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RHP

RHP User

M65

Switch Play

January 04 2010

sex

Firstly I have to explain what I mean by Switch Play. This is a term used by people involved in Domination and Submission sex. In general terms you are either a Dominant or a Submissive. So switch Play is where you assume the opposite role to you overriding sexual preference.   I was pondering the other night after read a profile where someone was seeking a switch player. Could you really and effectively switch roles. I am a dominant so how would I go be a submissive. To be in a role where my one and only objective was to please. I would have thought that would be very difficult to achieve and I would certainly end up at the wrong end of a flogger way to many times.   So if you are truly one or other of these roles do you think you could effectively assume the other role and switch? If you are a switch player how do you reconcile the side of you which is the greater or do you just do this for play alone.   Play alone is where this is a simple sexual thing, as opposed to full roles where you want to live the role. Earlier I used the word “please” as opposed to “pleasure” as there is a world of difference I guess it is the difference between long term and short.     LC

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Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Playing only one role means you get only half the benefits;The good thing about role play switching is that you can explore who you aren't.RegardsMr SR.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    I would find it almost inpossible to switch with the same partner. I certain understand your point but with a regular partner who is always submissive I would think it very difficult for both to be effective in the switch.     LC

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    The words submit and dominate are emotive.    If I submit to you then I am bending to your will...giving you consent to do as you please within boundaries of course. If I bottom to you then I am in it for the physical senstation only. If I were to dominate you then my expectation would be to do the things to you that I want to do...again within set boundaries. But if I were merely topping...you call the shots.   To this end I am a switch...I will top and bottom. But I will not submit because that takes trust and comittment. And I will not dominate because I am not invested enough in any one person to do so.   Personally I think being a switch in the true sense of the word is like being bisexual...you have a preference even if it is 51%-49% but going either way doesnt change who you are. Not everyone can switch just like not everyone can be bisexual.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Sure - With the same partner - I agree it would be very difficult.   Cheers   Mr. SR.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    I had to reply to you because I just have to tell you that I love your reply... perfectly sums up the difference between top/botttom and D/s... as well as explaining switching very succinctly. I personally find it difficult to be "just" a bottom... I like emotional involvement as well as physical sensation...And I'm similar to Lovecurvie... I have always been attracted to one side of the equation... I'm very uncomfortable in a dominant role, so I personally don't switch because it does nothing for me. Seductionrules... completely agree with you too... most people that switch lean more in one direction than the other but it is fascinating to discover who you aren't.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Ii am with both of you to me it is not simple sex it is the whole deal...hence switch play seems to be something that would be almost impossible for me. It is the whole emotive position and the commitment that is the real attarction.   JMHO     LC

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    For someone who doesn't switch Sister Mary Sophie, I have a hunch you would do a fair job of being Dom, without raising a stick. :p   Hang on a minute though.... topping, bottoming and being versatile in an m/m situation is not just about what position you find yourself in. It is, so far as I can gather, identical to bdsm dominant, submissive and switching.... but absent of ritualised rules (yet some will recognise that it is ritualistic). Also, it may be absent of any props or implements, but not always... But still emplys very typical BDSM activities like spanking, bighting, pinching, breathe play... maybe watersports.... whatever is agreed... Really I think we are on the same page, except for pro-forma ritual.. which I would like you to explain more about Lovecurvy. Personally, I don't need any more physical floggings or that kind of discipline... I mean, I've got the enough brain damage already to last a lifetime... Nope... I'm a free range bdsm student if there is such a thing.. hehe.... I'm a libra.. what else could you expect of me. :p.   Hugs Stalky

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    There are a lot of gems of advise which appear in these forums from time to time. Definitions, explanations and everything except a demonstration. Maybe it already exists here... but if not... a collection of these resources would be most useful.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Not now.  Not in defined D/s sex.   But not so long ago I perhaps did...meeting new people for the first time..play alone.   Roles are not defined in play alone so it's about feeling your way with that person (have I got this definition right Love Curvie?).  It was during this play that I was able to explore switching, and  I was able to identify with the submissive role.  The dominant role (regardless of the physical orgasmic fun) left me feeling flat.   Still, while I like to submit, I also like the occasional spontaneity...a lucky dip...it's fun and ya never know what it may bring   Jacqui

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Variety is the spice of life so switch play sounds like it would spice up your sex life. I have had lets say a very vanilla sex life with my ex of 20+ years. So the only switching I can remember was top, bottom and other positions. Now out to explore and switch play sounds the gociao hermes

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    I think that as a one off thing swtich play is ok and do able but in a sustained relationship I can not see it working. As onebrightstar said it is about feeling emotion and is not about play alone. I guess there real line in the sand is the differance between one off play and and ongoing play.   One off play is just that a simple encounter where you can role play any thing and in our case a dominant or a Submissive.  However for ongoing play/relationships b it within a defined circumstances (casual but sustained) or a full time relationship I can not see how you could switch. The value in the relationship is all about emotion the pleasure come from the emotion involved more so than any physical aspect.   So i dont really think with in the true sense of D/s that some one can really be a switch player. I dont beileve that yoou can be 60/40 D to s it just does not play out to me. I think at thimes the comcepts of this would be better discussed in a nice lounge bar over what ever happens to be your choice of drink. it is something that can get very involved.   There have been a few posts on similar subjets over the past week so ther is at least a little interest...     LC

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