message and he rejected you? I like your response and that's what we need more. Try to put your self in their shoes and treat people the way you want to be treated.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Imagine when you were little there are a bunch of kids running around in the play ground having fun, and you want to join them- but when you asked to play with them they just look at you and say no. How frustrating would you feel to be singled out and isolated over and over. Psychologically this can be traumatizing, causing kids to become withdraw from social interactions. Now, we adults have learned and understand that these things do happen so we learn to cope with it. But repeatedly, the experience does accumulate which causes them to react in a certain way eg. being rude as a defense mechanism. Social behavior and interaction is much more complicated that most people think they understand. A lot of times people aren't rude just because they are rude or crazy because they are crazy, there are reasons behind it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Rejection is a part of life.You go to a resutaurant and ask for the special only to be told shortly thereafter that its sold out. I don't think you can compare that to human interaction which has to do with psychosocial setting.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Wow thanks for all the comments. I will try a different reply for those I am not interested in meeting and see if that works. In regards to them asking why I am not interested and wanting me to go into detail about it, I would be ok with doing this but I get quite a few like that and I simply don't have time to do that for several people a week. I wish I could because I do put myself in their shoes. But I barely get to reply to and meet the people who message me that I am interested in :/ So many sexy awesome people, so little time! ;) I guess I just have to keep being polite but firm. It can get a bit overwhelming but it's worth it, I have met and am looking forward to meeting a few people I've come into contact with on here :) Am enjoying rediscovering my sexual freedom this year! Love my dirty '30s :P- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Dieselnoi' Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Rejection is a part of life.You go to a resutaurant and ask for the special only to be told shortly thereafter that its sold out. I don't think you can compare that to human interaction which has to do with psychosocial setting. Of course you can.In both cases..... psychology dictates your response to the perceived problem.And in both cases, food, or the person saying 'no'..... are not an option thats available to you.Knowing why.... rarely makes a difference because its not going to change the situation there and then.DG
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RHP User
13 years ago
I get a lot of guys coming back asking why not & how they can improve their profile. Umm not here to hold your hand!!?? I even get messages from flirt 'no thanks' I have sent asking why not? Now blocking is great & all but it doesn't stop you receiving flirts from them no matter hiw many reject replies you send them!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
That if the person is really sleazy in their message I tend to not always be nice in my reply. Someone has to tell them!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'curves21' I get a lot of guys coming back asking why not & how they can improve their profile. Umm not here to hold your hand!!?? I even get messages from flirt 'no thanks' I have sent asking why not? Now blocking is great & all but it doesn't stop you receiving flirts from them no matter hiw many reject replies you send them!! I've blocked a few people who wouldn't stop sending me flirts after I'd told them no thanks, and I haven't received anymore flirts from them since so I'm not sure why you would still be getting them...
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Quoting 'Dieselnoi' Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Rejection is a part of life.You go to a resutaurant and ask for the special only to be told shortly thereafter that its sold out. I don't think you can compare that to human interaction which has to do with psychosocial setting. Of course you can.In both cases..... psychology dictates your response to the perceived problem.And in both cases, food, or the person saying 'no'..... are not an option thats available to you.Knowing why.... rarely makes a difference because its not going to change the situation there and then.DG But food is an object, if it's out of stock it means that it's not there- therefore you are requesting for something that's not there, it's like sending email to an empty profile but not getting a response. Whereas being rejected by a profile is being rejected by something that you know is available.It's like you asking someone for a million dollar. In one setting he doesn't give it to you because he doesn't have it, in another setting he has it but he doesn't want to give it to you. The difference is when the object is not there the situation is forced and no one can do anything about it, in the other hand the outcome is influenced by a decision making. Knowing the reason may not change the outcome, but it may change the preceptor responses to the rejections.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Deep down i only want to meet the people that want to meet me! everybody wants to be desired, but the reality is that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, for this site to work it requires open minded mature people who are comfortable enough within themselves to meet like minded people and have fun.... I think a template response is still a nice way of getting back to someone! it is still an acknowlegdement of your initial interest. Guys that are nasty when they get negative a response from a girl, ruin this expirience for all the genuine guys on here as in the long run all the women on here will end up extremely guarded:(
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RHP User
13 years ago
I'd be more than happy to receive that reply. I just wish more RHP members would send a reply. Thank you. So many members don't even acknowledge a message. Please don't be put off by a few that can't accept rejection.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Huh?!lolDG
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'bpleased2eatyou'i dont mind if i sent a flirt or mesaage and get areply of no thanks,,but what gets up my nose is those people that are happy to exchange messages for few days or more ,sya we have a lot in commom or looking for the same things and then sudden send the ... your not my type or not what im looking for or to really take the cake .because people change user names and profile ,you discover you"ve play before and they hit you with ..i dont go over old ground..what a crock of shit .and i keep getting told this was good place to meet people and make friends.. things change while people are 'getting to know others', and as people become more relaxed, things begin to appear...like 'honesty'....and sometimes comments are made or attitudes revealed, that make people less attractive than we initially thought...it happens....and we don't revisit someone we've played with either..... its not what we seek....a big part of the thrill...for us, and for others too, we imagine, is the thrill of the 'new'.....and once we've been there...the appeal is lost......as for it being a place to meet 'friends'....well yea it is, but why does sex need to be involved in that friendship?
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RHP User
13 years ago
just be polite and honest....but be aware tho, that there are those who are so full of self entitlement that they cant cope with rejection.........of any kind. we know, we've had people so upset with our polite and gentle rejections, that its spilled over into the forums, into nasty messages to inboxes, and at one point, into continued telephone harassment. its sad, but it happens.......
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RHP User
13 years ago
Everything Mischeviouslad said about dealing with rejection is spot on, a "Sorry, but no" is perfectly acceptable and polite. I wouldn't even think to ask someone "why not?" face to face, even after what may have been a great night, because (to me) even put politely it comes across as badgering, judgemental, confrontational, and egotistical. It's also a warning sign that someone will not take no as an answer. There's a profile advice forum - use it.Like your average guy I've been rejected so many times but I've never let it get me down - it's just my outlook on life. I don't put myself out there that often or message many people, but I'd prefer someone being honest and upfront rather than strung along by someone only half interested or simply bored. I've rejected a few people looking for a playmate, most because I get the feeling they haven't read my profile (I've definitely read theirs) and know there's no way we'd be compatible. One of the last few, however, I had to say no to because she looked so so much like my sister it was scary. How do you explain that without making things awkward? There's no doubt we'd get on really well, but I just couldn't take it beyond friends without being grossed out.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Dieselnoi' Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Quoting 'Dieselnoi' Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Rejection is a part of life.You go to a resutaurant and ask for the special only to be told shortly thereafter that its sold out. I don't think you can compare that to human interaction which has to do with psychosocial setting. Of course you can.In both cases..... psychology dictates your response to the perceived problem.And in both cases, food, or the person saying 'no'..... are not an option thats available to you.Knowing why.... rarely makes a difference because its not going to change the situation there and then.DG But food is an object, if it's out of stock it means that it's not there- therefore you are requesting for something that's not there, it's like sending email to an empty profile but not getting a response. Whereas being rejected by a profile is being rejected by something that you know is available.It's like you asking someone for a million dollar. In one setting he doesn't give it to you because he doesn't have it, in another setting he has it but he doesn't want to give it to you. The difference is when the object is not there the situation is forced and no one can do anything about it, in the other hand the outcome is influenced by a decision making. Knowing the reason may not change the outcome, but it may change the preceptor responses to the rejections. Sorry, but I really think that if somebody needs to be 'babied' in this way in the rejection they receive, and always requires a detailed explanation of why they were rejected to stop them throwing a tantrum, then they really shouldn't be on a site like this or any other sex / dating site. And I'm well aware of the types of underlying issues that could be causing these negative reactions to rejection and I still think the same, possibly even more so. Also, you cannot compare the case of someone having a million dollars and not wanting to give it to someone, to the case of a person not being interested in potential sexual liaisons with another person. For the most part, people on here are not 'purposely' witholding sex or the possibility of having sex just to fuck with the other person's head or be cruel (of course yes there are some low lives who play games and probably do this). Generally it is because they are simply not interested, and they are perfectly within their rights to not be interested. They don't owe their time or their body to anyone on here, and hence they don't owe the other party a novel explaining why they have decided to not give them those things. Yes, if the approacher has a question about their profile and whether there's anything there that could be improved then that's fair enough. But if they have received a polite reply saying basically thankyou but no thanks, then continuing to badger the other party about it and call them names etc. is just childish.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Maybe cause I am a guest and not a paying member but absolutely if I block they still send me einks that I receive. Ignoring them makes then send you more. Saying no & nnoooo reply stops them for a little while then it starts ago. I even choose to block again & again & it keeps happening.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Lets face it to be able to enjoy yourself there has to be a certain how is it put chemistry or attraction. If it's not there then a polite template such as she used should be fine. What we find upsetting is those people who initiate contact with a message or a flirt then when you reply either take a week to reply. Something along the line of what we use such as we both have to check out wyour profile, we will be in touch is best.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Just look at mikeandshel's profile it is very well done, anyone outside their parameters knows automatically that they will be rejected. Probably makes it easy for them to write the rejections. We don't have a template for it but are going to now use what we learned and make one.
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RHP User
13 years ago
... I wouldn't sweat it too much - when you are faced with the situation of a guy being abusive or petulant or whatever after you have given them a 'thanks but no thanks', it clearly shows you were right to say no to them. If they can't conduct themselves like reasonable humans via text, what the fuck are they like in person?
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RHP User
13 years ago
BUT........I think that (some) people who do the rejecting actually want, and seek out to attain those radical reactions.....just to reafirm to themselves that they "really ARE that good" ie, just look at how the rejected reacted, they were devastated and driven to such uncharacteristic behaviour(s)........Internally it registers as: fukk, I'm/we're so hot, desired and sought afterAND........I also think that they may even get a kick out of posting up the rejections....again to BIG themselves up in their own, and in the readers eyes.....and, If (fingers crossed) the rejected publicly replies to the posts.....hey, MAX RESULT.....that's the BIGGEST "big-up" everIt's a microcosm........a strange and UNreal one at that, where people believe what they want to believe, and will endeavour to make everyone else believe it tooThe "Look-at ME" culture strikes again~~anachronistic f~~
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RHP User
13 years ago
You have your points. I can see how it can become badgering or childish to ask why they are being rejected. I only think we'd have a better community if we initiate communication so we can have mutual understanding. So rather than leaving one or the other come up with their own conclusions and start a forum complaining why they're being ignored over and over again.There was a time when I was rejected by a profile and I was told that it's because my profile indicated I was bisexual. It was nice that I was told, so i went and fix it. So it doesn't have to be a novel, maybe one sentence is enough. Another time I asked a person why she hated me so much, she said I was too young- ok that's fair so we started chatting about other subjects subsequently developing into a plutonic relationship.I guess it depends on how you look at it. I find it more mature if we communicate as adults rather than being quiet and ignore someone merely because you think they are not attractive. Overall I think it's a nice thing to respond to people when they want your opinion, but I guess most probably think they're not here to 'be nice' neither. If that's the case then why are we complaining when people are rude, since they're not here to be nice then rudeness should be expected.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Mariko01'Just look at mikeandshel's profile it is very well done, anyone outside their parameters knows automatically that they will be rejected. Probably makes it easy for them to write the rejections. We don't have a template for it but are going to now use what we learned and make one. but it doesn't work.. people don't read profiles, that's a long established and oft proven fact. all the conditions, preferences or even exclusions amount for nothing, if people continually ignore the words, and respond only to the pictures...or even to the 'idea' of contact and play. we fend off advances from married guys, daily, from 20 something's, daily, and so forth. we ask.....'did you read our profile?'.......and so often, the answer is .....'no'? people are the way they are, because their experience tells them it works, or because they are too self absorbed and oblivious to give a damn.... we say 'no thanks but good luck' in 3 dozen different ways..to people (generally men) who we see no value in meeting...or who are outside of what we seek.. and what happens? we cop flak for being.......'time wasters' ........ 'fakes'......... etc....
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RHP User
13 years ago
I have no issue with a "Sorry, you're not what I'm looking for, good luck with your search". And will send a reply along the lines of "thanks for at least the courtesy of replying, and do as you say & leave it at that. What ruffles my feathers a bit is the total ignorance of some people & their lack of people skills in NOT replying at all. In which case I will usually send a follow up message of "dont bother your far to ignorant for my liking" it may not be the best approach but it is effective from screening out the wankers, idiots & fakes on here. And on the subject of been ignored I dont get ignored in RL, some of that may be that I am 6'6" and have a shear physical presence, some might be that I project a bit of personality or charisma and I do bring some of that online with me. But again its a effective screening tool & if you dont get that about me online you really wont get me in person. So to the women that have blocked me, thanks as its more your loss then mine.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Dieselnoi' You have your points. I can see how it can become badgering or childish to ask why they are being rejected. I only think we'd have a better community if we initiate communication so we can have mutual understanding. So rather than leaving one or the other come up with their own conclusions and start a forum complaining why they're being ignored over and over again.There was a time when I was rejected by a profile and I was told that it's because my profile indicated I was bisexual. It was nice that I was told, so i went and fix it. So it doesn't have to be a novel, maybe one sentence is enough. Another time I asked a person why she hated me so much, she said I was too young- ok that's fair so we started chatting about other subjects subsequently developing into a plutonic relationship.I guess it depends on how you look at it. I find it more mature if we communicate as adults rather than being quiet and ignore someone merely because you think they are not attractive. Overall I think it's a nice thing to respond to people when they want your opinion, but I guess most probably think they're not here to 'be nice' neither. If that's the case then why are we complaining when people are rude, since they're not here to be nice then rudeness should be expected. not saying they should be ignored...of course that is rude and there should be some form of polite reply sent whether the answer is yay or nay. But as to your example of you changing your profile because it said you were bisexual, I am a bit confused about that. If you are actually bisexual, surely you wouldn't change your profile just to try and gain the approval of / hook up with this one person who has a problem with it?? Even if it was a mistake on your part when filling out your profile, people who are actually bisexual can't change that. And that's the thing...a lot of the time the thing/s that someone doesn't find attractive about another person are going to be things that the other person can't really change (or shouldn't be trying to change). Yes as in your example about your age being a problem you went on to develop a friendship, and that's great as in that case the woman was ok with telling you why she said no and continuing the communication. And I don't have any issue with that, if people are ok with doing that then of course that's up to them. And the key point there is that it is up to them, and if they don't want to reply with an elaborate explanation or continue to send messages back and forth then that's their prerogative. Just chalk it up and move on. And again I'm not talking so much about instances where people ask for feedback on their profile, that's a different thing which I think is reasonable and actually constructive.
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RHP User
13 years ago
As I rarely receive a response. A polite thanks but no thanks is fine, at least it's a response. Though I am starting to see a few scammers come through as they quickly give out there msn or yahoo... Jetx
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RHP User
13 years ago
Only ever had two personal degrading comments from a person who I contacted,which commented on size etc,which I found rather amusing,didn't bite just politely told them what a great sense of humour they had,every other lady has been polite which I respect,they have taken time to read and respond,so to all you girls thank you,manners are free to which the majority on this site do have Andy- Posted from rhpmobile
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ma2518
13 years ago
when you have a head like mine you get used to it so you just dust yourself off and get back on the horse and try again as they say if at first you dont succeed.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I do not get my nose put out of joint because a woman does not reply. And if she sends a "no thanks etc", I will reply with a "thank you for your reply and have lots of fun". I sometimes find that they have blocked me but again, doesn't bother me. The good news is that I have twice been "referred" lol and have subsequently found another sexy woman to play with. So, like in RL, I am always polite and I move on. Plenty of beautiful and desirable women on RHP.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I think it's nice to get a response regardless of the outcome....Whatever happened to simple things like manners and etiquette? So many people forget both these days and don't realise it also applies to interaction online!!Besides why do these people insist on wasting your time and theirs....you aren't interested....thousands of other people to chat to and meet! Your template is fine....start working that block button sista!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
That is an interesting take Puzzled. It never occurred to me that some people actually want to get strong responses. I guess it could be a power game to them. They do it because they can without any consequences to themselves.I personally like a response, even a negative one. I can then move on and won't disturb that person. As mentioned in this forum, it also shows that the person rejecting looks at me as a human being, with dignity and respect. I will always repay the same to that person.Diesel, I find that most people only get one chance. You must be very lucky, message nice people or very good at phrasing your reply to get a second response. Getting feedback is great as it helps to improve the profile. You can't please everyone, but just enough to please the person you want to meet. Violet, there are many personalities out there. Some might be nice people who respect your decision, some might be nice people who had a horrible day, e.g. sick relative, pet died, tough day at work and the rejection was the straw that broke the camel's back, some just are rude people, and some are just drunk or high on drugs. You will get a different reaction from people, no matter how you respond. Just remember that it is not personal. They don't know you, you don't know them. If you don't like their response, move on. At the end of the day, you want to have a good time with someone who treats you well. Don't accept anything else.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Love getting messages back even if it is just a no. At least then I know they've read it. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Craig317' Love getting messages back even if it is just a no. At least then I know they've read it. - Posted from rhpmobile Open your "sent " folders.... you'll see if winks/mail have been viewedDG
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RHP User
13 years ago
i suppose it could be compared to going for a job interview, you appreciate people getting back to you, what ever the result. I guess people overlook the fact that, the majority of people on here are ordinary people who you wouldn't pick on the street! I see RHP as an outlet for mature people to feel comfortable expressing themselves in what society at large deems unacceptable! its a shame really, i guess the msg is just be respectful whatever side of the equation you find yourself on, lets all just have fun god knows life is hard enough without ppl giving you grief
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RHP User
13 years ago
...that I had time to reply to everyone :( Not blowing my own horn, I know it's only because I am a female on here, but sometimes I literally get up to 50 messages a week. It's impossible to reply to all of those when you work full time and are busy...even if it's a short reply! Some slip through the cracks... I hope that those I can't reply to can understand that if I could, I would.Not only that, I can't text/chat/message or meet with everyone that messages me...can you imagine?? It would be work, chat to RHP people, meet RHP people, fuck RHP people, work, repeat.... haha :P
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hi, Ok I'm fairly new to RHP (actually this is my very first post on the forums, so 'Him), sadly my experience so far has been that I don't get any reply. Which is worse, so I'm impressed that you do. What could be causing the comebacks is that you are using the template, that it just seems a bit ... insincere, of course with some people any rejection will cause them to come back at you.
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RHP User
13 years ago
For what it's worth I would advise the following template... Thank you for showing sexy interest in my profile. You're the bestest. However due to recent medical results my doctor has advised me that I should avoid any "intimate" contact with individuals at least until the first round of penicillin and antibotics have been completed. If you are a past parnter I advise you see your GP or Sexual Health clinic as a priority and avoid sexual contact at this time. I have been assured that as long as I continue to take the medications on an ongoing basis there is no risk to public health nor will there be any outwardly visible signs of my condition. Once everything is "cleaned up" I'd be more than happy to consider your delightful suggestions. I can't imagine too many contacting you again after that but no system is ever perfect.
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's very hard as a single man on these sites. The constant rejection does get a guy down but you just have to move on. A guy can't expect to walk into a crowded bar & expect a date with every woman there. If a guy gets abusive as a result of a rejection he's obviously a fuckwit & not worth meeting.If I send out 20 emails a day for 5 days in a row I'm lucky if I get 5 replies of any sort. I either accept that & put myself out there again or move on to eee harmonee or some other crap site or get mad at the world. I accept it, re-cast & move on. I know there are good people on this site & even though I often feel like single disposable guy I'd rather be told straight up that it's not going to happen than be strung along for sometimes months, just to get no where.To all the fuckwit guys who are abusive I say thanks, you make me look real good. To the ladies & couples, just say thanks no but thanks. That's all you need to say
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RHP User
13 years ago
The "Block" button is your friend :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
I just send to busy right now and hey I am some people hate feeling rejected men more than women. just ignore them
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RHP User
13 years ago
I disagree with that. Most women don't put themselves out there that often to get rejected, so not sure you can assume that they handle rejection well. If you are talking after a relationship breakup? Yes I think woman are stronger and recover much more quickly than men when a woman has broken up with them. Well that is also a conclusion I have made based on my limited knowledge.
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