Should men be straight forward approaching woman on RHP

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  "Let's face it we all know why we are on here" No, you don't, you really don't. Presuming to know what other's want is your first mistake. And being straight forward...how do you define that? To me, politely straightforward would be complimenting the pics or profile, or something the person may have said in the forums. Sexually or crudely straightforward where you start your first message with "wanna fuck", "hot pics babe", etc... may work on some women, but most likely not the majority. Call me crazy, but I like to be treated like you think I'm a normal human being deserving of a little respect.... (*Sorry, not meant to sound like a rant*) LOL - Posted from rhpmobile

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  Quoting 'Eiliethiya'Call me crazy, but I like to be treated like you think I'm a normal human being deserving of a little respect.... ...just reminded me of an old joke? She: ''If we do this, will you respect me in the morning?"He: ''Hell, no...I don't respect you now!" Another case of you reap what you sow...as so to be sure as not to offend, Eiliethiya you rock! ...best, CM

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  Start with the profile. The ratio male / female here is such you need to stand out. You join a much smaller list though if your message can reference something in a ladies profile. You've jumped a first hurdle of all those who haven't read the profile going straight to an ignore list. Or spend some time on the forums, you may find some you'd like to message as you liked what they said or share a common interest. In some regards, if you do the 'research' it's easier. Go up to a woman at a bar and you (or at least me!) have a chance of completely mangling what you were going to say / talk about. Here you're often handed a list of 'talk to me about this' and have auto-correct and re-reading your messages to save you from yourself. And with all that just accept you're going to get a lot more misses then successes with message replies (let alone leading to more). You can either be bitter or accept the ladies rule this roost and go with where that can lead. RHP is a great site, once you bring your expectations back from the realms of fantasy to reality.

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  On here that think that this is a casual dating site so every woman on here just want to meet and have sex is unbelievable. Does wanting to find someone to be comfortable with and have a sexual relationship go out the door because it's casual?? I think not. We are intelligent human beings that deserve respect. Try and actually have a conversation that doesn't revolve around our favourite sex position, you'll get much further. So pretty much what eiliethiya said. Women tend to put more effort into their profile so the least guys could do is actually read it before sending a pointless flirt or message. Sorry also sounding like a rant 🙄 - Posted from rhpmobile

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  Probably more chance winning lotto then if your approach is to straight forward without any depth behind it. Wanna fuck will get u blocked. Fuck just upsetting someone in the forum's gets you blocked.😂 Presuming that eveyone is here for the same reason is your first mistake. Plenty of people here that aren't looking or content with who there with. Or just as happy to put there opinion accross in the forum's. I'd probably suggest you read there profile and hope they appreciate a good profile with current pic's.Then prey for a reply if your religious. - Posted from rhpmobile

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  Hard to know, without knowing what you say in your first message. I'm fine with guys flying in full pelt, within reason, but I use my own verification process due to fakes and don't like a phone number being thrown at me in that first message, or even if they're trying to rush me off the site, some use this tactic to slip through. So long as it's general sexy banter with no immediate pressure to get me off the site, along with giving me plenty of vision, I then have time to check they are legit and chat a bit to see if we're on the same page. But a no reply can be for a variety of reasons, it might be the written word, might be the attraction isn't there once more vision becomes available, it might be what you have in the background of a picture lol we become super sleuths, par for the territory, so you might be thinking it's your message, when that might have nothing to do with it. Have you asked for feedback or have any offered their thoughts? I rarely respond to requests for feedback, why wasn't I attracted, because no matter how carefully worded, it can be hurtful, but I just wondered if you've been told it's your messages. Hard to give proper advice without knowing how you approach 😃

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  Personally I'm still figuring out why I'm on here, so OP, no offence, but assume nothing. As others have pointed out, we all have our various reasons as to why we are here. Never assume anything about anyone at anytime, is my off the cuff advice. For me, I only want a guy being straight up with me, after we have exchanged several exciting messages via here, we move on to other mediums to communicate further, where we are figuring out, if we attracted enough to meet. We go the meet and its mind blowing which leads to us ubering to someone's house, his hand is caressing my thigh, his leaning into me and whispering into my ear, exactly what he is going to do to me, the moment we hit that front door. That's exactly when I want to him to be straight up. Till then, I like a bit of mystery, excitement, delayed gratification and the tease. Am I hard work ? I don't care if I am

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  Unless yourself is an arse. That is my best advice. - Posted from rhpmobile

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  You're in a bar, pub, club or any other social environment. When a woman catches your eye and you talk to her for the first time. How do you talk to her? You don't know why she's out and what outcome she's hoping for by the end of the night. Why would online be any different? Just because it's in RHP doesn't mean we're all here for the same reason and doesn't mean you shouldn't invest a little time first. Take the time to get to know someone first before unleashing the beast of straightforwardness. 🙂

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  Totally agree with both of you Also, there's no need to apologise. Sometimes a good rant is just what the doctor ordered (not that I think either of your posts came across as a rant).

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  Quoting 'WiccaWitch' You're in a bar, pub, club or any other social environment. When a woman catches your eye and you talk to her for the first time. How do you talk to her? You don't know why she's out and what outcome she's hoping for by the end of the night. Why would online be any different? Just because it's in RHP doesn't mean we're all here for the same reason and doesn't mean you shouldn't invest a little time first. Take the time to get to know someone first before unleashing the beast of straightforwardness. 🙂 How I approach a lady If I was in a pub/bar rarely would I just walk up to a lady and say "Hi, How are you ?" or "You're hot, wanna fuck ?" or "How was your weekend ?" only exception, is a few times in my life after making some serious eye contact with a lady who has strongly indicated that she would like to skip dinner and go straight to dessert have I used the "wanna fuck?" line, and this was when I was younger and full of shit. Now I'd like to think I have a bit more finesse, although I'll be honest, the thought is always there I treat this place like I would if I was at a party. Say hello, introduce yourself and make a personal comment (in this case, make mention of something that was attractive or interesting in the ladies profile to indicate to her that you have read it) At a bar I may comment on what she is wearing, or a comment about the atmosphere at the bar, or the band playing. Always be respectful, don't call her pet names like, babe, or hun, don't hassle her for her photos, just gently ask if you may see who you are conversing with, as the conversation starts flowing but there's no rush. Get to know her a bit first. Ask genuine questions and listen to her answers. Indicate that you're starting to get into her and you do want to get to know her. Share with her bits about you that you feel comfortable with but make it interesting and varied facts and don't talk about how you're just out of a long term relationship and just after a bit of fun. Just don't. If after a while its not happening, there's no chemistry or easy to and fro, give it a rest. It usually doesn't improve so you move on. and if rejected on here, accept it graciously. You wouldn't hassle a lady at the pub if she said no, so don't do it here either. Just because you're behind a computer screen, doesn't mean civility ends and being a knob kicks. Relax, you will meet the right lady, she's out there. Kit No uber then. Black London cab as I recall .

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  AnnieWhichway

  9 years ago

  When his phone number is in the first message. In the first line because there is no second line...... And the words get in contact with me. My response" no chance with a message like that and a Dick pic your only offering" His response "fuck off. This is not a dating site," Well, I'd suggest that would be a wrong approach.....

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  Other people have commented on this, but I'd like to take it a bit further. The reason many people are tempted to believe this statement is because there is, in fact, a grain of truth to it. RHP is a social networking site for the sexually/sensually/erotically open/curious/adventurous. But this is not in and of itself a huge piece of information with regards to any one particular person. Just as no two people are the same in terms of their character and personality, hopes and dreams, wants and desires, so no two people will be the same in terms of their sexual character and personality, their sexual hopes and dreams, and their sexual hopes and desires. I think that the problem here is that you may be projecting your own sexuality onto all of the other members here, even if you're not projecting your own personhood onto them. Will some women respond positively to a crude and direct request for NSA sex? Probably. But most will not. Will some women respond positively to a confident and classy statement of interest? Probably. But many still might not. This really applies for every possible way to approach a woman. Take some time to read her profile, maybe. Initiate a conversation about something she might like. Remember, there is no perfect way to approach a woman, because there is no one perfectly encompassing psychological or personality category that encapsulates all women.

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  AnnieWhichway

  9 years ago

  Well said Sherlock......... Been waiting to use that line.....

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  I simply send a genuine, complimentary message and mention things about myself that they are/aren't looking for and try not to get too in depth. As one of the many, many males on here, I understand that if I'm not what they are looking for, I probably won't even get a reply because of the amount of messages certain profiles attract. The result is that I get the odd reply from someone who is interested in chatting and on occasions I get a very nice 'not interested' reply thanking me for sending a respectful and polite message. I'm happy because all I'm doing is being myself and being honest when I send a message.

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  RHP User

  9 years ago

  My dear Whichway... (That worked too well not to respond with)

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