F53
Should I meet someone with a Fake Profile Pic?
May 31 2014
Comments
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RHP User
12 years ago
Your instincts or your curiosity.Will you regret not giving him the chance to meet you,or will you regret time wasted? If you have limited time why not schedule a short coffee meet?...At least then you will know if he is genuine,fake pics could mean he is married and just. enjoys the online flirting,or that he looks absolutely nothing like his "aspirational" pics.xx Q
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RHP User
12 years ago
I'm not sure how "you work on it" to look like a Latino model. One lie is not a good start is it ? What if he looks like Danny devito ? Which is great if Danny is your idea of a good looking bloke, but if you're attracted to Latino models...? As for validating what he actually looks like... Maybe a proof of life selfie ? A pic of him holding today's HUN perhaps ? Good luck lily, you seen like one of the nice ones... Hp xo💋 Because you're worth it...
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RHP User
12 years ago
yeah no this is definitely a don't go there situation. fake pic is fraudulent and deceptive. Ask for his real picture....if indeed he even sends you one that IS of him. he has already LIED to you regarding his appearance. So before u have even met the person they are lying.....are you reaaally sure you want to go wandering down that road?
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RHP User
12 years ago
I have to agree with Q, HP and Shells. I've found the most manipulative people will always play being the nicest people. They have been doing it long enough to know what works. Sorry to burst your bubble. If ever in doubt, trust your instincts. Good luck. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Aspirational pics should be on your fridge or "vision wall" not on a profile supposedly representing who you are now. If he has mislead you on this what else is not as it seems? Same goes for outdated pics. If you're 20 years older and 30 kilos heavier leave it the past. - Posted from rhpmobile
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MissBishere
12 years ago
You are a smart beautiful woman, be careful. I don't trust people that don't have real recent pics in their private galleries at least. Actually correction, I hate profiles with fake pics! He could have used a sunset or a stupid saying rather than a fake pic. And he could have private real photos. I am super duper careful these days with pics as I have a couple of stalkers that pop up from time to time. I get that he is trying to make a connection without being judged purely on his looks and it has obviously worked as you find the "idea" of him very attractive. But when you picture him in your mind what do you see? And if he does turn up and he doesn't look like that how will you feel? I personally would be insisting on real pics before it went any further. As HP said, with the paper in hand or some words you give him.
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MsJonesy
12 years ago
I think you have answered your own query Lily....and I don't think it is an unreasonable request. "I strongly feel that I will have to ask him to prove he is who he says he is." You are a gorgeous chick who has much to offer, and you have a busy life; why bother with those who are going to play games? I have a suspicion he is hoping your 'like' factor for him will build to a level that you will forgive him when you actually get to see the real him.
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Paradisepair
12 years ago
He's coming from a space of deceit. You deserve better.
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RHP User
12 years ago
You deserve to meet someone genuine and honest!! If he is as nice as you say he is then he wouldn't have lied. Please report him to Rhp. Fakes should be weeded out. Def get him to cam or FaceTime before you meet and meet in public, take all precautions!
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RHP User
12 years ago
I've been laid up with major surgery for the last month, so a lot of TV watching has come my way of late While resting, I watched the series "Catfish" not the movie, but the series on Fox . It was quite a thought provoking show. Although all the episodes started off with the classic situation you have described and some of these deceptions were amazing and long term, all but one couple when they met and talked (and I mean really talked about the how's and whys of the deception) all the couples resolved the issue, connected even more so and stayed together as friends or commenced romantic relationships. I think there were 13 episodes and 12 couples stayed together and their relationships/friendships were stronger as result of the "deception" and the initial communication that took place. Of course it depends exactly what your looking for. If you are time poor like Q said, then a quick meet will make up your mind one way or another, if he refuses to meet so be it. His wasted your time and you move on. Life is a risk/gamble on every level but I also think you may wonder about the "What if" factor. Although I agree with Skyping etc before hand, I doubt he will do this, yes I believe he probably is lying. But what matters here is how you feel. If the guys makes you feel good and is ticking some if not all of your boxes a 1/2 hour meet cant hurt. If his not physically what he described, and this bothers you, then leave. If your somewhat attracted, stay and at least listen to his story as to why he has done this. You never know what may result from that. It really depends what's important to you and what you value. Looks, meh, sure they are important and so is chemistry but I am a strong believer in how someone makes you feel and how they treat you and although you may not become lovers with this person, maybe a friendship could develop. One can always go a friend Yes people lie, and often, about everything and although starting off any friendship with a lie is not a good start, people will lie irrespective and will continual to do so. If I can share a bit. I have someone in my life, who although he never misrepresented himself to me, he was not in his eyes, an attractive man. The photo he send me was about 5 years old and he had not aged well. He was very self conscious about the way he looked especially as my line of work is in the arts and I'm very visual. He believed I would judge him based on his level of attractiveness when we first met and that actually hurt me that he thought that. He is the most beautiful man I know, generous, thoughtful, caring, wise and I love him to death. We have been lovers and we will always be friends. For me, how he makes me feel and how he treats me is all that matters. Either way, with any meet, be safe, be true to yourself and I wish you all the best.
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RHP User
12 years ago
The email flirt phase is really good fun, but I always remind myself that the excitment at that stage is all my own imagination with the emails from the other party being just the fluffers feather in the situation. In the end you meet a real person with good bits & bad bits and their own back-story and floppy bits. There are other ways to mask identity, some very imaginative and artistic even, so the married excuse doesn't carry for me either. It is lazy, deceitful, a misuse of someone else's image in a context THEY would not be comfortable with, and we should always reject it when we find it (in fact RHP would probably take the picture down and block the account if they were made aware of it). The other reason is that meeting him will be rewarding bad behaviour. We might as well all put up shots of models if that ploy is allowed to work and just put up with the fact it is a blind-date every time.
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Seachange73
12 years ago
to all who posted. Food for thought. It does show how new I am in this type of dating. I have come from a traditional, monogamous dating style and have mainly been in a relationships but it seems that it does not work for me at the moment, hence my desire to explore the 'non-traditional' dating scene. So far, so good. Lots of great men on RHP. It did present a conflict to me as I reallly like the guy and never experience anything like it before. I did not really want name him nor demonize him, as it is not my intention. Just want to bounce ideas on people's previous experiences and make sure I am not left high and dry on my own waiting for him for a drink. It is not my intention to waste my time nor his and I am all about discretion but would like to make the connections we all seek here. Some of your gorgeous ladies (a couple who has just posted above) and gentlemen I have met a few weeks ago in Big O's fun Melbourne meet and greet. And would confirm that I am who I say I am and represent on my pics. this is just me, honest, transparent and wanting to connect. No complications, gentle, friendly and sensual. Again, thank you. thanks people.
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Seachange73
12 years ago
Quoting 'MissBlissBomb' You deserve to meet someone genuine and honest!! If he is as nice as you say he is then he wouldn't have lied. Please report him to Rhp. Fakes should be weeded out. Def get him to cam or FaceTime before you meet and meet in public, take all precautions! I wont be reporting him as it is not my intention to do so. He has sent me a couple of pics via phone. And he is luscious. But thanks for your compliment and you are gorgeous too. thanks Chicka.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Lord of War....."Considering relationships end in lies and decceit, it seemed liked a good way to start one "*grins*
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RHP User
12 years ago
Your gut has already told you what to do. The end. ;-)
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RHP User
12 years ago
He may ask for money next!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'arkangel1978' yeah no this is definitely a don't go there situation. fake pic is fraudulent and deceptive. Ask for his real picture....if indeed he even sends you one that IS of him. he has already LIED to you regarding his appearance. So before u have even met the person they are lying.....are you reaaally sure you want to go wandering down that road? Ditto from me.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I was just contacted by a guy with a profile pic straight from the net. I thanked him for his message and asked him why he felt the need to use a Tumblr pic. He responded it was freaky I would look up his pic, told me I was insinuating he was a fake and promptly blocked me before I could respond that I was just asking and I wouldn't be the last woman to do so. Ah well, my loss.
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MsSuperFoxy
12 years ago
I always think...if they have a fake pic what would they be like in real life?? You know those who have to hide themselves, do have something to hide and always will. There will always be a reason as to why. Lilly it's your choice...only you know what to do. Sometimes we just gotta make good and bad choices to realize later on, that those choices helped and supported with life experiences and learning curves. Good Luck with what ever choice you make.... I'm little curious how it all goes and the outcome. :) Foxy xxx
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RHP User
12 years ago
My view.... if they feel that they HAVE to fake it, just to encourage you to make it.... then the real person isn't worth it, they know it.... and you should close the door, and say... NEXT!
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RHP User
12 years ago
I simply agree with the others, their lies become them. Why on earth would you start something with a lie. It's not worth the risk! It's happened to me on two occasions here, where the pic didn't meet who they were in real life.I walked away from our meeting. Regardless of we all all enjoy here, we should still feel safe. Koz.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'lilyorchid' He has sent me a couple of pics via phone. And he is luscious. So happy for you! Not sure his reasons for needing an "aspirational" pic, but some of us never believe we are as attractive as other people may find us. Glad you find him luscious and I hope you have a wonderful time when you meet him!
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RHP User
12 years ago
how is a photo of someone else on your profile worse than a photo of your breasts/ass/cock etc.? would you be scared to meet with someone who has a photo of their legs as the only profile pic? how is it worse than not having any photos at all? would you be scared to meet with someone who has a grey square as a pic? same stuff...
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'MsElle72' Quoting 'lilyorchid' He has sent me a couple of pics via phone. And he is luscious. So happy for you! Not sure his reasons for needing an "aspirational" pic, but some of us never believe we are as attractive as other people may find us. Glad you find him luscious and I hope you have a wonderful time when you meet him! I've heard the term 'aspirational' about pics in the forums before, I'm sure. . I feel using a pic that's isn't yourself isn't the worst sin ever, but because of the questions it raises in our security concsious world, and you did ask lol I would consider asking for more than a pic via phone, and consider a video chat of some sort. I hope it all works out peachy!
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Seachange73
12 years ago
Quoting 'MrsPeachyFool' Quoting 'MsElle72' Quoting 'lilyorchid' He has sent me a couple of pics via phone. And he is luscious. So happy for you! Not sure his reasons for needing an "aspirational" pic, but some of us never believe we are as attractive as other people may find us. Glad you find him luscious and I hope you have a wonderful time when you meet him! I've heard the term 'aspirational' about pics in the forums before, I'm sure. . I feel using a pic that's isn't yourself isn't the worst sin ever, but because of the questions it raises in our security concsious world, and you did ask lol I would consider asking for more than a pic via phone, and consider a video chat of some sort. I hope it all works out peachy! Ladies, thank you very much for your feedback and the rest of the posters as well. Much appreciate the pearls of wisdom and some of you have been there. I think I will deliberate and make a decision in time that would make my time in RHP a better experience. I know that whatever decision I make, I will have to own it and take responsibility for this 'learning' opportunity. Y'all have been wonderful and generous in you advice and sharing your experiences, my virtual friends. Big thank you.
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Seachange73
12 years ago
Quoting 'kinky_gemini' how is a photo of someone else on your profile worse than a photo of your breasts/ass/cock etc.? would you be scared to meet with someone who has a photo of their legs as the only profile pic? how is it worse than not having any photos at all? would you be scared to meet with someone who has a grey square as a pic? same stuff... I for one will not meet with someone with a grey square for pic nor spoken to them. That is plain IDIOTIC. Not performing some research before a meet is just asking for it. but thanks for peaking into the forum..
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'lilyorchid' thanks for peaking into the forum.. I wasn't "peaking" (whatever that means). I was responding to your question! And you're welcome
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'kinky_gemini' how is a photo of someone else on your profile worse than a photo of your breasts/ass/cock etc.? Troll.
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Seachange73
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Quoting 'kinky_gemini' how is a photo of someone else on your profile worse than a photo of your breasts/ass/cock etc.? Troll. Amen!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Troll. And you're cute too But if you think about it for a minute, you may just realise that as long as there's no photo of your own face on your profile, there really is no difference. Shocking, hey )
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'kinky_gemini' But if you think about it for a minute, you may just realise that as long as there's no photo of your own face on your profile, there really is no difference. Shocking, hey ) So... if I used a photo of (say) some bronzed swimwear athlete, and pushed the representation that it was me in the photos.... that'd be ok to deceive someone with that?! Or... if I pretended to be a very attractive woman, and messaged you, representing myself as that woman and interested in you to the point that you wanted to meet the version of "me" I was portraying? That's ok too? No difference huh
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' ok to deceive someone with that?! Well, I'm not interested in judging whether it's ok or not. What I'm saying is - it's the same thing. Some people think it's ok not to show their face in their profiles; they choose to demonstrate various body parts or other items instead. Others go for fake photos. Where's the difference there? Deception or at least extreme caginess in both cases. Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' if I pretended to be a very attractive woman, and messaged you, representing myself as that woman and interested in you to the point that you wanted to meet the version of "me" I was portraying? Wanted to meet someone having never spoken to them on the phone and seeing them on Skype? Seriously? Come on ) Anyone with half a brain would have the sensibility to check who it is they are talking to
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RHP User
12 years ago
You are teasing all those plushy lovers with that enticing pic :-) xx Q
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'kinky_gemini' Anyone with half a brain would have the sensibility ...to understand the difference between sense and sensibility
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'kinky_gemini' how is a photo of someone else on your profile worse than a photo of your breasts/ass/cock etc.? would you be scared to meet with someone who has a photo of their legs as the only profile pic? how is it worse than not having any photos at all? would you be scared to meet with someone who has a grey square as a pic? same stuff... But Lily orchid has photos in her gallery and I am sure she has a face shot she has shown him. Some men are not facing reality Lily I remember the first man I met from here who had a picture up of him that must of been 20 yrs old he wasnt fazed by representing himself in that way. This man will not be what you expect even the photos on the phone may be fake. Stay true to you lovely lady
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Cest_la_viebaby' But Lily orchid has photos in her gallery but I wasn't talking about her. There's a couple of forum regulars who proudly display their legs in the air and nothing else ) plus, as I said, lots of profiles don't have any photos at all.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Next thing Kinky_gemini will be telling us is that being selective about which parts of our bodies we show is lying by omission.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'kinky_gemini' Quoting 'Cest_la_viebaby' But Lily orchid has photos in her gallery but I wasn't talking about her. There's a couple of forum regulars who proudly display their legs in the air and nothing else ) plus, as I said, lots of profiles don't have any photos at all. Have you heard of those things called private galleries? That's where a lot of people put their face pics. There is obviously a difference between putting up a fake pics of some model/s, and having no pics at all. The first is creating a certain expectation in someone's mind, the second isn't. You're just being contrary for your own amusement.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Dont fuck around and wonder tell mr latino to reveal himself . Problem solved . - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
We only posted up our ugly photos because we are soooo damn sexy that everyone in the whole universe wanted to jump us. haha.. we wish! Personally we would prefer no pics at all above fake photos any day. We are beautiful on the inside and hopefully some people will also like what they see on the outside.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Well all we can say is tha trust is a huge part of this lifestyle we enjoy.And quite frankly he has started of on the wrong foot.we as a couple would have absolutely nothing to do with him ,but thats just the way we roll .Good luck with what ever you choose. mnm...
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RHP User
12 years ago
I had it happen to me personally on this site, keep in mind i am no oil painting so why she would lie was really sad.I had chatted to her for a while and exchanged pics non of which were her .Even though she had a great personality she lied which only makes you wonder what else about that person is fake. I would be concerned lilyorchid , only my opinion though and good luck
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RHP User
12 years ago
Don't be afraid to ask him to show you actual photos of himself or have a chat on Skype... If he has nothing to hide, your request should not hurt him or offend him... If it does, I would definitely avoid making any plans to meet him and cut off all contact. There are lots of nice honest men out there ;).
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'MsElle72' Quoting 'lilyorchid' He has sent me a couple of pics via phone. And he is luscious. So happy for you! Not sure his reasons for needing an "aspirational" pic, but some of us never believe we are as attractive as other people may find us. Glad you find him luscious and I hope you have a wonderful time when you meet him! If you are attracted and get along famously and get wet at the sound of his voice, then why not! There are plenty of people who have pics up that are not them, so if wasn't fake as in a picture of someone else they were attempting to fool you into believing was them, then not so bad.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Luckdragon23' There is obviously a difference between putting up a fake pics of some model/s, and having no pics at all. no, there isn't. People use different techniques these days to create a fake image of themselves. Posting ten year old photos, photoshopping, using apps for correcting/airbrushing their faces, it's all the same... fake. Having (supposedly) your own picture that looks nothing like the current version of you is no better or worse than having no pictures at all, or using someone else's. That's why only an idiot will assume that what they see on someone's profile is an accurate representation of that person they are talking to
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RHP User
12 years ago
Seems obvious - Posted from rhpmobile
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moreforyou69
12 years ago
Personally, I'm not a fan of dishonesty, but the choice is yours. Generally if a person is creative with the truth in one area, it will follow in other areas. Even if the lie is a one-off, it's casts a shadow of doubt which is hard to shake. It depends on whether you see meeting him as a 'take it/leave it' deal, or something more. If you proceed, tread lightly and keep a tight lid on your expectations. Good luck xx - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
He is a fraud, blast him then brush him.
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joanne1991
12 years ago
I once asked a man if he was interested in meeting as I am from the nt and he from vic I offered to pay for flights and accommodation, this was after several months of talking, videos etc have never heard from him again, not sure whether I frightened him off or whether his profile was fake - made me think twice though
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rupamohan
12 years ago
Out style is to keep it logical, simple and non judgemental that is assume what others say is truth, if in doubt ask and share openly what will be the consequences if it turns out to be false. Our style is NOT a common style specially I don't expect forum types to have this kind of style but hope it is helpful. ---You asked him about his profile pic he told it is inspirational pic..I see nothing much fake here. May be in strict sense bit fake because he should mention in the profile that pic is only representative and inspiration. It is not uncommon to go to a shopping site where pictures of products is shown for illustration purpose with a clear comment that actual product is of similar nature. But since he answered your query. I won't be too fussed. ---You are worried about how he looks simple ask him to pass you his real pic... ---If you like his real pic. You can choose to meet. ---If you want. you can tell him that if he doesn't matches with the real pic..you won't hesitate to simply walk out. Chances are if the pic is again fake he will not meet you. ---When you meet if you find everything fine. ENJOY --- If second pic turns out to be fake too. You walk out. END OF STORY. The other style can be you discuss with the whole world..to guess what is in his mind..but it will be hard to know..or to ask how others will react in same situation...
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'cavey50' Lord of War....."Considering relationships end in lies and decceit, it seemed liked a good way to start one "*grins* if the meet was about getting al hot and dirty ....check him out if he is cute Go hard
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'rupamohan' ---You are worried about how he looks simple ask him to pass you his real pic... Can I also add: videochat. No amount of pictures can prove that they are genuine while a simple Skype video call will solve this issue once and forever )
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RHP User
12 years ago
All I can say is that, honesty and trust are two fundamental principles, that should never be ignored, no matter how sexy or engaging they might sound on the phone. I can never understand, the point of being here and pretending to be something or "aspiring to be" when it's furtherest from the truth. Sooner or later you will get found out. It's deceitful, which would call into doubt about who they really are or what they say. Granted people have reasons as to why they do it, but all it does is hurt peoples feelings and cause mistrust. Trust your instinct, but be mindful of a hidden agenda. There is no reason to have a fake pics! Might as well have no pics... - Posted from rhpmobile
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Kattss
12 years ago
A guy I was chatting to had a fake (maybe Latino) model as his profile picture. I should have guessed it was too good to be true, but I have met some really nice and very handsome men and never questioned his legitimacy or did a reverse image search. Anyway when we finally decided to meet up... A random Indian guy showed up, I was shocked and confused more than anything. The date lasted no more than five minutes and I questioned his photos and he said it was his cousin and didn't he look like his cousin?.... Umm no!!... I asked him to leave, because he wasn't who he said he was. And he went with no dramas... Super awkward! The thing that confused me, was he was a good looking guy, clean cut, good job, well dressed, so in my opinion had absolutely no reason to lie about anything. But a lie is a lie and I didn't want to pursue it any further. Honesty is the best policy. But due diligence also helps... Reverse image searches flush out most fakes photos and the best way to check them out is to Skype first. Plus i find Skype breaks the ice a bit and I'm a lot less nervous when we do finally meet. So Skype or webcam chat online I think is the best way to confirm identity.
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Seachange73
12 years ago
Thanks again for all the feedback, sspecially the constructive ones. I know he read my postings and was not happy to be the subject of the forum. I tried to keep his id private to respect his privacy. I did not mean to offend him but just getting some ideas as never been in this situation before. I did apologize for putting him under the spotlight but I followed my instinct to question. In reflection I could have done something different. Followed a different path but I chose to consult with you guys as i am unable to share my experience in RHP with anyone i know in real life because i know I will be judged by my family friends and colleagues for being on here. Online dating novice. lol. Grasshopper has so much to learn about this alternate dating universe. But I believe I will not be meeting him. He has I believe pulled out of the meet and refused to speak further. (Insert sound of crickets here -->). His decision. :-(. Im ok with that and life goes on. Nothing has been lost nor compromised and we both did enjoy the online and text flirts. However that was all it was and it shall remain as such. From the little I know of him he seemed like a nice.person. Will reflect on this during my run tomorrow early morn. The colder the better to rid of the past. Again thank you for all your gracious interest and posting. Another learning experience for me and life is still wonderful. Happy hump day! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
However if you do one main check first confirming what he looks like and you connect in the brain then maybe you can ask him to take a selfi of himself in front of the rhp current screen.. He may actually be embarrassed the way he looks, but be an amazing and awesome person. If you feel a gut feeling listen to it! But don't mis-interpret it.
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RHP User
12 years ago
This is an "adult" site and if he is not adult enough to be honest enough with you then you should not meet this guy!! if he is being deceptive from the start you cannot trust him!! I have chatted with one guy who had a false profile photo and he said it was the closest likeness to him that he could find on the Internet!??!! WTF? The closest likeness to yourself IS yourself!? That is the whole point of being on this site: to be yourself! If they are not being honest with you in text: I doubt very much that they'll be honest with you in real life... do you really want to take that chance...!!?? Shut him down. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
What did you decide to do?....and if you did meet,what happened?curious Q xx
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'lilyorchid'I know he read my postings and was not happy to be the subject of the forum. I tried to keep his id private to respect his privacy. I did not mean to offend him but just getting some ideas as never been in this situation before. I did apologize for putting him under the spotlight but I followed my instinct to question. I thought you were fair and you definitely protected his identity. I've come across a fair few profiles with pics of male models from all over the world, so saying he used a Latin guy's photos certainly doesn't give him away. I suspect he felt caught out and broke off contact to save face. It wouldn't surprise me if he blocked you for good measure. Sir, if you're reading this: You brought this on yourself. Grow up and do better next time.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Just saw your post Lily xx Q
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RHP User
12 years ago
I too don't believe that you have done anything wrong lily. You haven't id him, so if he's upset it's because of his doing not yours... Hp xo💋 Because you're worth it... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
His loss is somebody's gain ;) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Those with fake pics seem to have heaps contacts ? Those normal ones (like me) have few contacts ? I feel if they start out fake then it will end that way?
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RHP User
12 years ago
It's not always pleasant to see the details of your private conversations with someone being posted in public. Just recently I had that happen to me, and even though the person who spilled it into the forum did not mention any names, trust me, it felt rather strange to see the whole thing being picked apart by strangers. Needless to say I made the two people who posted this aware of my feelings, and they had to back down and eventually requested that the thread is removed from the forum. So from my perspective I completely get how this whole thing feels, and I think he was absolutely right to pull away from dealing with the OP after something like this. The above is my personal opinion. Sorry if it offends anybody.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I always face chat first. I don't pay attention to images on here as I cant even see most of them lol
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Melbourne_Babe' I always face chat first. I don't pay attention to images on here as I cant even see most of them lol Personally I've never face chatted with anyone prior to meeting them in real life, I most of the time don't even talk on the phone with a man or couple beforehand.Out of two dozen dates (give or take) I have never been burned by someone not being who they said they were or by being stood up. Does that make me extremely lucky or street smart?
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RHP User
12 years ago
One man I'm reminded of, whose pics were outed as fakes quickly after he joined the forums. He received a lashing from a few of us, and quickly replaced the offending photos with ones of himself. A female friend ended up meeting him for coffee, and by all accounts he was genuine and friendly. I don't know his reasons for using fake pics, it turned out he was fine the way he was.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Quoting 'Melbourne_Babe' I always face chat first. I don't pay attention to images on here as I cant even see most of them lol Personally I've never face chatted with anyone prior to meeting them in real life, I most of the time don't even talk on the phone with a man or couple beforehand.Out of two dozen dates (give or take) I have never been burned by someone not being who they said they were or by being stood up. Does that make me extremely lucky or street smart? I never face chat either, rip it off like a bandaid
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Seachange73
12 years ago
I hate to admit it but I do get what you mean and you make a good point about being dissected by strangers. I am not offended at all. I see it from your point of.view. Nothing like empathy eh? Walking in someone's shoes. I still dont know why show the aspirational pic as the other pics he sent me via phone shows a very good looking fit man. Despite the outcome I still think he is lovely complex man. Like most human beings. Thanks for your input. - Posted from rhpmobile
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Seachange73
12 years ago
Thanks. You are beautiful. Hope you are well. Xxx - Posted from rhpmobile
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Seachange73
12 years ago
Thanks to all sp. Meander HP ralf Q and the academy. I think I have gotten some good advice and viewpoints. The moment has passed and time for me to move on to tomorrow and face the promise and challenges it brings. Another chance to grow and learn. Another chance to be happy and give happiness. Another shot at giving and receiving love and kindness. Peace to all. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
I'm totally with Melbourne_babe on this one. I think personally you are mad not to see the person on cam first. Mea, no offense but I do think you are lucky. . or as you say Street smart. . .. However in the majority of cases I bet some women would not be as lucky as you. and end up with a person no where near like what their profile states. I'd want to chat first hand to see if any connection because no matter how good looking of they can't string two words together or are obnoxious I'd want to exit stage left real quick. . and at home safely in front of your pc that would be a flick of a button and s block. Everyone is always on about safety in here. It would be unwise to meet with someone before doing some back ground work. Especially singles who do not have a back up of s partner there
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Saturn65' I'm totally with Melbourne_babe on this one. I think personally you are mad not to see the person on cam first. Mea, no offense but I do think you are lucky. . or as you say Street smart. . .. I must be very lucky as well, because I have also never had a no show or someone not looking anything like their pics (that's from years on both the adult and the more traditional dating sites). I don't even have a webcam, but I have other vetting techniques including listening to my intuition, which is something we do not do enough. If you have even small doubts in your head about someone, there is usually a valid reason for that. Many women will go ahead with a meet even when they have doubts, and that's usually when things don't turn out well.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Luckdragon23'. I must be very lucky as well, because I have also never had a no show or someone not looking anything like their pics (that's from years on both the adult and the more traditional dating sites). ...Many women will go ahead with a meet even when they have doubts, and that's usually when things don't turn out well. It's got nothing to do with luck, really.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I still would never dream of meeting anyone without viewing them first in 2 d mode from the safety of my home.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Have had no issues. Some I've had a chat to over the phone but not all. Some were even better looking than their photos.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Funlover, thanks! And Saturn, I do think that's a good policy. I'm sure some people think LD and I are just lucky nothing bad has ever happened to us on dates, and I understand that. It works for us because I think she and I are very intuitive people, as well as quite vocal when it comes to expressing our intuition and being very good at saying no when something feels off. I certainly wouldn't recommended it to everyone. Do what works for you, people, your safety is paramount.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I'm another (with Mr Peachy in our time of play) who didn't have troubles with nasty messages, or people who didn't look like their pics or people not turning up when they were meant to. We even met without pics and just a phone call after we placed a personal add in our local paper, in our time before RHP! I'm not sure we would have met him if we'd seen a pic but that experience rates up there in the top 3!
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RHP User
12 years ago
A classic "catfish" tale. What a ridiculous story..... what would he say if you had a fake model pic up and then he met you. He's an idiot. If he is talking about an injury that's a classic excuse for fake profilers to not meet. "Oh I'm nervous about meeting as the scars from my car crash haven't healed...". Don't meet him. There are plenty of other guys on RHP who will love you and want to meet you.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I had taken a poor photo the other day I was messaging two ladies a single one and one from a couple.. It was going nice they both asked for my photo to be made available so I took the photo never really looked at it and put on in showed it!!!??? Then one after the first the single then the couples ladies stop messaging back to me used up all my daily.....I look at my photo closely and scared my self shit it was ****Int ugly well I thought they would of said not the look I am looking for or something like that........Well to cut along story short I did the right thing and paid the price I would still do it again if I had to do it over but I would look at photo first...I don't bad hair day I think Hahaha - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
NO. On an interesting side note, having had profiles on these types of sites for a while now, I am starting to really be able to pick the scam profiles. On another site this evening, I was looking at the 'new profiles' and based on image/handle/blurb (and even being able to recognise some of the same "people" in the photos), 62% of the (less than 1wk old) profiles I believe are fake!!
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RHP User
12 years ago
So let me get this straight.... His name not mentioned. No real details of the messages exchanged were revealed. Some generic details maybe. Fuck me; for all we would know lily orchid could have made this a hypothetical situation in order to prepare herself in the event she IS faced with it; yet he headfucks himself and turns into wimpy little wuss ??? Meh; dodged a scud missile lily. PS. Kinky. Old pictures aren't fake. They're dated yes; but they are a snapshot of the owner of the profile. Not a completely different person. PPS. Melbourne babe.. WebCams can be shit quality too and give a less than flattering image too. I'm not saying webcam is a bad idea; but I hope it's not the end of the line decision maker. - Posted from rhpmobile
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Seachange73
12 years ago
Quoting 'sir_stir' So let me get this straight.... His name not mentioned. No real details of the messages exchanged were revealed. Some generic details maybe. Fuck me; for all we would know lily orchid could have made this a hypothetical situation in order to prepare herself in the event she IS faced with it; yet he headfucks himself and turns into wimpy little wuss ??? Meh; dodged a scud missile lily. PS. Kinky. Old pictures aren't fake. They're dated yes; but they are a snapshot of the owner of the profile. Not a completely different person. PPS. Melbourne babe.. WebCams can be shit quality too and give a less than flattering image too. I'm not saying webcam is a bad idea; but I hope it's not the end of the line decision maker. - Posted from rhpmobile My dear man, not sure how showing the details of the messages and his name would be relevant to the situation. Just a bit indiscreet? Maybe I am reading that wrong. And NO, this is not hypothetical. Not something I would make up just to post something on the forum or part of a disaster recovery plan on online dating. A bit cynical? You should give me the benefit of the doubt that what I have posted is based on my experience otherwise I will state that the situation is hypothetical. Just a bit insulting to my intelligence and integrity. But thank you for you point of view. x
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RHP User
12 years ago
I think Sir Stir was just making a point, it was a joke. He's a very funny fucker our our Stirry Lurker. No offence was meant I can almost guarantee.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'lilyorchid' Quoting 'sir_stir' So let me get this straight.... His name not mentioned. No real details of the messages exchanged were revealed. Some generic details maybe. Fuck me; for all we would know lily orchid could have made this a hypothetical situation in order to prepare herself in the event she IS faced with it; yet he headfucks himself and turns into wimpy little wuss ??? Meh; dodged a scud missile lily. My dear man, not sure how showing the details of the messages and his name would be relevant to the situation. Just a bit indiscreet? Maybe I am reading that wrong. I think Stir is agreeing with me in saying this guy really had no reason to get this upset about your forum. You didn't expose him in any way.
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Seachange73
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Quoting 'lilyorchid' Quoting 'sir_stir' So let me get this straight.... His name not mentioned. No real details of the messages exchanged were revealed. Some generic details maybe. Fuck me; for all we would know lily orchid could have made this a hypothetical situation in order to prepare herself in the event she IS faced with it; yet he headfucks himself and turns into wimpy little wuss ??? Meh; dodged a scud missile lily. My dear man, not sure how showing the details of the messages and his name would be relevant to the situation. Just a bit indiscreet? Maybe I am reading that wrong. I think Stir is agreeing with me in saying this guy really had no reason to get this upset about your forum. You didn't expose him in any way. I misread your post and misunderstood your intention... Eating big slice of humble pie now....
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RHP User
12 years ago
MissBlissBomb's answer wasn't there when I posted. Stir is a funny fucker indeed.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I was actually subliminally saying this guys needs a personality transplant. You revealed no details about him. You revealed no details of any of the messages exchanged. You protected his indentity at EVERY stage of this thread. HE gets all whiny like a sook due to him reading this thread obviously or the fact that you told him. He chooses not to meet you cos HE feels like a wank, and then proceeds to project that into you in private....., Sorry to say Lily, but HIS humiliation is HIS and his ALONE. Keep posting your respectful questions as sometimes other people's experiences can offer a level of comfort, reassurance, and some really positive methods of managing and overcoming situations like this to achieve an enjoyable outcome for all parties involved. AND...... I said it before and I'll say it again. You dodged a scud missile not a bullet; but not for the guy having fake pics, but for being an insecure little twat. Have a nice day :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Yep that's it :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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Seachange73
12 years ago
Quoting 'sir_stir' I was actually subliminally saying this guys needs a personality transplant. You revealed no details about him. You revealed no details of any of the messages exchanged. You protected his indentity at EVERY stage of this thread. HE gets all whiny like a sook due to him reading this thread obviously or the fact that you told him. He chooses not to meet you cos HE feels like a wank, and then proceeds to project that into you in private....., Sorry to say Lily, but HIS humiliation is HIS and his ALONE. Keep posting your respectful questions as sometimes other people's experiences can offer a level of comfort, reassurance, and some really positive methods of managing and overcoming situations like this to achieve an enjoyable outcome for all parties involved. AND...... I said it before and I'll say it again. You dodged a scud missile not a bullet; but not for the guy having fake pics, but for being an insecure little twat. Have a nice day :) - Posted from rhpmobile HUGS X
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