partner wants threesome first timer worried will ruin relationship

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  my advise wud be NOT to do it if one of u has jealousy issues...it ruined my relationship ..swinging either breaks u or makes u and if 1 person has jealousy issues it will definitely break u

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  if jealousy is an issue, then tread carefully my friend.   discuss, discuss, discuss.   shyness is ok, we can all be a bit shy.   we talked till the cows came home before we jumped in.  we had our first 3some with my best friend after my hub planted the seed in my head and then i planted the seed in hers, and it spontaneously happened one night, first for all 3 of us.  I was totally comfortable with the whole idea of it, but only because i knew her.  BUT, I still had a flash of jealousy run through my head when he was in the throes of it with her...and i found myself internally talking to myself...rationalising my feelings.   the aftermath was far easier to deal with...i believe simply because i was so comfortable with my friend...i don't honestly know how I would have been if our first time was with someone else.   i guess the point is...yes, talk about it so you can be sure, be prepared for jealousy to come out at some point, but do try and find someone that you're totally at ease with for your first time.

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  In a totally vanilla world jealousy is a common and normal emotive reaction that we all feel when faced with the prospect of our partner enjoying a sexual experience with someone else.   Our advice, and from a totally experienced point of view is that we both shared the exact same mental hurdles in our earlier stages of enjoying alternative sex partners.   If you both have a common interest in this lifestyle, and you communicate abundantly you will more often than not cure the thoughts of jealousy if it is meant for you.   We say "give it a go" and you will see how your walls break down quickly when you realise there is no common threat just a whole lot of pleasure for you both!

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  if it's the lady with the jealousy issues, perhaps consider inviting a guy into a threesome first so you can "aclimatise" her to the idea...if you know what I mean...   HotAzIce is correct, swinging can have the potential to ruin a relationship if you're not careful

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Dont do it, or if you do, like as already been mentioned, get another guy. Why is it always an extra girl in these 3 somes i wonder.

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  There are plenty of couples on RHP that are happy to have same room play, this would take the pressure off you both but still be very exciting for you. Hell, just meeting up with another couple and chatting over a meal and a drink can be a lot of fun! There's a lot of nice people to meet. Don't rush it, enjoy the journey, and talk to each other.

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  my advice is to take it step by step   and yes let her touch a guy first before you touch a girl   then again 2nd time just touching, no kissing or fucking yet, maybe let her suck a guy and you lick a girl after she started and make sure you dont swap in the beginning but do it all together. keep giving her attention thru the whole experience.   if you have patience you will be the winner at the end ;-)

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  I wanted to try a threesome since i was a wee lad, what man doesn't like the idea of two ladie's together. We talked and talked, untill one day my wife say's hey if you try a threesome with a guy first, I'll try threesome with a woman.   Blood boiled over, I was upset and felt guilt and lealousy all in one hit.   No way I said.   One day a good friend came over and we had a few drinks and wam it happened.   I did feel jealious and guilty afterwards I will tell you. But have to admit that it changed our life as I have more trust in my wife now then I did and I also know now that sharing one another is very exciting and rewarding if treated as only sex not as being disloyal.   these day's would rather be with a couple as we all have something in common.   But will have to say if it is hard for her to experiance these thing's, then it is possible you will only just wreck your relationship. It is quite hard to ajust to if you or she has any jealious streak. Find somebody you feel comfortable with and go slow.   And remember it is only for the fun of it you are doing it , not to find a new partner.   Good luck and Enjoy.

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Hi gccouple4u here i just wanted to say thanks for all the feedback, we havnt decided to do anything just yet and rather wait for the right time like a non planned situation and take it from there... Has anyone got suggestions on what club would be a good introductory night, to watch or play privately without judgement?    Thanks i am learning alot just reading the forums..

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  We went to a brothel for our fist experience.  The young lady was excellent and looked after us very well.  It is a bit cold and like a business transaction, but if she just want to try a ladies touch it might be a good start. You don't have to have sex with the other lady you my be happy to receive oral or just please your partner.Good luck.

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