meaningful relationships ??

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  Hi Kissablelips, My previous partner & i had sex on our 1st date, we stayed together for the next 6yrs. We often used to joke that had we not had sex, we probably wouldnt have ended up together as we were both so different. We ended things mutualy, neither with any regrets. We would have missed out on so much if we hadnt slept together. It all comes down to what ur comfortable with, so long as you have respect for yourself & choose partners who will also treat u with respect. It’s a shame there is still such stereotypical stigma attached to a girl who likes to satisfy her needs etc. I would certainly have more casual sex if it wasnt treated as such a bad thing.... Hope this makes sense as im falling asleep, lol, good luck & hope it helps! sweet_girl

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  Although there is nothing wrong with sleeping with someone on the first date and i doubt anyone would not consider a relationship if you did.I was allured to my wife by the fact we didnt.It was actually about 2 weeks before we did. She played hard to get and it intrigued me and that was 16 years ago. Probably a good idea to max out on the casual sex before settling down for a meaningful relationship. Good luck!

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  and it’s interesting, coz it’s all tangled up in attraction, desire, and emotion ... I think a basic rule is understanding in yourself whether you’re horny or looking for an emotional contact - sometimes you can have both, but they’re usually mutually exclusive until you’ve got to know your partner, their likes/dislikes, state of mind, etc. etc. On the other hand, I met a long term friend at a swingers party - we just clicked, and we’re still friends. I believe it is basically about confidence, and as well about understanding what it is that you want, and being clear about it to yourself.

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  Hi Kiss I don’t think there is a universal rule... but I think the key is self respect. Ultimately, a person should be able to hold their head high, regardless of the outcome. I’ve adopted the approach - when in doubt - play it safe and don’t. My circumstances are unusual, being in a non-monogomous relationship. I like to give the other person the opportunity to consider who they are getting involved with and my circumstances (and to get to know theirs). I can’t be dishonest, regardless of how tempting it might be to bullshit, or how my hormones (or theirs ) are raging. I’ve had situations where I have been sort of impulsive (that is - had prior permission from my wife in case things developed that way). Personally, I feel it is wonderful when sometyhing spontaneous happens, as long as the circumstances are right. I have refused for example when my date drank too much. I also prefer not to rush into one night stands, so I can get passed the "I’ll show my reportoire’ -you show me yours " ! So for me, I have my standards. I like to take my time, and allow my instincts and intuition to guide me. Luckily, I have had wonderful magical relationships. Cavelier3934

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  I’d start being a little worried if they ask for some fisting on the first date... :)

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  I’ve had so many one night stands in my younger years, I’ve lost count of how many! A few weeks ago, I’d had one (after refraining from it for quite a few years, in the hope of meeting that someone special and allowing myself time to get to know him before having sex with him). Anyway, we’d a great night of sex, doing it all night, every which way possible. Plus he was a great kisser, which added to the pleasure. The next few days, he’d told me, through another person, I mean, what the heck was he, if I was easy? As it had been a mutual thing for us to have sex on the first date, and we’d both been hanging out for it, the last thing I’d thought he’d say was that. So yes, unfortunately there are men out there who still think women who choose to have sex on the first date are sluts, whores, or just plain "easy" This has put me off having sex on the first date, maybe it’s a good thing, I don’t know, I just think what Mustang said was so true......to allow yourself time to get to know a person and explore their personalities a little, without the pressure of sex, as it can be so much more enojoyable. Also, I find when you go to meet someone for the first time, and you don’t plan on having sex with them on that first night, don’t drink, or just stick to one or two glasses. It helps!

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  Well unfortunately for Kazz that dude showed his true colours rather quickly, pity he didnt let slip before jumping into bed. What a mongrel, your good enough for a lay but not good enough for a relationship because you were "to easy" because you slept together on the first date. What does that make him? No gentleman for starters, and a really stupid dickhead for seconds. Fancy not wanting to go back for second or third helpings. Not to mention gutless for getting someone else to deliver the "bad news". Kazz your better off without that loser no doubt about that. Mustang PS I’m stoked that you quoted me, thanks

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  All I’ll add to that Mustang is that you should be a writer and write books as you definitely have a way with words! That guy wasn’t from Red Hot Pie by the way, I’d met him from RSVP, now he’s on Adult Match Maker, so watch out girls, he just might be on this site too!! I’ll do some investigating. By the way, check out this site: (It’s quite funny) Just copy & paste it into your web browser.

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  interesting topic kiss but in my case (roachie)...i met xaltau online on a friday night...went to her place the next night..... shagged our brains out for the next 18 odd hours.... and now ... 4 yrs later...2 kids and the best thing i have ever done in my life was to met her... who cares if you do or dont on the first date....each to their own i say

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  Yess its about RESPECTING urself 1st....unless ur just too dam horny..lol !! well guys ur on a winnner there! wait for aslong as u possibly can, that way they want you more & more & know your not using them for sex too! Girls do it & so do guys! Being freinds with OR knowing if its the special one is more important& will Stay important,rather than shagging them on the 1st nite& spoiling the unwrapped fun!!!......xxxx

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  There can be a whole range of meaningful relationships and this website can provide them, however I think the funniest is when someone registers themselves on RHP and in their profile they say they are not interested in any relationship at all. Even if you just chat you’re still having social intercourse. You don’t have to have sex to be connecting with someone. Hotsams

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  RHP User

  19 years ago

  Hi all, I think it totally depends on the individuals involved, but nine times out of ten its gonna be that clumsy uncomfortable sex that you get between strangers who dont know each other from a bar of soap. The best sex I’ve ever had I had to wait for but totally worth it!

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