What's in your fetish list ?

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  The difference between being smacked on the arse with a feather and a whip being used. LOL. Maybe you can use fur lined handcuffs, delicate silken ties or cold hard metal cuffs and jute rope. l I dont know to me a smack is a smack is a smack! l and I do hit back.....hard!

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  Brae :P

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  Very good question Brae and not something I have really defined before. When I think of hard bondage I am thinking of things that really hurt or bruise or draws blood. Such as being hit by the cane, nipple clamps (but can't say as I haven't had them on), being tied up in positions where it becomes painful, breath play, needles, spanking because it hurts by bot bot :P, etc Soft bondage, well cum on the face is soft, being tied up, blind folded, whipping but not that hard, following demands, role play in vanilla situations or everyday situations, anal toys, strap ons, candle and wax play, fucking machines, etcThat isn't really much help is it. I have met a few women now who are in a master / slave relationship and I don't really get that. You sit there and they spend the whole night texting the master asking them for permission to do things. I mean I understand that when the master is there with them or if you do the whole texting them on occasion. But all the time? So for me BDSM is a bit of fun and role play, not something I would ever take seriously enough to ever have a master. Sometimes for a bit of fun yes, but not as a lifestyle. Because sometimes I want to be the master - if you get me in a certain mood I may turn around and bite you... or at least try and take that whip out of your hand... so what do you do to the subby then Brae?xxMeeka

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  I thought hard was with an erection and soft was... well... umm.... soft.Maybe it relates to whether you employ a feather duster or a riding crop.. but I don't think so.... I mean to say... the ruff with the smooth .... an soft pink arse needs a decent warming up before you should go about putting in the big welts... am I wrong?? Least.. mine does.HugsStalky

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  Welts on that perfect ass Stalky. Noooo..... can I kiss them better for you? Licking my lips in anticipation. *slurp* xx Meeks

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  Of Hard and Soft in terms of how serious you are about it. Like Hard would be adopting the role completely (even if just for the day) and not breaking out of it. You follow the roles to a T and it being very full on. Soft I think of in terms of using the props but still being cheeky and more of a play type scenario, you might do a role play for a little bit but not at all 'becoming' your role. Still both using similar toys , ropes, props, but the seriousness and mind set is what defines them for me.

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  Go ahead.. hit me on the arse with that feather fionabee mentioned and then we can work our way up to flogging me with a strip of paper torn out of the sunday tele ... or if you really want to get rough , start throwing cotton wool balls at my naked body as hard as you like.. Now that is soft...Medium.. Flick my arse and genitals with a riding crop just hard enough to make me flinch a lil. Prick my body with some pointy nails..needles etc or drip some hot wax on my nipples, stomach, and wherever it takes your fancy. hmmm um okHard... nipple clamps...ouch. stick a long needle through the head of my dick.. (eyes are watering ) or.. you do that again and I'll warn you I'll stick that riding crop right up you're arse... Now thats hard...Thats my take on it anyway... hehe

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  Certainly no expert...as I have never crossed the line between BD/SM and there should be one in my humble opinion. The SM side of the line is of course sado-masochism where the pleasure may lie in the pain and not a line I care to cross. That said, if you approach the line carefully, and you find that place where the pain may give pleasure and is not used to excessive force...it can be quite sensual and erotic. An example are those hand crafted cane clips that I have mentioned...easily adjustable and when taken gently to the "she just bit her lip" stage and backed down, can often be very pleasureable to some indeed. | The silk ropes are another example, and can be as simple as knots or as graceful as an erotic macrame'...and always soft against the skin. The sensuality begins when you realize that the dominance is in the give and take of trust between two. Blindfolds, ice, hair tugging or wax that is warm but never hot..simply ehance the experience if you care to play a bit more. | This for me is the fine line...and something I do enjoy with the right partner and only those that I am intimate with in other ways. As for the rest...I find steel to harsh and pain is never a pleasure unto itself for me anyway. | Good luck and as always...have fun.

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  sexslaves

  15 years ago

  I see here that people that are not into a bdsm read to much bullshit and don't understand any of the life style it comes down to hard or soft is what the person sees as soft or hard what one person sees as hard another sees as soft and nothing is done to main the person and there is just not master and slave there is also a sub and a switch witch are all different As for bondage eg soft with rope work might be just tying some ones wrist together and hard may be tying a full body harness and then tying limbs to that in safe but different positions. Or as with discipline with a cane where you tape the persons ass softly but still over time makes the ass red to hard where hitting the ass leaving welts. thats the basics

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  See, the Master makes you wait and wait for answer... I mean is it any wonder a girl gets up to no good when his back it turned. :P xx Meeka

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  Soft bondage - light restraint, not much pain, lots of teasing, sensual touching, forced orgasm. Session is more sexually based and usually ends with a sexual act.Hard bondage - full restraint using chains, leather cuffs, hoods, mouth gags etc, greater use of pain to stimulate pleasure or to control, harder use of whips, canes, crops and paddles, dominant may use machines to stimulate pain like tens machines, violet wands or even sybians, submissives are often humiliated, orgasms are controlled by the dominant. Sessions are based on control and domination is more mentally based rather than sexually based although sex acts are sometimes part of the session.As a professional I get to do both sensual and hard sessions but as long as my clients have a good time and go away happy I don't have a preference.

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  looking2try3, MistressT is right on, I second what she said. Though in addition, there are variations of hardcore and softcore depending on who's involved. It's really a grey area based on opinion an, though if you are not sure, I would suggest going with soft to see how you like it. If you like the domination involved (or dominating), then you can step it up with experience. Though care should be taken to make sure everyone's safety is prioritized if things are getting a little more 'hardcore', because damage can be done if not done right.xxxRed

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  I think soft bondage is when you use a feather and hard is when when you use the whole chook lol. I have experimented a bit with both soft and hard and i think soft is more kinky vanilla and hard is .....well a whole different experiance as its more a power play Master/slave or Dom/sub . Blond_art x

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  Mistress T's definition nails it for me, but as shown, it's going to vary for other people.I really don't like that it doesn't define giving or receiving on the fetish list here, that's led to some awkward moments post-nudeup when people haven't mentioned anything in our conversations prior suddenly reveal 'i saw that you like X' thinking they'll be doing X to me when actually it ain't going to happen that way and then I have to make them stop pouting before I can get them to open up and take the ball gag xx Sarah

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  RHP User

  15 years ago

  Actually most of the harder activities go on behind closed doors so few people are aware of them outside the BDSM community. Also most people don't realise that it isn't all about inflicting or receiving pain or humiliation, it is about control using domination and release by the act of submission. Not everybody will get the psychology behind why people willingly submit to mental and physical torture.

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