F43
Responses to messages - can you take a knock back?
February 05 2013
Comments
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hi, From my point of veiw a reply even if it does say no thanks is much better than no response at all. While I unbderstand that the girls on here must get more messages than they no what to do with a quick thanks but no thanks would be a vast improvement on the current state of play. If someonr does say no thanks I send them a message thanking them for responding, I do not see the point in taking it to heart. Take care, Jeremy
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RHP User
13 years ago
I must have heard from the same guy "f'd in the head" "retarded". Do these people have a place in your life...no. Glad I said no. Glad to delete. Don't worry about it! Replying is the polite thing to do if someone has an issue with communication then they need to work on it.- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
It lets us know where we stand and it's polite. Sometimes we will respond with a polite "no worries, have fun" note, but I see no reason why anyone should take offense to a polite knock back. I could understand somewhat if the knock back was rudely worded as you'd feel like "well F*** you too!" But there are the crazies out there and I think you may have stumbled across one.
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RHP User
13 years ago
32_a_party... I definitely know what you're talking about. Some men can't take no for an answer and no matter how level headed one can be, it sometime can get under one's skin. He surely is a loser or psychopath who has gotten too many no's that he cracked. Take comfort that there are many other hot and courteous guys out there who will find you. ;)
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RHP User
13 years ago
I wrote a posting about this. I would have sent you the link but I can't find the thread..But basically, if you can't take a knock back graciously, your Man Licence is revoked!!Oh.. And i'd not legitimize someones nasty behaviour with a response. So he actually did you a favour with the blocking. We've all been blocked. It says more about them than you. Don't worry about it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
block him just delete any messages that he sends you.You could also report him to RHP for abuse. Unfortunately some people have insecure over inflated egos.Most people here are polite in my experience.Don't take it personallly OP,it is him not you,as DG said,his issue.
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GezWouldGo
13 years ago
Multiple messages? You mean you didn't block after the first?
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RHP User
13 years ago
You should have reported him from the first "abusive" message and then blocked him! Why you would want to reply is baffling me.. . If he has blocked you then all you have to do is go to "Home"..."My Lists"...."My Blocked List"...then click on "Add User" and type in his name and voila he is blocked! I would do this ASAP and don't give him anymore energy than you already have! xFunlovingx
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RHP User
13 years ago
you can still block someone although they have blocked you... just bring up a previous message that you had sent the person and click on the "block" option at the top of message, so in turn you can still prevent him from looking you up.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I have blocked him, so all good, and he's been reported don't you worry! My main question was how do other ppl handle being knocked back? Even if it is polite, does it still sting? Water off a ducks back for me, you can't b everyones cup of tea, it's just the way it is!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Went through the same situation, got abused by male/female...unbelievable but hey ...thats their problem , i told them politely sorry you are not what i am looking for, and they went berserked...ayayaaaayyy ! people need to learn to take it the facts that, sometimes you just not what her/his type.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Sometimes you just not his/her type...
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RHP User
13 years ago
Rejection is part of the game, but a polite no thanks is much better than being ignored. I've been knocked back and I've knocked back a few too. It's just the way it is.
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RHP User
13 years ago
My rational brain says that I shouldn't care about even a polite rejection.But the rest of my brain (apparently the much larger part) actually finds that it does sting, mostly just a little. I guess that's being human.It stings least when it is a polite, courteous "no thanks". Stings more when its a "no answer".And I imagine that, after the initial shock and revulsion and anger, it would sting not at all if it was a crazy rant.
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RHP User
13 years ago
even though when i do send polite messages to say hi, i rarely get a reply.and if i have got a reply it mostly to say no thanks and then im blocked..but id reprefer that then no reply at all.least it shows that there might actually be a real person on the recieving end..ive only ever had to block one person because they send an abusive message...and that was because they didnt like my veiw on a topic they posted on the forum..no matter which site your on or how polite a reply may be their always going to be someone that cant handle a rejection well..
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twinshadow
13 years ago
when get a 'no' response. easy move on, people shouldn't it so seriously.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I used to have a paid membership but have not renewed based simply on the fact that I dont message guys any more..too many bad experiences (guys can be as rude as) ...sad I recently used my one precious guest message on a guy - just by chance, I had stumbled across his profile..it was a really great profile, atriculate, funny, witty, different and eye catching - I sent a nice mail complimenting him on his very different profile style and how amusing I had found it..stating how clever he was - no comeon..just a nice email saying how funny I thought he was... and how he would be a inteersting person (IMHO) to have a drink with - but there was no suggestion in the email...just a statement. His Reply ""Babe, your punching above your weight"" Be afraid Perth ladies, his still out there. !!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Firstly I agree with DG. Why let some dumbarse get to you?? This reaction lowers you to HIS level....just sayin.Secondly, how do I deal with rejection??? Easy, it's not the end of the world if 1 woman isn't attracted to me. Afterall, we can't attract everyone, but we can sure as hell repel EVERYONE, so I make a choice to respect THEIR choice. Not so negative now eh??
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RHP User
13 years ago
When he blocked you he did you a favor. Must of been frustrating not being able to give him some of his own back. But look at it this way. You just got rid of one the worst type your libel to meet here.. Now you can get on with the important things in your life and put it down to experience.. Life is too short to dwell on losers...
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RHP User
13 years ago
because I used the D and C word Was expressing my honesty.Well, U did the right thing and if they cannot read, both your reply or your profile, to hell with em I say.I just got blocked by someone who view my profile and pics after I sent an initial message.... Like really?Had to update my profile- hopefully people can still read (ps - I can vouch for 3s-a-party actually replying to messages)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting '3s_a_party' I have blocked him, so all good, and he's been reported don't you worry! My main question was how do other ppl handle being knocked back? Even if it is polite, does it still sting? Water off a ducks back for me, you can't b everyones cup of tea, it's just the way it is! The way I handle it is this way - If I have no respect for you then I have no respect for your opinions and so you can say what you like as you wont touch me or get under my skin no matter how hard you abuse me.I realised long ago that it was my own opinion that mattered and not others.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting '3s_a_party' My main question was how do other ppl handle being knocked back? Even if it is polite, does it still sting? Water off a ducks back for me, you can't b everyones cup of tea, it's just the way it is! If I get a message saying thanks but no thanks, it's not a problem. The times it has stund a little is when there has been mutiple messages and things seem fine, then nothing. But I find that it happens in real life too. "insert crying icon here"
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RHP User
13 years ago
Once you get over your ego in life you realise that everyone has different taste. I take a knock back as me not being someone's particular taste. some people like apples, some oranges... others like really big bananas... Some people aren't that evolved unfortunately and if I was you OP I would view the response you got as an immature man with a bruised ego. The nasty things he said was purely him lashing out. If he thought you were fat, retarded etc he would never have contacted you in the first place! Just keep living your life happy knowing that he hates his! Winning!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Are something every bloke has to deal with right from teen years or earlier !If they can't handle it well gee grow up.I am totally okay with polite, silence, up yourself arrogance and downright abuse.It says more about her than me.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Every day of our lives in a number of ways, some we don't even realise have happened until later and others where we weren't even asking the question... and some where the "yes" comes without even having asked! It's not personal, it's matter of someone's taste/goals/ideals not aligning with ours. Accept it, move on, it takes a lot of "no's", but only one (or more!) "yes"... And abusing someone for knocking back an approach says more about the abuser's sense of entitlement and insecurity than the responder.
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RHP User
13 years ago
He spelt it out pretty well. It is a simple fact of life that men on this site have to message loads of ladies they like, whereas the ladies, like it or not can put a profile up and wait for their inbox to be filled. It's like Mohammed Ali's left nut - it ain't fair and it ain't right - but you know what, life isn't fair as much as we'd like it to be. I still prefer a polite 'no thank you' to no response at all, and I've had both in spades. Thanks to the ladies that have sent me those replies :) I really think that being a bloke on this site who regularly receives these forms of rejection - and keeps plugging on hoping to find a special playmate - is one of the biggest tests of character men can have. Put simply, men don't like rejection because we have an inbuilt ego that whispers in our ear, 'You are valuable and attractive to other people.' It's not how many times you get knocked down, it's how many times you get up again. Oh, and 3s, if you get responses like that it's a sure sign that he's an insecure dweeb that spends too long looking in the mirror!
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RHP User
13 years ago
" No worries, Thanks for the gentle brush off, happy hunting ;)" I cant see the sense in taking it personally- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
I also try to respond to messages and flirts. I sent a guy a thanks but no thanks response to his flirt. to which he gave me an essay on why he thought he was right for me, inclidung hi mobile number for when I come to my senses.... I blocked him then and there!!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Shinasbabe27' I used to have a paid membership but have not renewed based simply on the fact that I dont message guys any more..too many bad experiences (guys can be as rude as) ...sad I recently used my one precious guest message on a guy - just by chance, I had stumbled across his profile..it was a really great profile, atriculate, funny, witty, different and eye catching - I sent a nice mail complimenting him on his very different profile style and how amusing I had found it..stating how clever he was - no comeon..just a nice email saying how funny I thought he was... and how he would be a inteersting person (IMHO) to have a drink with - but there was no suggestion in the email...just a statement. His Reply ""Babe, your punching above your weight"" Be afraid Perth ladies, his still out there. !!! Would more than likely be the guy that blows in five seconds, and walks out the door. What a stupid man to say this, ego driven drivel. As to the thread, most men take it on the chin as do women. Its just the one or two that may have had a lot of rejection and slaps. It hurts, so wounded people lash out. Your beautiful and sexy, they want you they can almost taste you , and then bam...the prize is gone I feel for em. Reasoon is that as a woman, and a woman that only wants sex, even at my old age with my saggy body, I am never short of a man. Men on the other hand stuggle on here all the time. They get frustrated, so just have to deal with them at times. I never block anyone, no point as thats a second slap to their face, I just let them fade away by no reply or try to engage them into a more positive approach to women , some people need a little help at times.
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RHP User
13 years ago
3s_a_party, to get back to your original question, I can now handle it wih ease. I used to get angry at one point because I couldn't understand why women wouldn't meet me. Then I strated to really take notice of what was written in profiles and all of a suden it made sense. The fact is if people don't wan to meet you for whatever reason, they don't want to meet you, move on. As for that idiot, please don't take it to heart. The guy is so obviously so far up himself, it's not funny. I don't think he would be good company anyway so you have come out a winner.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Well I always like a response even if its a knock back :( we are all adults here and shouldn't get upset if your not someone's cup of tea. We have different likes it be a boring world if we all liked the same thing.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Maybe RPH need a name n shame page for the ones that do reply to a thanks but no thanks message in a negative way, we could also include the ones that don’t reply to messages sent to them. I have been a RPH member on and off for some time now as both a paying member and guest and the issue of people getting the shits on when they get a thanks but no thanks or the issue of people not replying to messages has been an on again off again topic for ages. As a guest you get people saying they won’t reply to Winks from non paying members and when these people join and send messages they don’t get replies to the messages they send so yes some people get a dose of “SOL“ with that. It is a shame that some people stuff it up for the decent people that are on RPH and make it harder for them. Maybe what we could have is all these so called experts that are on RPH give some examples of a good introduction message and how to reply to a thanks but no thanks message
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RHP User
13 years ago
I feel offended when on the odd occasion someone blocks us. To me thats a sign that we were annoying them and we always are respectful and friendly. I think some people such as we are speaking about just do a automatic your not our type and ill make sure you never see our profile again thought process. The most frustrating thing is if someones gives it too you via a message and then cowardly blocks you...... well that says it all that they are happy to abuse people but cant take it back. If your going to put someone down be damn sure you give that person the right to respond, just cowardly if you dont.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Always good to get a response from a woman, positive or negative.Its just life that sometimes that we cant have everything we want...so when it happens to me, I simply move on...their loss not mine.No point being angry or bitter about it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I gave up on replying to all messages a few weeks into joining this site. I was fed up of being abused!It's funny... when he first contacts me I am sexy, hot, amazing etc. And after a polite 'thanks but no thanks' I turn into a fat ugly whore.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Shinasbabe27' I used to have a paid membership but have not renewed based simply on the fact that I dont message guys any more..too many bad experiences (guys can be as rude as) ...sad I recently used my one precious guest message on a guy - just by chance, I had stumbled across his profile..it was a really great profile, atriculate, funny, witty, different and eye catching - I sent a nice mail complimenting him on his very different profile style and how amusing I had found it..stating how clever he was - no comeon..just a nice email saying how funny I thought he was... and how he would be a inteersting person (IMHO) to have a drink with - but there was no suggestion in the email...just a statement. His Reply ""Babe, your punching above your weight"" Be afraid Perth ladies, his still out there. !!! Are you serious. I would have written back "Well going by that response, I'm really not!"
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RHP User
13 years ago
Firstly I want to thank you for taking the time and haveing the decency to reply. Personally I think igroning some one is quite rude. I would much rather a "no spank you" than the silent treatment. On behalf of the male species, thanks. One thing to remember is that guys are getting nocked back left right and centre on here and some don't have the patience or temperment for it. Nobody is perfect. I'm glad you blocked him and now his issues stay as his issues. don't let it bother you because you did the right thing and REAL men appriciate it. Personally I can take 'knock backs' if there are some 'hit ons' to balance it out. But if its just knock back after knock back then I put myself on the bench (like I'm presently) until I feel good enough to have another crack. Secrets
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Micksecrets81' Quoting 'Shinasbabe27' I used to have a paid membership but have not renewed based simply on the fact that I dont message guys any more..too many bad experiences (guys can be as rude as) ...sad I recently used my one precious guest message on a guy - just by chance, I had stumbled across his profile..it was a really great profile, atriculate, funny, witty, different and eye catching - I sent a nice mail complimenting him on his very different profile style and how amusing I had found it..stating how clever he was - no comeon..just a nice email saying how funny I thought he was... and how he would be a inteersting person (IMHO) to have a drink with - but there was no suggestion in the email...just a statement. His Reply ""Babe, your punching above your weight"" Be afraid Perth ladies, his still out there. !!! Are you serious. I would have written back "Well going by that response, I'm really not!" A few lovely ladies from here (cause Perth is so damn small and we have to all look after each other..- messaged me and asked me who he was ............discreetly....... but to the point Ive named and shamed him) There are several ways to skin a cat and just sometimes.... revenge is a dish served hot !!!
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singlewood
13 years ago
I am in sales and i get about 100 or so no's a day, really if you took it to heart you would neck yourself, but back to the topic I would rather a polite no than no response at all, its polite good manners, and i dont waste my time or yours trying again.
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RHP User
13 years ago
its always better to get a nice reply than no reply at all
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RHP User
13 years ago
One has to accept or admit, however you think of it, that rejection is normal, and is healthy. Not as a bad way, but as a great learning tool.I expected to be knocked back, alot more than anyone would expect. In fact, i prefer a reply of polite rejection rather than no reply at all. At least i know , and respect, and move on quickly.If you cannot handle Rejection, than you will never succeed in RHP, or at public places. remember, High Expectations you have, the greater the crash and burn it will.
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RHP User
13 years ago
If a person responds badly to rejection, it is because it is in their nature. In the same way snakes bit. It's what they do. Just ashame you happen to be on the receiving end.
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RHP User
13 years ago
i wuld like to say not to take it to personally you knocked him bak which made him feel uncomfortable and in return hes just vented there are diffrent reasons why people knock other people back weather it is looks personaliity or marital status but should always be done in a respectful manner .and if its not handled properly by other person it is there issue you got to have your own self confidence in order to deal iwth rejection
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RHP User
13 years ago
We all come here for different reasons and from different directions. Thus we can only connect on certain level or levels if such opportunity presents its self. Sense of reality can never be on the same parallel with sense of expectation because they conflict by constant change. But I can say that rejection in writing is a testimony of a person who takes time, pays attention and knows what they want. Kudos, grown to know what is good for you.
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RHP User
13 years ago
what else am I supposed to do? Force you? The only thing is if I'm still interested id ask why because it might be something I can improve on. If not? So be it.- Posted from rhpmobile
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De0cypher
13 years ago
I've usually gotten a "thanks for at least letting me know you're not interested" etc - when I respond saying I'm not interested in various forms of those words - but did get someone once say that it would've been more honest to just say 'no' as opposed to candy coating it. I always try and remember to treat people - even though it's all online and the various nuances of tech conversation can often be lost - the way I'd like to be treated..so I'm polite and nice in my refusals... no excuse for rudeness but did wonder after that incident! I will always respond though.
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RHP User
13 years ago
after a few messages I would prefer to know why someone has gone off me. So many ppl on here just stop responding, why not tell me sorry not interested. Same goes for after meeting- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
But it begs the question, can you take getting knocked back? Is it all in the delivery or is it never nice to hear....I say different strokes for different folks, each to his own ect, would be interested to hear other peoples opinions Hi, and thanks for your post.I'm repeating what others are saying ... you asked for opinions, so here's mine. Sure, I can take knock backs, it's the usual state of play for me. It's never nice to hear, but, for mine, a response is better than:> no acknowlegement whatsoever of receiving a flirt or general "hi, love your profile, happy to chat with you, hope you're enjoying your day" message,> no "please", "thankyou", "take care, wish you the best",> negativity, harshness, judgemental tone, aggression, rudeness, anger, impatience> not being treated as a human being with feelings.Looks like this is a common thread that many have been faced with and I am sick to the back teeth of people using the relative anonymity, distance and perhaps facelessness of this site - "keyboard warriors" - to cause hurt for others.I am a member of another site and I see this time and time again, especially in the chat rooms. It's usually the guys that are the aggressors, but then again, there are some incredibly rude, nasty women out there.Blocking for me is a last resort - I can't believe I get blocked for no reason whatsoever, without even an exchange of messages - ie, I search, open a profile, enjoy the pix and what is written in the lady's description, and next time I see them online and go to open their profile, I see I'm blocked ... grrrrrrrrrr ... it's pathetic. But, yes, if you are being hassled or abused, definitely report them and then block them.I'm here to have fun, meet friendly, sexy people and I expect to be treated the same way as I treat others. There's no excuse for lack of manners, courtesy, politeness and respect. Anyway, thanks for reading, take care, wish you the best.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I have found that most men do appreciate a response...even though it may be "sorry, you are not what I am looking for", as most have replied "thanks". However, I have received 2 or 3 (not a huge amount, considering the many messages and winks I do receive) whom have chosen to be nasty...I have simply blocked them. Obviously the choice on my part is correct. Don't let them get under your skin; I'm guessing they are not even genuine.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hello... 3s_a_party I would like to thankyou for your reply, altho it was not the response I had hoped for I was very pleased to have recieved a reply rather than to be ignored by someone who has decided they got to what they were after or are not attracted to us... In my experience with RHP 90% of people only reply until they get access to our private gallery and have seen our nude pics, some ask to txt in order to get to know each other but straight away ask for more nude pics and if refused suddenly dissapear I'm very quickly getting over people's lack of manners and the amount of fakes and think I'll shortly delete my account - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
I almost always reply.... I simply have my own template with a polite,... thanks but there is something about your profile that doesn't click with me. I get some thank you messages for responding and I even get some asking for help with their profile. I find the worst offenders for sending back abuse are those that have not read your profile is the first place.... one delightful couple called me about 10 colourful names...... it was about that time that I realised I had really made the right call to say no : ) Rejection and acceptance is a part of everday life. Your personal style and manners will depend on how you take it all on board. In the case of insulting ignorant members - then it is Block! and NEXT!
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RHP User
13 years ago
especially on a Friday arvo and the sun is blaring down here in the Pilbara. That icy cold Carona.... Knock a few of those back I tell ya As for the other.. I love knock backs.... keeps it real.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I find a rejection is far better than no reply, as it at acknowledges that you have sent a msg and they have taken the time to read it and respond. I've had a great one before where they even responded saying why but said they did like other things about my profile - which shows they have gone to the trouble of writing a personalised response, which I appreciated.Plus, lets face it, part of being human is accepting that we can't win ALL the time, we should be able to deal with rejections/setbacks in all parts of our lives. I think people that respond angrily to rejections are probably struggling with their insecurities and may need to work on their social skills, and maybe realise that here is also different to other places.I agree with some of the above comments that stated that everyone is after different things, so there's no point taking it to heart. We're here to look for things that can be quite specific and we're only going off a profile to start with, so a response saying that you're not what they are looking for should be completely understandable.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I cannot understand why people get upset with a no. When I send my first contact mail, I ask, please respond in some way, even a no is fine. To me it is just courtesy, and it takes 30 seconds to do. If I get a no, I just leave it at that no further messages. BUT what probably gets to me more is people who do not respond at all. I guess they are just not mature enough to be on the site. Interestingly 99% of people do not respond, even those that had winked me !!!! Whats the go with that ?The other people are those where you might exchange a couple of mails, then they just drop off the radar !! Some even to the point where they were trying to organise a meeting.none of my mails are what you might call 'smutty or suggestive' they are what I consider to be courteous.Ah well takes all sorts I suppose.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Dear OP,I prefer to get a response, be it a message back or a firt saying a lady is not interested rather than keep on wondering. If I don't hear back I just keep on messaging/flirting with them until I hear something back. Irritating for the recipient I think. I am a bit better these days by checking if they have read my flirts/messages before sending another. So, for you and other women out there, there are guys who prefer knowing where they stand instead of getting the silent treatment. Likewise, I have messaged women back saying that I do not think it would work out. I don't know why he lashed out at you, but don't take it to heart. He might have had a bad day and your message was the first one he say. Wrong place wrong time I guess. Besides, do you really want to be with someone who thinks those thoughts about you? Sounds like he doesn't respect you and I wouldn't put up for such behaviour. There are a lot of decent people on here, so keep on trying. Good luck
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'tuscanred' Quoting 'Shinasbabe27' I used to have a paid membership but have not renewed based simply on the fact that I dont message guys any more..too many bad experiences (guys can be as rude as) ...sad I recently used my one precious guest message on a guy - just by chance, I had stumbled across his profile..it was a really great profile, atriculate, funny, witty, different and eye catching - I sent a nice mail complimenting him on his very different profile style and how amusing I had found it..stating how clever he was - no comeon..just a nice email saying how funny I thought he was... and how he would be a inteersting person (IMHO) to have a drink with - but there was no suggestion in the email...just a statement. His Reply ""Babe, your punching above your weight"" Be afraid Perth ladies, his still out there. !!! Would more than likely be the guy that blows in five seconds, and walks out the door. What a stupid man to say this, ego driven drivel. As to the thread, most men take it on the chin as do women. Its just the one or two that may have had a lot of rejection and slaps. It hurts, so wounded people lash out. Your beautiful and sexy, they want you they can almost taste you , and then bam...the prize is gone I feel for em. Reasoon is that as a woman, and a woman that only wants sex, even at my old age with my saggy body, I am never short of a man. Men on the other hand stuggle on here all the time. They get frustrated, so just have to deal with them at times. I never block anyone, no point as thats a second slap to their face, I just let them fade away by no reply or try to engage them into a more positive approach to women , some people need a little help at times. I would have to agree there with you 'tuscanred'.....and add that the poor sods are more to be pitied than blamed.Some guys have a vent when they are hurt. I mostly figure the majority of abusive replies are from guys who've just been caught on an 'off' day? One when they just can't catch a break and so lash out. I don't take it personally at all as I know that saying 'no thanks' is not a good enough reason for provoking the verbal rants. I know it is their problem.But to 'Shinsababe27', I think what you endured from that guy is the stuff that gets on my goat, ie; "punching above your weight?" Wtf?.... I think whatever scales that dude weighs himself on are seriously broken!
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RHP User
13 years ago
I have no issue with been "knocked back" afterall none of us appeal to everyone. What I do have issue with is been ignored & NOT getting a reply. It may sound arrogant or egotistical but been 6'6" I'm not easily ignored in real life & I do seem to carry some of that over to online. But then as per another current thread its all part of the screening process of seperating the fakes, scammers, tools & fools from the genuine people on here. So it seems ta damn'd if you do & damn'd if you dont, and its just a mouse click to the next profile.
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RHP User
13 years ago
two sites, about 3 years, only ever had 3 "no thanks", so from my point of view, no return IS the knock back, trouble here, and on SH, is that there is too many guys ruining it for the people that DO show up, DO not sent e-mails ranting like spoilt little boys etc etc etc, I just take it as part of the game.
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JessicaRabbit
13 years ago
How dare you knock me back, I have a vagina! Didaxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
As a single male on rhp, if you can't handle knock backs you've got a hard road ahead. Gets to the stage I enjoy receiving knock backs.... At least it's communication! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
You have to get mail to be rejected ,as for me i dont see it as rejection ,"its flirting" hahahah just kidding.Some people have class in the time of adversity others show their true colours.Just count your self lucky you see people for who they are before you know them!@Butts i never thought you were fat
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RHP User
13 years ago
If "you can't handle the truth" hahaha then these sites are probably not the best thing for you and you should move on. That doesn't excuse rude behaviour in those replies ( Shinasbabe27 ), at the end of the day a polite response in the negative isn't the end of the world....
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Playful2looking
13 years ago
As a couple who enjoy our play time. We all live fairly busy lives. A polite thanks but no thanks is cool we like to be told; other wise its like throwing rocks into a pond you wonder what happen. its nice to hear the splash. be polite and honest it doesn't hurt. the thing with the internet people can forget their manners.The dick heads will always be there just gotta go around them. Sure we are not everyone's cup of tea but we are not trying to be either.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Thats all I get is knock backs and time wasters... so I guess you cant be that unlucky to have had one.
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RHP User
13 years ago
i always thank someone who gives me a knock back, thank them for answering, & wish them all the best, when i do not get a response, it is worse than a knock back, but there will always be impolite people, it is there problem, not yours
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RHP User
13 years ago
Just checked out your profile and pictures.... Don't let the moron live rent free in your head, he is not worth it go find some one better...
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RHP User
13 years ago
Ill admit I do t respond to every msg or flirt, well mainly because I'm not sure how to answer it, or if I'm interested (because I might be!) plus a busy life sometime don't get time too, but now reading this I am worried I have offended people!
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RHP User
13 years ago
First up 3s_a_party sorry to hear you had this experience.secondly, I'm writing this half watching a show, so, I think I'll cover most of the points I intend though it may be slightly disjointed.I have found honestly over many years being involved in online communities (not just dating sites)there has been a pervasive shift in attitude that has seemed to ripple through all online sites that involve people.I mean, back when I was what, 18 I used to chat in irc, in #adelaide, interesting times, the way it would work is we'd organise a 'channel meet' where everyone would show up and play pool. Ideally we used to use the internet to find people local to us, meet them as soon as possible and then get to know the people we'd click with in person better.This was also in a time where you had to be fairly geeky to even be able to get into irc so most of us had some common interests while the remainder of the population at large were precluded by that lack of technical expertise.I didn't ever imagine what came next or that it would even be possible that there would be a time in which the internet could actually allow people to become so insular, and on such a broad scale at that.Fast forward ten years and online chat has changed and evolved and become far more inclusive which in my view is always a good thing but, I've noticed that a lot of people online build a 'virtual community' of friends they've never even met and think that those people will be there when/if things go wrong (which often leaves them disappointed and in some cases bitter when I think there's a bigger underlying issue). I feel like people use the internet to have a "safe" way to try and connect with people but, it may have gone a bit too far in that regard. For instance, in another dating site that I won't name, I found myself reading all these profiles of gals who have set themselves up with a 'shopping list' that precludes them from even talking to someone unless they are a perfect match. I laughed pretty hard when I tried to imagine them attempting the same thing in the real world and thinking wow, they're going to be fairly lonely, to the point it's sad that they even have a profile online because it has the potential to make them feel a false sense of security in the notion that they're out there on line and thereby don't need to talk to people in the real world, thereby making them even more insular and thus lonely, quite a vicious circle even if it isn't really my problem.I also feel like people haven't really considered the notion of just making friends online and expanding their social network regardless of whether a match or not with the full knowledge that there's a chance that surrounding themselves with people who have similar interests they're more likely to meet someone special, it could be a friend or relative of the person they're talking to online. What this really leads to is that generally the majority of people who have lost touch with reality and take advantage of the "online fantasy-land" tend to be either neurotic, needy/obsessive or just plain rude. I have found it interesting too because I always upload my worst pics simply because I don't really want someone in my life who is utterly obsessed over a picture from a website.Personally, I am not here to waste my time or that of anyone else, to the point that the way I handle a rejection is simple, even if it does seem eye for an eye in approach. I block the person in question and do not communicate further with them and find that I don't usually remember much else about them from that point forwards. It may seem arrogant but I think anyone who is willing to lock you out without giving you a chance doesn't really deserve one themselves. I attribute this to the fact that I'm male and my memory is not the best and blocking someone means they either don't appear in a search OR if they do you go oh I blocked them, cool must have been a reason for that. I refuse to swim around searching for treasure in a pool of piss when there's an ocean out there to explore :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'BettyPage69' Ill admit I do t respond to every msg or flirt, well mainly because I'm not sure how to answer it, or if I'm interested (because I might be!) plus a busy life sometime don't get time too, but now reading this I am worried I have offended people! Quoting 'BettyPage69' Ill admit I do t respond to every msg or flirt, well mainly because I'm not sure how to answer it, or if I'm interested (because I might be!) plus a busy life sometime don't get time too, but now reading this I am worried I have offended people! also relating to this : if I don't get a response I just let it ride, people are busy, that's understandable :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Sorry to hear that happened to you, some people just SUCK, period. For the record, you're not the slightest bit obese and clearly gorgeous, his loss entirely.I hope you do keep replying to people - it's so much better to get a polite decline than sit there wondering if she read it or not. Even if you have to lie "you're cute but just not my type and not what I'm looking for", or "sorry, not actually looking anymore" would be better than nothing.My suggestion would simply be to report and ignore the dicks who ruin it for the rest of us guys who can take a decent "no".
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RHP User
13 years ago
Interesting topic.. Sets my mind all the way back to 1979... last year at high school.I went to Inter school swimming sports, held at the Norlane pool just out of Geelong.A group of us were chatting, for a while and there seemed to be a good click happeningMet a really cute girl from Mt Moriac, and eventually got around to asking for a phone number.I was very pleased when it was offered without hesitation. So I called I think 2 days later.and on getting the young lady on the phone. I was told "oh no I'm not interested in going out with you."So feeling very let down, I asked why I was given the phone number. To be told " but I didn't want to embarrass you in front of your friends." Well; we never spoke again. However, that was the very best knock-back I have ever had.Regards to all,Anjin
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting '3s_a_party' I have blocked him, so all good, and he's been reported don't you worry! My main question was how do other ppl handle being knocked back? Even if it is polite, does it still sting? Water off a ducks back for me, you can't b everyones cup of tea, it's just the way it is! It’s difficult not to take it personally, particularly if you are a male guest and you finally get a message after a marathon “flirt game”. lol Without the facility to message flirts are like swimming one handed in a rip, so when effort has been applied and a message finally comes through, and it’s a tad negative, feelings can be “touched up” somewhat. That being said there is no excuse for a lack of manners, and as you suggest we can’t be everybody’s "cup of tea”. Enjoy your day!
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RHP User
13 years ago
I have sent a few contacts and gotten several no thanks I do prefer to get the polite no thanks ( yes it is disappointing) but Hay that's life and it seems like you made choice by the way the person went of their lid ( still wating on a yes lol )
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'onestiffdick' I have sent a few contacts and gotten several no thanks I do prefer to get the polite no thanks ( yes it is disappointing) but Hay that's life and it seems like you made choice by the way the person went of their lid ( still wating on a yes lol ) I would be willing to bet that the rejections are down to your profile. I would suggest making some changes, starting with your user name and your profile pic. A lot of women find those types of crass, explicit user names to be a turn-off, and same goes for the close-up cock shots as a profile picture. Most women want to see your body and face before they see your junk, and also there is the fact that a lot of women are guest users and hence can't see cock pics anyway. It will serve you much better to have a more tasteful body shot of some sort as your profile picture, and keep the dick pics in a private gallery. Also some of the wording in your profile description is - to put it nicely - rather offputting as well, e.g. "they realy turn me on and i soooo horny". I would be removing that, at a minimum. RHP put up an article just yesterday I think it was, giving advice to men on the things they should be including / avoiding in their profiles. Maybe give that a read to help you as well.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I personally feel that a reply, either rejecting or accepting, as long as its delivered in the right way - polite, is the best way to go.If anyone be it a guy or girl should become irate because of rejection and a polite one at that, they have a serious personality problem and should be blocked and reported asap.There are a lot of strange individuals out there so be careful.
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RHP User
13 years ago
sounds like a road-rage type of person
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RHP User
13 years ago
Thanks Luckdragon23 i will look into my whole profile and redo it once again
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