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RHP

RHP User

M67 F66

When do you know????

July 03 2013

This is my first go at this so here goes. You chat, email, text and talk to other couples. You set up a meet & greet and you all get along, we'll you think you do. There is lots of banter and laughs, but that is t. You find yourself talking for hours, then you get, when you come to town next time let us know and we will organise something. So far we have done the travelling, the hosting I supposed, we have gotten a nice apartment on two occasions. Provided a few drinks and nibbles, and for what. To sit around and talk. The last couple we met we talked for 4 fucking hours. We are only knew to this scene, we would appreciate your comments. Hubby now seems to think we should put a time limit on it. Say talk an hour and a half then just come out and ask. They know our faces, have heard our voices, know our likes our dislikes. We have been supper upfront and honest. What are we doing wrong? Help required. We are back in Melbourne the first weekend in August and don't want that trip to be a wasted effort. Don't get me wrong, we realise that you need to click etc but far out. Hope to read some net resting opinions. Take it easy on us, please Thanks for your time

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Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    One of you has to make the first move. I assume the other couples you were with were relatively new to the scene as well. I have a been involved in a few group situations with a friend of mine. We meet the other people, go to a hotel room or where ever it is we are going, and next thing you know my friend is standing there stark naked, well if he likes you that is! LOL. Then he starts to hug me, I hug back.......... then we invite the other people over for a kiss and touch. I suppose this doesn't leave much room for the other people to say no. LMAO. I think after about 40 minutes, you should ask. So would you like to go to the bedroom or get more comfortable... something like that. Or maybe lean over and kiss your wife.....

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Thanks for that I think that is where have gone wrong, most of the couples that we have met have told us that they had experience, but in saying that maybe we pushed the, we are new to this a little too much and we got to the point where ne couple needed to make a move. Should there be subtle gestures, or should you just come out with it. We can't all be e dry ones cup of tea, but!!! How many people like to do only meet & greet first?

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    What about suggestion a game like strip poker or some other sex game to get you all more in the right frame of mind. Get an apartment with a spa is always good... that way you can all nude up and get in it. I am seriously gobsmacked that you talked for four hours with out doing anything!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Me again! Okay, I think you are saying that this is the first time you have all met and it is in an apartment that you have organised? Okay, so maybe 40 minutes is not long enough to get comfortable. I agree with your husband though, an hour and a half is more than enough time to assess whether you all want to take things further.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Maybe the conversation is where it all goes wrong. The kids, the work, the holidays, even fucking pets. But the funny thing is we have laughed and really enjoyed their company. Maybe they are beng polite, maybe they don't think we click. I can't figure it out.its doing our heads in.We know that we aren't barbie abs ken, we don't hide who and what we are. We exchange pics and all that. There is no bullshit so go figure lol. Anyone out there in meeting up with us 2/3August?

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    As Meeka said if starting is a problem, then start playing with just you two... see how they react. I mean they are probably just as nervous as you... relax the mood and see where it goes! Good luck though!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    First date is always scary When I am with hubby we catch up in a bar ect for a drink then we decide if we are going to play then or next date but he asks them up for a drink if all good then he generally makes the first move by taking off his shirt then starting to undo a bit of my clothing fairly soon after getting to room When I play alone I always meet up for a drink with hubby there and don't play on first date but when I meet them at motel later I am less forward than hubby and let them make the first move which is usually 15 or 20 minutes but we generally talk with them for an hour to an hour and a half on first meet - Posted from rhpmobile

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Meeka is on the money here... Somebody has to start somewhere and it might as well be you. I have been both the guest and host and after 30mins you know if you want to get it on or not.. So make your move...You don't need to be rude or too forward, just show the way, they will either follow your lead, join in or leave. Personally when they see you and your partner in g strings/ thongs with a damp crotch and a hungry cock busting for freedom, You will soon know where you stand.

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  • Cheekyarses

    Cheekyarses

    13 years ago

    Wannafeel.... come on a play date with me and Mr Cheeky and after an hour of being in a motel room with a couple I just take my clothes off and say "well we arent here just to talk - we met on a sex sight and you have said you are interested, if you are not - there is the door"..... I can be very blunt and Mr Cheeky gets alittle not embarrassed, but I sometimes say what I probably shouldnt, but thats me.....The good thing about being in a motel room is that you have no obligations to stay, you can leave at any stage if the couple are not for you.... Time is precious and time is the best thing that you can give anyone as you can never get that time back, so make it worth it.I would prefer a couple to say to us that we are not what they are looking for then to be polite and waste our time.Good luck and keep us up to date on how this journey goes, there are some fantastic people on rhp.....

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    I'm sure you are right and that is what we think we will be doing from now on. And you are very right, we are all on here for the same thing, we are adults, allowed to have our own opinions and have every right to not want to pursue something. So onward we will go and keep smiling and keep being us. If that isn't good enough for others,then they don't know what they are missing, lol Thanks again and have a great day

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    I don't have experience with couples (hint), I can only imagine it is four times as hard !First up establish wether at the first meet play is an option or is just a sounding out.Second, yes I have been down the four hour date path and agree it is frustrating, lovely people good conversation but no result, really you know if its "on" after about 15 min max ! So yes, set a time limit and then make a move. Something like " well we're really enjoying your company so it's a green light from us, would you like to.......Join us in the spa....get more comfortable......do some exploring.....get naked " etcConfidence is king.

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  • Two_Tarts

    Two_Tarts

    13 years ago

    Actual sex is just the final part of seduction (unless you're just here to get your dick wet) and so if the seduction doesn't work then the sex ain't going to follow. For some seduction is quick and simple (usually the guys), while for others (usually the girls) it actually requires a bit more effort and at least an element of the social etiquette. While undoubtably different for different people the venue for seduction is important and with couples meeting couples it is a bit of a four way thing, which is a big ask even in the perfect venue and with the perfect people.   For us, if we think you're fun with your clothes on, then we think you will probably be fun with your clothes off. Sitting over coffee, or meeting for the first time in somones hotel room for something that resembles a job interview is just not that much fun, and is really not seductive! Been there, done that, got the t-shirt, sometimes if you instantly click it can work, but our experience is that it is more likely to doom possibility to become failure.   Dinner= sure, drinking =great, dancing =fantastic, the chance to take your clothes off for a Spa without the need to ask someone you just met foir a root = awesome, an early chance for a change of venue so that you can guage enthusiam to stay together (and give couples a chance to ascertain each others thoughts) = great idea, somewhere you can stand up and move around to engage in that light physical interaction and guage each others responses to move forward = brilliant, a bit of personality = everything..   There are no shortage of people here who just want a quick fuck and might regard a bit of fun, flirting, and seduction, as slowing the point down. That's cool and all power to them on their mission. Our prefered experience is as much about indulging in the pursuit as the capture, and that takes a bit of flirting and fun. That takes more than "I've got a hotel room - are you going to root me or not". If you are fun and prepared to practice your most shameless flirting on us then we will be in that spa naked with you in a New York minute, but if you're not then we are much more likely to enjoy a long conversation. (We do genuinely enjoy most of the conversations, but its a bit of fun that will get our clothes off).   Sex is great fun with the right people, but the fun needs to start before the sex!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Thank you for your comment. I would like to say that we have wined and dined with a couple which was lovely. The idea of us getting an apartment was more because we are not from Melbourne, the two occasions that we have done this the couples didn't come from within the CBD area. The idea was to create a nice relaxed atmosphere, we 4 like minded people could engage in good conversation and be relaxed. For us that is a much nicer idea than a noisy bar or pub or bustling restaurant. We are adults, we are not here for a quick fuck or to get our or their rocks off in 5 minutes. We are here to explore, to experience, to feel, to enjoy, to receive and to give. And hopefully along the way find people that we can catch up with from time to time and either see socially as they are great people, or to see and play when we all wanted too. Hopefully, we will make better meeting partners in the future. It may never progress to anything more, that isn't the point. My original question was in asking for pointers on how to get the conversation around to at least, Are you interested? Thanks for your comments

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  • melbcpl01

    melbcpl01

    13 years ago

    Wannafeel your company was great , nudie fun next time guys hehehe

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Quoting 'melbcpl01'Wannafeel your company was great , nudie fun next time guys hehehe I love a happy ending!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    And they all lived happily ever after !Too cute love it !

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Sometimes at a party or in a small group there is a point of critical mass. Everyone chatting and talking and then one person takes it to the level of "playing" and five minutes later everyone has pretty much followed

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    This is one of my pet peeves about swinging. We all know why we are here yet we talk for so long!!Granted it is so easy to talk to like minded people but I'm sick of everyone waiting for someone to make the first move. Drives me mad, then its 1am before anyone is naked! arrghh

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