Write another forum posters profile!

A challenge by another forum poster to rewrite his profile for him made me think about other peoples perceptions of us.   So feel free to choose anyone and rewrite their profile for them.(lets keep it positive and in the vein it's meant)   It seems only fair that if the forumite likes the profile they should have the right to copy it and use it.   Obviously it would be easier if you've met, but don't let that stop you as it is meant mostly tongue in cheek!