M38
is it worth putting yourself out there sometimes?
April 23 2014
Comments
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RHP User
12 years ago
I would put myself out there again. I would at least want to discuss where you left off and open up some adult dialogue. There may have been a legitimate misunderstanding. You never know, with some open communication on the matter, it may make more sense to you both. ....and she is the gymnast
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RHP User
12 years ago
Louie.... Thanks for taking the time to offer such a detailed and well presented topic. On putting yourself out there.... there is only one 'you', and my point of view is you should ALWAYS be out there, doing your thing, exploring, enjoying and seducing and amazing the entire frikken world like the awesome badass muthafucka driving the steamtrain that you areBut most people simply don't. They ride the train instead. Do you want to drive, or ride?!! Do you want choices, or be handed decisions? TOOT TOOT!!! ;-) On the subject of the 'gymnast'..... Or anyone else for that matter..... watch what they do, not what they say. She left for someone else, in spite of the sounds which emanated from her mouth that sounded like relationship noises. She said 'next'.... and you were option B...and even that could have been only a maybe. So wouldn't it be better to put the Engineers hat on and power up the train, and if she wants to ride it to wherever YOURE going... then, you can see if you really want her (or the next 'hers') along for the ride. Do what do you think you'd prefer? TOOOOOOOOOT!!!!! :-) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Louie.... Thanks for taking the time to offer such a detailed and well presented topic. On putting yourself out there.... there is only one 'you', and my point of view is you should ALWAYS be out there, doing your thing, exploring, enjoying and seducing and amazing the entire frikken world like the awesome badass muthafucka driving the steamtrain that you areBut most people simply don't. They ride the train instead. Do you want to drive, or ride?!! Do you want choices, or be handed decisions? TOOT TOOT!!! ;-) On the subject of the 'gymnast'..... Or anyone else for that matter..... watch what they do, not what they say. She left for someone else, in spite of the sounds which emanated from her mouth that sounded like relationship noises. She said 'next'.... and you were option B...and even that could have been only a maybe. So wouldn't it be better to put the Engineers hat on and power up the train, and if she wants to ride it to wherever YOURE going... then, you can see if you really want her (or the next 'hers') along for the ride. Do what do you think you'd prefer? TOOOOOOOOOT!!!!! :-)
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sweetgem
12 years ago
I would rather be the train driver than a rider, like how DG put :-) I had put myself out there before, I ended up having myself cut and burned, plus a big slam and insult on my dignity! So sometimes it is not worth it to put yourself out there if it didn't work out the first time! A harsh lesson learned in my case. However, just because it did not succeed for me, it doesn't mean that it's not worthwhile for other people to try again :-) hence, my suggestion is, go with your first instinct, what it desires to do; imagine the consequences; and think thoroughly to see what would have you lost if it didn't work out again (as in if you got played and dumped again)? You're still young, you sure have a lot of time to bet and try things out, or to heal your heartache IF it was salt and lemon and bitter again :-) All the best OP, may the odds be in your favour this time :-) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
That's what life is all about, sometimes you ask a girl to dance. You need to lead, all men that I love to dance with know how to lead. Its much more exciting that way. However if she does not want to dance with you, if she went a couple of rounds and thought , that other fella dances better. then that other fella says, nahh sorry honey , what does she do? she stands in the dance floor and looks for plan B So you might like to give her another twirl to show her what she did not see the first time. Your fancy footwork, the way you slide that hand down to the small of her back, and pull her close and look right at her. Everyone stuffs up with relationships, some people dance around and around in circles. I put myself out there a few times, I actually divorced my husband and was separated for 12 years, but I looked across that dance floor and I thought, that old codger , he cant whisk me off my feet anymore but hey sometimes a slow waltz can be just as nice as a sexy tango. Go for it kiddo, pin your ears back and step into the ring we all get black eyes along the way, we get battered and bruised and spat out but the heart is a muscle , it needs some exercise. if you don't put it out there, you will end up on RHP , and your theme song will be Lonely , ever so Lonely LadyT in well worn dance shoes
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RHP User
12 years ago
Louie, Good for you on "putting yourself out here" by writing this honest , heartfelt post. It sounds to me like you have unfinished business with this girl that will probably continue to nag at you unless you do something. You say you are risking your "peace of mind and happiness" by perhaps pursuing her again......but I would say you don't have peace of mind while you're still thinking of her and wondering what might have been. When I am contemplating whether or not to 'put myself out there' over something in my life, I often pose the question (to myself)......'what's the worst thing that could happen'?? So , in your case, if you contact her - what's the worst thing that could happen ? Maybe she doesn't reciprocate your feelings , ok ,not great - but at least then you know for sure and you can put it to bed. Better than endless ruminating about what might have been if you had. Always put yourself out there Louie - it's called living. A ship is safe in a harbour - but is that what a ship was designed for ? No, it was made to be out on the high seas !! Good luck mate, hope it works out for you.
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madotara69
12 years ago
Go get her, tell her all the dirty things you would like to do with her, see how that goes. Her eyes will do the rest. Mado Tara xx
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RHP User
12 years ago
If she is in your headspace for all the right reasons then i think you owe it to yourself to find out. She has obviously had an effect on you, go and get your girl!!
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MsSuperFoxy
12 years ago
Louie, Do you know the absolute golden Number one rule?? You don't shit where you get your bread and butter from! FOXY
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madotara69
12 years ago
She does not work with him any more, she just came too the party.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Maybe she thought you were too nice, thought you were never going to got there in her immediate need. Just Sayin. You know what they say - it is the nice quiet ones you have to watch out for.....
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RHP User
12 years ago
This is about you.. Well in all my wisdom of being a RHP elder with respect for the youth - Go for it sonny. You like her. If you never go there you will never know. No regrets - RIGHT! xxx
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RHP User
12 years ago
I thought that question might come. Thanks for all the replies so far by the way! This question adds another dimension to the pickle unfortunately as it relates to how a relationship with this girl would be. She is a world champion gymnast, so she has no time due to training regimes. She also works and studies, and is constantly traveling overseas for competitions etc etc. As you can imagine this leaves very little time for a personal life. Gymnastics is her number one priority and nothing will change that. She has told me this and I can understand totally. Committing to a relationship with her would mean committing to someone with very little time for me. Not such an easy challenge. A difficult question to answer.... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Talk, feel the water, it may or may not work out, but I hate question marks hanging over my head. Yes you have to put your heart back on the chopping block again but you are more wary of knives this time. I ended up married for 10 years and had 2 awesome kids going back for a second sniff. If that doesn't scare you off, nothing will.
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RHP User
12 years ago
and had been keen for months, and she seemed to be thinking about a relationship with you an awful lot. Then she took up with another guy and that ended badly. It's just a matter of time for you two I'd say, just work out what you want and when, be ready to take charge and make it happen. Be patient and aware. Often I'll meet someone special and get a feeling that it's inevitable that we will be lovers and just a matter of timing. It could be this date, this week, this month, this year or later, but you know it's going to happen at some stage. This has happened a number of times throughout my life and it helps to look at and be amused by the big picture and not get too caught up or weighed down in the detail, especially when it's irrational detail. I'd keep in contact with her and look for the signs, in her actions more so than her words, be ready to act when it feels right.
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RHP User
12 years ago
"Trouble is, i genuinely liked her, and the feeling was very much mutual. She told me she dreamed about me and had been keen for months (we worked together). I was actually a little taken back by the way she spoke as it seemed she had been thinking about a relationship with me an awful lot for some time. " This statement said it all. As Inspirit said you had been out with her!! She had already displayed interest and you didn't act. Me personally, I'd let it go, and make sure that next time, you take the wheel of life and steer!!!! A good song by missy Higgins called steer, go listen to it!! (Thank you paintme) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Hey Louis, well written and good on you for putting yourself out there. I'd say look her up,you obviously liked each other,find out her side of the story,see if it makes sense. We all make mistakes,but,that being said it could be an indicator of things to come,so I'd be a little more inclined to put myself out there emotionally with her just yet. If she is keen,she will understand . Remember,your not the second prize...your the winner. We've all been there at some time,good luck with it all.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I meant LESS inclined to put yourself out there emotionally
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RHP User
12 years ago
to ask yourself is it worth the risk to you?....If she rejects you again,will you cope,?.....the only one who knows is you xx C
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RHP User
12 years ago
I would find something else to twist. In all seriousness - she is not that into you if she flicked you for some one else (you're a maybe not a YES) Come on - really! Sounds like you both might want too settle for second best? Clearly you do - Don't you think? You may suck at fishing as I do, though apparently there ARE plenty of fish in the ocean. In answer too your question - I do not put myself out there again. There is a saying "Fool me once ...... " Bye a puppy ;-)
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RHP User
12 years ago
Don't over analyse
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