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RHP

RHP User

M63

how to wear pants...

August 09 2008

i was talking to a mate, we'll call him tardy. when it became apparent he had no idea how to wear jeans. i was puzzled by this as he has reasonable style. he wears quite a bit of black. but adds a splash of colour with a dinosaur junior or an independent trucks tee shirt. i was explaining why he needed a man bag. mine has a phone, wallet, ear buds, memory sticks, marker pen, USB cable, glasses, keys, condoms, lube and an aircraft head phone plug adaptor. he said.. i just put my phone in my pocket... "what!!!!" i said.. "you can't do that, it makes the shape of your jeans on you bum look wrong. he just looked at me. clearly he has no idea. for one thing you should never put your phone and your keys in the same pocket. they will scratch the phone. i still have an old ngage i bought in 2003. it's brilliant!! it's my mp3 player, my radio, my data transport, portable game platform.. oh, and it's also my phone. now if my key's ever scratched it i'd cry. they are such a rare cool bit of kit, if genghis kan was alive he would invade australia to hunt me down and steal my phone. cool as it is, i do not want it making an unsightly bulge though my jeans on my bum line. tardy, however is very happy to have his bum deformed by wallets, keys, phones and the spare squirrel. i think this is because he's not yet 30. he will learn. LRE (shakin that non bumped arse)

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Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    TURN AWAY FROM THE N-GAGE!!! YOU STILL HAVE TIME!!!!! people we need an intervention here. dont get me wrong, it was a great idea and I respect it as the little platform that tried. Unfortunately a lack of decent titles and the fact that you could get a GBA and a couple of games along with another phone for the price it was back then. I think the n-gage has it's place though. On the shelf next to the dreamcast..... oh yes, jeans.... doesnt matter how you wear your jeans, personally i wear jeans almost everywhere and i find a manbag a little too bulky, i'd rather have a buldging pocket than a bulky bag. The keys / phone issue isnt a problem i have the phone in the left keys in the right, wallet in the back (tri fold doesnt leave it as bulky or uncomfortable) but hey it all comes down to your own style and aslong as you are comfortable with what you wear and how you wear it thats what will make it look best on you

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    LRE You are a good and wise friend to correct Tardy's sartorial deficiencies. Unfortunately you can lead a horse to water.... You can only hope that a nice girl will take pity on him and change his ways. You touched upon a major Men’s health issue.....Namely where do you keep all the shit you have to carry around with you and still look elegant. The man bag ( I assume the over the shoulder strap satchel) has a certain appeal but is generally not acceptable for anything other than casual dress. So, I give you for the more formal occasion the wrist strap bag. Made in fine leather (black, brown or crocodile) straight from the 70's. Big enough to hold the afro comb and a cheech and chong joint, not much money (every thing was cheaper in those days), condoms, cassette tape of Saturday Night Fever sound track and your white silk scarf when you where not needing it to trap some platformed heeled wench on the lighted dance floor. Yet small enough not to get in the way while you were doing the Hustle or liberating some lovely’s bikini panties in the dark couches at the back of the disco. Morf to the 21st century, they can be made in carbon fibre with thumb print locks. Have a built in 10MP camera, interface with your iPhone so that it doesn’t need to be touched by fingers sticky with vodka cruisers or ladies juices (or both), hold your stash of E’s, coke, meth, crack, laxatives in a self destruct compartment. Still need the condoms but they have to share space with the men’s moisturiser and SPF1000 face cream. Completed with a special quick draw credit card dispenser so you can pay for the flaming Bugatti (more expensive than a Lamborghini) with a twist of Rolls Royce cocktail that you have to buy in order to get into the lady’s g-string before you have realised you will be eating cup-a-soup for the next week in order to pay for the drink (She had better give good head). Can’t understand why the wrist strap bag hasn’t made a resurgence. Seed capital anyone ........ Ed PS. I was too young to own one.......bag envy? PPS. LRE you got your wish to have the post moved !!!!! PPPS. Your on for the single malt ..a man of taste as well as style

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    i hear and now fully understand the womans handbag thing. i've always not liked putting my hand in a woams hand bag lest i get forked tounge. i never considered it a sort of domestic balck hole before, but i hear where you are comming from.. LRE

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    My iPhone sits on my belt on a belt clip ;)

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    ""My iPhone sits on my belt on a belt clip ;)"" And after using one, I would suggest add "thrown in the back of my draw never to see light again" Kewl gadget...but please.......I give in a 3 out of 10 maxs

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    when we go out clubbing I wear a bumbag that houses most of the necessities. Phone/wallet/smokes etc that we use on the night. When slumming around in jeans all go in the pockets unless I am wearing a jacket. My Venus has her bags of course. Venus holds the keys lol.....I am not responsible at times.. Mars

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    Geez it's sad if Dogpatch ain't in the 3G reception area. Loves my iPhone though hate the box it came in. The twit who designed it must have thought it's cool to have the contents fall to the pavement on lifting it up. One way to guarantee a short life for the iPhone is for it to smash to the floor on opening the box.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    someone has too much time on his hands and frankly if you can't tell the difference between a bum and a phone............

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    snag's or what or do we have a culture of the Caring Undrestaning ninties Types here. check the acronims here ppl's. for one if you own a late modle car you should never put your keys in the same pocket as your phone. as the effects of the phone can upset your imobiliser on your keys. Go figure its all that magnetic field stuff. when i go out its key and wallet, and there never enough money in it to impress any one. my mobile is about damn i think 4-5 years old it is very small nokia and in the front pocket is not an issue. unless you believe the hipp about mobile being to close to the crown jewels! but then i dont need any more kids so its all good for me. where are all the real men gone to in this world, man bags jezzzz i thought a man bag was what ya crown jewels came in have fun ppl's mal

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    Seriously, back in my day which was say,,, about 5-6 year's ago, I really don't remember having to carry anything more than you're wallet and 3 key's on a key ring, now between the multiple security key's for the house front and back, work key's, the key to that special lady up until the police take em off you, the car and the car's immobilizer ,the brand new mini garage door button on the key cluster, the phone that count's for everything that Nasa back in the 70's would have thought came from outer space that if you use it for all that it's describes at the shop the battery only last for 1/4 of the time you really am wanting to need it, and I mean we now need all that it can do, so in that case you have to carry a spare MP3 player as it drain's way to much battery, cuz who want's to be caught on the train not doing anything, to not just the condom's but now were expected to have the lube as well as a few of you mentioned. I don't complain, all of which is described is essential now to perform, they even groan and doubt there action's if you don't have the lube, but the man bag is only fitting if you have the shoes and hair to go with it, the wrist strap is too bulky and it would go up to you're armpit today and the bum bag at the the club's-well- Mar's & Venus I hate to sound derogatory but what??? When I travel when I get the R&R it's even worse, so I carry my green canvas tool bag satchel from the mine's that is slightly rugged but not dirty slung across my shoulder, it look's like I'm a worker, not so fancy looking but still practicable it hold's a fair bit and it's got pocket's inside with a button flap not zipper cuz then it would be a handbag. Not for everyone but I don't do the backpack thing. P.S. Sorry but I love my N95 P.S.S If you would like to see me sporting my satchel (it even sound's good-satchel-) look in one of my pictures

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    bloody hell click, it sounds like i need to upload a pic of me and my man bag.. i wont be out done by a statchel.. LOL LRE (maybe0

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    17 years ago

    i have only 1 rule. no pants.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    I no longer carry a gym bag LRE.... now I put everything in my bike helmet. :p   Even if you do not own a motorbike, it's really kewl to carry around a bike helmet. Chicks dig it and having a bike helmet to put everything in doesnt ruin your bum line.... . :p   Hugs Stalky

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