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Paradisepair

Paradisepair

M50 F51

Your Approach to Newbies

September 14 2013

newbies

A recent situation has brought up two topics of discussion for me which I was going to combine (see Your First Time) but although totally related the conversation would be diluted. Here I'm interested in what y'all think about being part of someone-elses first time. Context - We had our first experience with a couple who had never swung before. We weren't really activity avoiding newbies before then but kinda thought that going there could be a minefield of other peoples emotions. Plus newbies don't have a lit of what we use as info to weed out fakes (real friends, validations). Anyway it was a very positive experience, we were able to bring a lot of thought and care into making sure everyone was comfortable at all times. And they were very genuine and open. So I think we'll definitely be more open to the idea of taking on newbies than we were before. Their curiosity and sense of adventure reminded me of... Us, back in the beginning. One thing though was that I found myself very much in my head as I logically processed how we could help make it super cool and fun for them. So I lost a bit of the opportunity for wild abandonment, which hopefully I'll get to make up for later :P Anyway I can see some people might not really want that, or want to uncertainty of cold feet or that potential for everything to go wrong. So yeah, how do y'all feel about playing with first-timers?

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Comments

  • Paradisepair

    Paradisepair

    12 years ago

    Would love an edit function...

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Thank you..You guys have hit the nail on the head! Mindfullness, empathy and compassion for a first timer is the key and placing yourselves in a newbies shoes. My biggest fear is being manipulated into something for a couples own selfish needs and they don't have their Shit together like you two do. Makes a difference I think.for a new person like myself wanting to experience something beautiful with meaning. Will watch this topic. :) FOXY- Posted from rhpmobile

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I'm not sure how much "beauty and meaning" a third wheel gets foxy... In my experience... I tend to consider myself as little more than a dick for hire, when it comes to joining couples. Certainly a respected and hopefully a cherished dick... But I'm only a condiment to their main course... Tasty and highly desired, of course 😛😎 Not to say that I don't receive tenderness and compassion, but it's more centered around lust and passion. Jack Thompson's perspective would be interesting here :) I would be reluctant to play with a first timer couple, it's much easier for the couple to introduce a single or another couple. I'll sit back and wait to see what our OP and other quality couples have to say about what they want and expect from their third wheels, male and female... Do they want different things from them ? Hp xo 💌 Because you're worth it...

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  • On_Safari

    On_Safari

    12 years ago

    ~insert minefield of emotion here~ but if I could choose to have my first "couples experience" (requiring a partner though so bit of a moot point) with the thoughtful gentility coupled to the wantoness that I have for you guys having met you...."oh God!!! I think I just cum!!!" (Embarassed and blushing violently!!). Your newbie friends are most likely still in awe and glowing from the joy of the experience.....😳 Ummm just sayin' (grumbles about living too far away from any classy fun and beautiful people)

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    We have been with a few brand new couples and its not all that fun. You don't know when someone will flip out over seeing their partner with someone else, and they have. You don't know what someone is or is not ok with and aren't confident enough to say so. There can be performance issues with guys with all the nerves.In our opinion we won't be meeting any brand new couples anytime soon. We don't want to have to teach anybody, we want confident people where the night just flows. Yes we are aware that at some point someone took the patience with us, but right now, we don't have the same patience.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I have been in group situations with newbie men.... They often can't perform. Which is fine it's just stage fright etc. But its true you don't know a new person will react. Personally I prefer people who are a little experienced at least.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Thank you Superfoxy, I'm sure I would very much appreciate 'mindfulness, empathy and compassion' as a first timer with a couple & would be shocked to find myself manipulated for a couples selfish needs...this sort of experience could potentially stop newbies such as myself from putting themselves out there as it takes a lot of courage to get out there on your own...but I'm getting there! ;)- Posted from rhpmobile

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    at the Brissy Meet and Greet drinks night,any couple would be fortunate indeed to spend time with you both

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    you are making a grave mistake, though we have passed the teaching baton on to others who have followed in our path, we believe it is our given & unselfish right that we are the chosen ones to guide you & turn the chosen one - Miss Superfoxxy - over to the dark side.   Miss Superfoxxy, no-one has their shit together like us! we have years of experience of turning people to the dark side, and with you having been named as the chosen one by us, (which was some time ago we must remind you, and have already discussed with you in the first 3 messages we sent, which we have kept & these can be quoted to you if you so ask Miss Superfoxxy). train & turn you we will. WWIIIIIITTTTTHHHHHHHH LLLLLLLOOOOOVVVVVEEEEEEEE   this post is not about manipulating you into making the wrong choice, it is to manipulate you into making the right choice! we are the only ones who can guide you oh chosen one Miss Superfoxxy into the dark side, where you will glow in the dark.   mr funky - aka President of Miss Superfoxxy fan club oh.. also... mrs funky who will play a pivotal role & gladly & willingly & lovingly   we have our lear jet on stand by & can travel when the chosen one, Miss Superfoxxy, snaps her fingers.   our friends who have already posted here are wonderful we are sure but they do not & cannot know you as we do. remember i am the President of your fan club & your number official stalker

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I second that!!!! FOXY- Posted from rhpmobile

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Quoting 'Highpriority'I'm not sure how much "beauty and meaning" a third wheel gets foxy... In my experience... I tend to consider myself as little more than a dick for hire, when it comes to joining couples. Certainly a respected and hopefully a cherished dick... But I'm only a condiment to their main course... Tasty and highly desired, of course 😛😎 Not to say that I don't receive tenderness and compassion, but it's more centered around lust and passion. Jack Thompson's perspective would be interesting here :) I would be reluctant to play with a first timer couple, it's much easier for the couple to introduce a single or another couple. I'll sit back and wait to see what our OP and other quality couples have to say about what they want and expect from their third wheels, male and female... Do they want different things from them ? Hp xo 💌 Because you're worth it... HP, are you joining threesomes where all members are straight or is it a 3-play Bi threesome? the 2 experiences are so completely different to each other they cannot be compared.   A straight threesome, while wonderful for some, leaves us a little cold as this is when the chance of somebody feeling like a third wheel is the most typical. it doesn't need to be intentional & more often than not certainly isn't, but all 3 players must remain alert throughout the entire play & always ensure that all parties are being included equally. this can be difficult when a couple are including a single person. the dynamics have already been set & passion & lust can & often do take over any intended niceties.   A Bi threesome is when you can just abandon yourself. When all 3 players are on the same wavelength & limits are near non-existent, this type of grouping is mind-blowing. pleasure is given by all, to all, & the chance of anybody being the third wheel is non-existent. a couple can include a like-minded single and the dynamics will still be divided equally 3 ways. a single person is being invited to join 2 other people who are not looking for somebody to fit around a couple, but are instead looking for somebody who will add to the play which has been planned & bring a healthy amount of the ingredient needed to complete the 3-way bi group. you will definitely have the lust & passion, but there will also be the tenderness & compassion which will be shown to the invited guest as much as it is shown to the couple who planned the party.   mrs funky :)

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Good topic :) we have had both positive and negative experiences with "newbies" but we have also equally had positive and negative experiences with more experienced couples. Sure there may be some additional "hand holding" with newbies but the extra energy an excitement newbies can often bring to the occasion can make it wildly satisfying for all... We all have to start somewhere and there is a lot for newbies to consider but a little understanding, respect and a willingness for uncomplicated fun never goes astray...even for the experienced too :)

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I hear you mrs funky... Although my blood is roaring a bit 😘 I've been in situations with varying restrictions... And agree that the fewer restrictions the better for all. I felt from ms foxxy's post that she was seeking more than just the physical pleasure of the evening... I still maintain that even with a regular setup, you are still the third wheel, labor hire if you will. No one will (should) ever come between the couple emotionally, so on that basis I am a third wheel. As you say, sexually I'll play up to whatever limits are in place... All that said, my last experience left me a little sour (probably too strong an emotion) late in the evening one felt slightly left out and the other felt bad for taking over (my assumption...) it was all friendly, but finished early, and sadly I've never heard from them again and I think their profile has disappeared. Pity for me, because they were both genuine, quality and attractive people... I hope they can sort things between each other (whether they continue to play or not) Hp xo 💌 Because you're worth it...

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    WILL EVERYONE PLEASE REFRAIN FROM PROSTITUTING THEMSELVES @ THE FEET OF Rob_Ally, ParadisePair and cheekyarses !!! Fuck off to the back of the queue !!! I WAS HERE FIRST !! Hp xo 💌 Marking his territory...

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    We're still relatively new to this, but we've found it to be very supportive and genuine. Maybe we've been lucky, but we haven't found anyone to be pushy or rude. We're very much exploring our desires emotionally as well as physically and everyone we've played with so far has been great. They've respected our boundaries while encouraging us to try new things where appropriate. Hopefully we'll be able to pass our experiences on to new swingers too :) C and G- Posted from rhpmobile

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