M60
Mixed Messages
March 29 2013
Comments
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RHP User
13 years ago
Everyone should be treated with respect. Women choose to display their sexuality in different ways that doesn't mean they are easy or promiscuous. Hmmm I wonder, is this is a generation thing? Thought you old grumpy guys would understand that by now??? See now stereotyping people isn't really fair now is it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I wonder, how exactly do you treat a slut? To be honest I only allow that privilege to my close friends. (˘❥˘)
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RHP User
13 years ago
really what the hell is a slut? A woman in charge of her own sexuality? yes names and pictures can generate a response , ie picture of guy in bathroom with sad cock in hand and mums curtains up ther and his towel on the floor...............is there a name for that one? act like a slob and be treated like a slob? I have to agree, I have up naked pictures of myself but like to think of myself as arse with class, that being said I am there to turn men on, so if thats being a slut so be it. This does not mean that I will fuck every man with a hard on. Just dont have the time at the moment
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RHP User
13 years ago
How would you like to be treated in return ? therein lies your answer to what I thought was obviously blatant...
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RHP User
13 years ago
That is my fav photo of you ..glad to see it up again..
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RHP User
13 years ago
OP that you have indicated this thought in a previous post.I think of myself as socially sexual,or in common parlance a slut.What is wrong with being a sexually adventurous woman?Or in your opinion, is that only the perogative of men,or man whores if you prefer a derogatory term and of course men can be sluts too. If you don't like the wording on a profile ot the photos,scroll on.There are heaps of male profiles that I certainly think leave a lot to be desired,but no doubt they will appeal to someone. I have found that the main difference between what people say here,or how they present themselves as opposed to the more''vanilla '' sites,is that people are more honest here about who they are and what they want.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Are we still really in THAT place?? OP I'm going to assume you're trying to stir the pot to amuse yourself. The alternative - that you're a simple-minded, judgmental, sexist cad - would be unlikely in this day, surely?! People are multi-faceted. We all have many aspects of our personality, our lives, our interests and so on. I'm very sexual. I like the chance to express just a little bit of that, anonymously, on this adult site. I have semi-naked, and sometimes naked, photos. Does that make me a slut? Available for any man who clicks his fingers and decides he feels like a fuck? I'm not here to meet up with men for casual sex, I'm ultimately looking for love and commitment, I'm not interested in gang bangs, phone sex with strangers and yada yada. Does that make me a prude? A boring root? Hardly. I'm neither. I'm me, and I'm happy being me. OP, the way you choose to judge someone and treat someone, based on knowing almost nothing about them, is a reflection on you, not on them.
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RHP User
13 years ago
for treating a woman like a slut because she had some sexy pics and celebrates her sexuality? Geez, what pray tell, did you say?
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beebs
13 years ago
because that takes the responsibility away from the treater to the treatee, we need to take responsibility for our own actions and not lay them at the foot of whoever our actions are impacting upon. It is good that there has been such a big discussion on victim blaming online lately, in particlar on twitter. I hope that attitudes are changing.
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RHP User
13 years ago
You know I was at drinks night recently and at the end of the night when we were all deciding where to go next. One guy pipes up "lets all go to the hotel room and fuck". I mean exc-fucking-use me???? This guy had hardly spoken to any of the girls all night but since we are all on an adult website well, he just assumed we were all gagging for him. Some men don't get it I am afraid. Women express themselves more openly on RHP and are more open about their sexuality and may even show their crude side. Oops sorry about that. But that doesn't mean that they will sleep with just anyone or that they have no standards. Or that they don't deserve your respect singlefyi. Is this your attitude towards sexually open women though? This question says a lot about you actually.
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RHP User
13 years ago
How do you treat a 'slut' differently from other women (who, presumably, are not sluts), do you say different things? Behave differently? What's the difference? Honest question.
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RHP User
13 years ago
... and lack of respect. I was chatting to a "gent" (not) on a vanilla site today. This was our first (and last) conversation :-( After the initial "hi, happy easter" and exchange of names he launched into a blatantly vulgar and explicit sexual rampage. To say I was miffed was an understatement :-( My response: "Really? Do you always speak to women like that? I find it very disrespectful". Then came the abusive name calling. I was unable to respond as he then blocked me! Yep, I reported the pr**k. Now this was a vanilla dating site and no, I don't have a provocative profile or pics. Even if I did it doesn't warrant that kind of behaviour. Quite frankly I think it sucks :-( KK
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RHP User
13 years ago
YOU GET WHAT YOU ADVERTISED FOR If a person's profile (note the gender neutral) creates a profile that basically says ".. all I want is a fuck, I don't even need to know your name .." I hope they don't come in here complaining, whinging and crying when they get the "Let's fuck now" emails. What else can a reader gleam from the profile except exactly what the person has written. I hate to inform some of the ladies here but there are female profile on this site that say just that, just as there are male profiles saying the same thing. To read said profile, the only conclusion the reader can ascertain is the person just wants sex, he or she doesn't care where it comes from, who it comes from, when it comes. TR: Yes if the profile is from a woman that might indicate she is intuned with her own sexuality, as long as you afford the same consideration to a male profile saying the say thing and don't judge him as just a root rat/player! There are too many on this site (again neutral gender specific) that want to portray themselves as some type of sexual gods then get all upset when someone treats them exactly like that.
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RHP User
13 years ago
They may have a risqué name, photo, description and desires but they are still a person with feelings, morals, thoughts dreams, etc etc and as such should be treated with respect and dignity. Pusscat xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
I'm assuming you've received knock backs and are pissed due to said ladies profile and then her negative response....??? Here's the thing we're not all waiting for your invite for a shag... some of us would prefer to get to know the guy, perhaps actually like the guy... you know have some sort of connection or chemistry going on.... The term 'slut' doesnt bother me in the least, if anything i think it should be worn with a badge of honor - to me she is liberated, in touch with her sexuality and loves sex... So what???? But your words OP make my skin crawl.... they are dripping with contempt and disrespect.
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RHP User
13 years ago
that we still haven't moved past this whole Madonna/whore mentality... why is is ok for men to express themselves openly (and at times, extremely poorly and crudely) and brag about their sexual prowess, history and conquests and be thought of as some form of hero within their social circle or beyond, yet when a woman does similarly, she is pilloried?? I don't want to turn this into a rant, because it's not... but your profile says you're mindful and empathic, so I'm puzzled as to why you would pose this as a serious question... and how would one tell the difference between a slut (to use your pejorative) and a woman who has a good grasp on who she is sexually and isn't afraid to seek it out? Are we not adults? I think OP, that the collective rebuttals that you've just received would show that your approach here is way off the mark - everyone, whether as a result of their presence on here or in their daily lives deserves to be treated with dignity and respect - you never know who you're talking to, some of the women here that I've met, the are exceptional women when you meet, and have lives which make ours pale in comparison.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I find it quite disturbing that you even have to ask this OP.Quoting 'woody_pusscat' They may have a risqué name, photo, description and desires but they are still a person with feelings, morals, thoughts dreams, etc etc and as such should be treated with respect and dignity. Pusscat xxxAs Pusscat had said - there is a person behind the pics and words. I only get the "you're in a sex site - bend over!" attitude from disrespectful men and I steer so far away.Treat her with respect and dignity and you might get the chance of treating her like a "slut" (whatever that means).
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RHP User
13 years ago
Why can we not be respected for being who/what we are ...human ... instead of having *tags* put on us..... There are no other words i detest more than having to hear / read the words mole-slut-cunt-whore being applied to as a reference to a person .. particularily women. What is it that defines a person being *a slut* . Is it because we are on this site or similar... A recent encounter with a guy from here via emails and text seem to be proceeding well... until he in a text whilst aranging to meet ... requested / expected of me ..not only a kiss on first meet ... but also a blow job ... He is now .... in block.- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
I think it was on here that we read the definition of "slut" that being " a woman with the morals of a man"nuff said, lol
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RHP User
13 years ago
My use of the term "Slut" was not ment to be gender specific. Good to see all the woman ASS U ME ing. What a nasty lot. Real quick to judge. Power to you all
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RHP User
13 years ago
I am inclined to think maybe that post just came out wrong OP? Once a comment like that hits a bit of oxygen around here it tends to become an atomic bomb (and well... you're the man of the moment)!Maybe you could have given a bit more thought to the information as the post was brief and a bit obtuse?From what I can gather you were trying to say, "do people judge others from their profile name, pics, description, degree of sexual content, etc"? Of course, naturally, everyone on the site does that as a first point of contact or judgement call. We are all doing it to varying degrees everyday. Your ie, example which you used "Act like a slut, get treated like one". Has obviously not gone down very well. Although you have used it as an example you have not claimed that you actually do this at all to women. People have reacted because they have attached the impact of everything in that sentence to a single word "Slut"! People have taken offence because of the negative connotation they associate with the word. I think 'consistency12' is right in pointing out to us all as to why have we not moved past the whole madonna/whore mentality or what I call madonna/whore split or complex? Of course it's 2013 and a lot more people are aware these days and have done the necessary 'work' on themselves and taken very deep responsibility for their own issues and healing. But even so people, and society in general, are still dealing with the fallout of the wounding around their own sexuality and that of the collective. What I would add though, to what 'consistency12' has pointed out, is that this complex does not just hinge on the men. They are not solely to blame! It is also very apparent in women too who are often just as wounded and unconscious in their behaviour and their role here, in their relationships and in the community. It's a collective problem, it's nothing new, and everyone needs to step back and take responsibility for their own crap and projections.I had to say that as I'm just so over the blame game. It's just not even where it's at for me any more?Next!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Yes, your post was gender neutral. Yes, we women assumed you meant women. The point remains though that you've suggested the cause of someone expressing their sexuality strongly justifies the effect of you treating them like a slut. And it's that point which most of us have taken exception to, because, as many said - how YOU treat someone is about YOU, your values, your sense of decency etc. Don't be distracted by the gender question and lose the real message we're offering ;)
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RHP User
13 years ago
who is the preverbal 'we' you were referring to?
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RHP User
13 years ago
who is the preverbal 'we' you were referring to?
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'SINGLEFYI' If in a prolile a person has a risque name, photo, description and disires why do we get canned for treating them that way? ie: Act like a slut = getting treated like one. Your thoughtsMy use of the term "Slut" was not ment to be gender specific. Good to see all the woman ASS U ME ing. What a nasty lot. Real quick to judge. Power to you all Hmmm, it's true you weren't gender specific in your OP... but let's see, you could have explained nicely that you didn't mean to be gender specific and recognised that you insulted a whole gender, the gender most specifically related to being called sluts. Even men took that on in this thread. You could have recognised the lighter comments in response to your OP. Hmmm, I can't remember the last time someone got canned for treating a man that way. All I can think of right now is Stalky who would love to lay claim to the word slut lol.Seriously, I still like some formalities on the way to fucking... even if I am a slut who likes to put across a slutty personalty in the way of my name, photo, description and desires. Oh no, hang on a minute, that's just being open and honest about my sexuality. It's your perception that makes it slutty. You know, male or female, I still have an issue with the tone of your post. Peachy
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RHP User
13 years ago
All the women! All the women ... assuming .... My dear singlefyi .... yiu might clearly hsve a reading receptive disorder as well as an expressive disorder ...... ir are they both a deliberate product of your id name.... SINGLE FYI..... FYI .... the term slut over the years has been mainly tho not exclusively ... but mainly targeted it women .... and some become nasty .. possibly due to the innappropriate tags and approach applied to them by other people ... not people not MEN as women can ALSO be Bullies and target other women with the term and treatnent of Slut ...... yes it does occure in the reverse but not to the same extent. So .... Not ALL women ASS UM EE.... but my interpretatation is that if someone generalises ... and treats inappropriately due to receptive disorder then you remain in isolation ... And maybe fyi- single ... jmo- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
that a lot of men(NOT ALL) think that because we have a profile on this site we just want to fuck. So if by your perception the profile screams slut that person should be treated like a slut. What about the profile that screams Lady/Gentleman? Will your correspondence to them be worded differently. My experience here is that it doesnt matter what you put on your profile there are those that think this is a SEX site and nothing more so they can just contact you and totally ignore what you have written on your profile. The great thing about RHP is that it allows people to be more open sexually and look for whatever it is they want in their life. FYI we are not here to be free prostitutes for tight arse stingy immature males............................unless we want to be :) Just remember, you catch more flies with honey. Everyone likes sweet words even Sluts :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
He has been knocked back by a male slut who has sexy photos .... It. Is all about. Approach ... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
This place isn't a brothel young man....- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
I have to generalize to all your responces otherwise I could be looked upon as a stalker. My "subject" was a ment to be a start of a conversation and thought provoking, not just a question. My choice not to put in "gender specific" was planned. All people jugde based on their past experiances as a starting point with any new aquaintance, myself included naturally. I DO like ALL your comments as they are your own and everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I do believe all off us can be fine upstanding "People in the Street and Freaks between the Sheets" if thats your choice. Straight acting for want of a better word is classy to me
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RHP User
13 years ago
some people (woman and man) like to be treated as sex toys or s*&^s but generally the setting / mood needs to be rightI have come across a few profiles which would suggest the subject of the profile is purely after 'slam bam thank you mam / sir' type arrangementthe response to these profiles, for those that do, will generally be contextualised or sent with a similar slant to try and make the connection or show similarities this is where the ice becomes thin and if one does not tread carefully they can find themselves breaking through the crust and end up in the ice cold waterrespect and decency it always a good moral gauge when considering a response do not type anything you would not say to someone face to face is another PS: OP Brave or silly for posting it I still cant work out which
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'You know I was at drinks night recently and at the end of the night when we were all deciding where to go next. One guy pipes up "lets all go to the hotel room and fuck". I mean exc-fucking-use me???? This guy had hardly spoken to any of the girls all night but since we are all on an adult website well, he just assumed we were all gagging for him. Some men don't get it I am afraid. Women express themselves more openly on RHP and are more open about their sexuality and may even show their crude side. Oops sorry about that. But that doesn't mean that they will sleep with just anyone or that they have no standards. Or that they don't deserve your respect singlefyi. Is this your attitude towards sexually open women though? This question says a lot about you actually. who came to the couples club and thought that because he included himself with a single girl to come in as a couple, he was then intiteld to fuck her. The woman was more than happy to pay her own single girl entry, and offered to pay the guy fo rher share but he said no. after that he got very shitty that he was not going to get some from her, or from the other women in the group Women of RHP are NOT free hookers, so men you need to take that ancient way of looking at sexual powerful women out of your pea brain. In my day if you wore a low top or were a bit flirty with men you were a slut. If you bent over at work your boss would pinch your arse if you looked a little bit sexy. Seems to me we are progressing very little even on RHP, men still make asumptions about women who like sex with stangers, build a bridge....get over it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
:-) KK
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RHP User
13 years ago
...mental muscle again & AGAIN & A-G-A-I-NOnce is never enoughOh you wonderfully smart & intelligUnt peopleWords flowing like nectar..........thoughts, ideas and concepts bought to life in Arial fontEvery day is Debate DayI envy you all~~f~~
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'tuscanred' remember the guywho came to the couples club and thought that because he included himself with a single girl to come in as a couple, he was then intiteld to fuck her. The woman was more than happy to pay her own single girl entry, and offered to pay the guy fo rher share but he said no. after that he got very shitty that he was not going to get some from her, or from the other women in the group I was amazed at the guy's attitude, and his anger even worried me a bit. Never again.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Your question is if a person has saucy photos and has expressed what they like sexually why do we get canned for treating them like a slut. That is your question. I think regardless of gender you have been answered loud and clear. No it's not okay and that is why you get canned and why women complain on the forums about being treated with no respect. As for Mooka's comment. If a women states she is up for it and doesn't care about your name. Well okay go ask her for sex if that is what you want. She may, may not say yes. I think most guys could only dream of being hounded for sex, being used for sex, and being pinched on the bum etc. but in my experience even for men they don't like it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
The word slut still has very negative connotations for most people. When the word is used most people assume that it is being used in a derogatory way and usually against women. Hence your strong reaction. Sorry, men that like to treat women this way bore me. They are usually not good with women at all. :(
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RHP User
13 years ago
By SLUT I assume you mean (Sexually, liberated, unassuming & tantalising) then I have no problem being called a slut. Oh my wife has no problem being called one either, under the same connotation... A lot of guys are such hypocrites, if a woman shows the same interest in sex they do she is branded as a slut or nympho, women enjoy sex as much as guys, otherwise we would have to do a lot of masturbating… Besides women get stuck with the baby, literally, I love kids but would not want to push out something the size of a bowling ball. So consider yourself lucky next time a women consents to having sex with you, even if you have been married to her for many years, if you get a knock back, I would assume it is your fault, don’t be a jerk, go find someone who will have sex with you and remember not everyone likes you, thinks you are beautiful or indeed “God’s gift to women”. We all like and do things different. Hope you find what you are looking for…
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RHP User
13 years ago
You may have been referring to both sexes in your OP (or you deliberately left the specific reference out so you could say that), but we all know which sex is the one that is judged much more harshly over their sexual activities, and that the word 'slut' and similar terms are most often targeted at. The double standard is still very much in existence. I've been called a whore by men on this site, they obviously feel that because I have a profile on here (and yes with risque pics and descriptions), that must mean that I will fuck anyone. Strange then that I haven't had sex for over a month.You seem to be a reasonably intelligent person, I'm sure you must have known the reaction your post would generate. But even if we take it as being a gender-neutral question the answer doesn't change and the posters before me have outlined the reasons why. And anyway, I'm still puzzled about the whole 'treating someone like a slut' thing, and what that actually entails
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RHP User
13 years ago
+ =
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RHP User
13 years ago
You have raised an either/or question and people do tend to run with it, take it personally or turn it on themselves (like a sacrificial lamb.) Anyone familiar with 'lady in public, whore in the bedroom' will understand your question. Some won't want to contemplate what you are really on about because they just hear one word and react. So the division continues. I was not personally offended by your post because It just does not enter into my mind that I, or any other woman for that matter, is well....a slut? It all comes down to being secure in your own sexual identity and the duality of being human both in yourself and others. I myself have never been treated in a derogatory way by any man who has approached me on this site. It just does not happen? I believe in the law of attraction, 'have self respect and respect is given', 'give respect and you are respected in return'. It's a two way street.Personally I took it to mean I was a Sensual, Luscious, Underrated, Tantragini. As it's what I think and do that determines my life. What others think of me is none of my business.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'deepbluesumthing'You have raised an either/or question and people do tend to run with it, take it personally or turn it on themselves (like a sacrificial lamb.) Anyone familiar with 'lady in public, whore in the bedroom' will understand your question. Some won't want to contemplate what you are really on about because they just hear one word and react. So the division continues. I was not personally offended by your post because It just does not enter into my mind that I, or any other woman for that matter, is well....a slut? It all comes down to being secure in your own sexual identity and the duality of being human both in yourself and others. I myself have never been treated in a derogatory way by any man who has approached me on this site. It just does not happen? I believe in the law of attraction, 'have self respect and respect is given', 'give respect and you are respected in return'. It's a two way street. Personally I took it to mean I was a Sensual, Luscious, Underrated, Tantragini. As it's what I think and do that determines my life. What others think of me is none of my business. Exactly "What others think of me is none of my business" I do value other's opinions and that's all they will ever be. Other peoples opinions
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RHP User
13 years ago
should not be part of anyone's vocabulary.... Full stop, end of lecture.
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RHP User
13 years ago
You say "Slut", I say "Bye".
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RHP User
13 years ago
...but I still Expect Respect ! Everyone is a Mirror . You get back exactly what you put in. GG♒- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' Everyone should be treated with respect. Women choose to display their sexuality in different ways that doesn't mean they are easy or promiscuous. Hmmm I wonder, is this is a generation thing? Thought you old grumpy guys would understand that by now??? See now stereotyping people isn't really fair now is it. I can see you point of view OP, one would assume one would interact in such a manner as the female profiles suggest. But that doesn't mean One must do so. It is hard to determine the correct way to treat women .. ESPECIALLY strangers, without being "canned" as you put it.I have never been canned in all my 8-9 years of RHP lifestyle, mainly because i always sit back, and watch them interact with their friends, to work out what's best, and what's not.. on top of the most important thing: respect. And then slowly inserting myself into their social circle, just enough for them to feel comfortable and understanding me with whatever I commented. Trouble with people coming into this site first time, is that they automatically assume it is a devil's playground where anyone can "snap" anyone into submission to suit their own pleasure, instantly (much like paying a hooker for her services). As alot of responders have said, behind each nicknames, therein lies a person.Something to think about.. I suppose :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
OP, I'm still at a loss to work out what you want to know, even after your clarifications and admonishments of other posters. As luckdragon has asked - how do you treat these folk you've determined are "sluts"? What cannings are you talking about? From whom? And what does make a slut? Your last little ideogram perhaps makes it clearer... this strange contradiction of outward sanctity and inward unrestraint. That's a pretty tall expectation, and perhaps not a healthy one. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
.. with the ladies on this one. Just because they express their sexuality on here doesn't automatically make them any lessor woman than those who choose not to be here... My guess is the women on here give a insight of what they can be with the right person. Not for just anyone.. Guys who assume all women on RHP are here for their benefit , think again. The mating game is the same either here or out in the real world.. Labelling a woman a slut here suggests this is the way a man thinks in the real world.
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's so apparent in forum threads like this one that there are some very wounded women commenting on a regular basis. They are increasingly prevalent on the threads and are all too ready to 'man bash' at the drop of a hat using double standards when it suits them and then crying foul when it doesn't. It is so obvious and little wonder that a lot of men are as confused as ever and are just too scared to point this out or say anything about it? Not to mention the men who support this kind of behaviour who are at best just wishful thinking and at worst deluded about the safety of their own status which doesn't really help the cause for anyone. Those males who do want more honesty and directness in confronting the white elephant are continually dismissed, while if you are a woman who not only understands what true 'equality' means but walks her talk daily then, by the same token, your opinion is often not welcome. Just paying lip service to it is not good enough if you can't follow through with your behaviour towards each other from the deepest part of your being. Would it be okay with you if your best friend blew smoke up your arse? It certainly isn't okay with me. Or are you all perfect too! I'm not! It's about time everyone got over themselves and manned up, womanned up about the part they are playing in the dynamic of a non-gender specific problem which affects us all.
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RHP User
13 years ago
"You go to bed with a disgusting dog..expect to wake up with Fleas". I get your Topic Question OP... Funny how it way of Topic cause you used one word. Am over reading Forums when this happens and agree with you on that Deepblue. Foxy - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
All this talk of respect - how can you respect just words on a screen? Respect, as a human trait is not a given emotion, it has to be earned, it is never assumed. How the hell can you respect someone you have never met and more importantly, know nothing about??? Deepblue hit the proverbial nail on the head yet again. If a guy only has a photo of his cock or sends a 'lets fuck' message he is immediately labelled a fuckwit, a player or whatever by most of the females here. Yet apparently if a woman has a similar profile, she is 'exercising her sensuality', 'empowering her womanhood', "being honest to all' or some other jingistic crap. The responses have been very typical of the forums, some women feel they can say anything and woe any male that tries to put forward his own thoughts. The OP fucked up because he used the "S" word, which is apprently very emotive when used by a man (but seems okay when used by a woman to describe herself or another woman - just spend some time in the chat room here). If he would have simply said that the type of profiles he was describing, is, in his opinion, a major turn-off, no one would have had damn thing to bitch about although I dare say some would have tried!
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RHP User
13 years ago
it doesn't really matter what is in a persons profile,it is about how you choose to treat others.Even if a man or woman has a profile that I find truly awful I would never send them a message that was disrespectful. Surely a'' thank you no, ''would be sufficient if they contact you.However if you have contacted them and said sexually explicit things based on your perception of their ''sluttiness'' and they do not respond well,I am surprised that you are surprised.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Examples 1/ Used in the bedroom is HOT, dam HOT, makes me hornier when said to me!!!!! 2/ When my ex husband would repeativly say to my daughter "How's the dirty Sl*t going?"-that to me is not ok.....really innopriate tone and how it was said. If you ask me was dam rude and had a hide....LOL my daughter one day asked him to explain what he ment and said "Dad you like sex, you're an adult and want to be treated with respect??"he Said "yes". she then replied "well dad, mums the same and please don't ever call her that again to me" LOL threw him for a sixer and was lost for words!! Never has he called me that to her again........ I guess what I am trying to say is...sometimes it can be taken in wrong content at times. :-( Foxy
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RHP User
13 years ago
You don't like women much do you? Men with cock pics sending out those "wanna fuck messages" don't respect women. Or they are a little deluded I think... I would have thought they wouldn't get a huge response?? But I am just guessing that, it is a numbers game after all so you never know they may be getting more than lots of us. I still reply politely though. I know that the image I portray means that some people will make that assumption that I am easy but to be honest I don't think I have had much of that. Most of my messages are respectful. Now I am pretty sure the a woman on this thread beating the drum for the men has actually been pretty harsh of her commentary of men in the past. Double standards. Sometimes you never know where you are with people in the forum as they change their mind so often. LMAO.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Yes male profiles with close up cock shots as their profile pic are a turn off, and they get whinged about on the forums. But to me it's also a turn off when a woman has a close up shot of her clit / vagina, I see nothing remotely sexy about that (would be different in real life under the right circumstances ). The OP asked whether people having 'risque' profile pics and descriptions means that they are acting like sluts and hence can be treated as such. But people having these types of pics and 'risque' descriptions - whether they be male or female - doesn't mean that they are sluts or that they are even acting like sluts (how can you assume that someone is a slut based purely on pictures and words?? You have no idea how that person is and acts in real life). And let's face it, if you could judge someone as a slut based on those things, the majority of people on this forum would be given that label. So in direct answer to the OP, no you can't treat people as sluts based on profile pictures and descriptions. Well, that's my opinion anyway.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I disagree. The word slut does have a very negative connotation and I don't think it is fair that you are woman bashing because woman have taken offense to the word. Lets be honest now. Was singlefyi really asking hey why are people canned for treating others as sensual, luscious, underrated, tangarani. So you really believe that was the question?? I don't think so.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Woman = women. :-/
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RHP User
13 years ago
Very well said. You echo my beliefs exactly... Specially the comment re wounded women. I,ve been subject to 'man bash ' by some of these wounded. No matter what I had to say ' they looked for a way to dismantle it to suit what it was they wanted to believe. Good to know there are still women out there that say it as it is and don't discriminate. You just restored my faith... Jay
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RHP User
13 years ago
I don't think you have been man bashed? Not that I could see but I don't read a lot of the forums. From what I have seen people have reacted to you as a person. Not because you are a man. Well that was my perception anyway. Lots of people are stereotyping here aren't they? Men and women. It's a shame. :(
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RHP User
13 years ago
So if we have profile pictures which look like a job interview we would be treated differently? But you are right Mooka, Deepblue and Singlefyi I do make assumptions based on your pictures and forum contributions. To me you are all very serious and don't like to joke around. Fair enough that is you... Or not as of course I am a only going off very limited one sided information after all. I suppose if I were to send you a message it would be very formal. I think you are missing the point though. Just because someone is different to you doesn't mean they deserve to be treated poorly. This is the way the OP's question was worded. Stop trying to change the subject and once again blame women.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'You don't like women much do you? Men with cock pics sending out those "wanna fuck messages" don't respect women. Or they are a little deluded I think... I would have thought they wouldn't get a huge response?? But I am just guessing that, it is a numbers game after all so you never know they may be getting more than lots of us. I still reply politely though. I know that the image I portray means that some people will make that assumption that I am easy but to be honest I don't think I have had much of that. Most of my messages are respectful. Now I am pretty sure the a woman on this thread beating the drum for the men has actually been pretty harsh of her commentary of men in the past. Double standards. Sometimes you never know where you are with people in the forum as they change their mind so often. LMAO. Meeka, where does it say I don't like women, yet again you are assuming you know all yet come out saying very little! First you attack me (well that was a given) then of course you accuse any woman who has the audacity to disagree with you of having double standards! What I don't like are people who have double standards, people who think they can say anything solely based on the misguided thought that because they are of one particular gender everyone will agree with them. So tell me, if men with cock shots etc don't respect (a word that some here simply misuse badly) women, then it must be true of women with similar shots who treat men bad - surely they don't respect men!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'mooka' All this talk of respect - how can you respect just words on a screen? Respect, as a human trait is not a given emotion, it has to be earned, it is never assumed. How the hell can you respect someone you have never met and more importantly, know nothing about??? Seriously? So you have no respect for people you meet for the first time? That makes me wonder how you talk to strangers. I work with drug addicts, some them them rather unpleasant at times. But I will always give them the respect I expect from them. Freya says it well, treat others based upon your own morals, not based upon what they project. Why lower yourself and make both of you look bad? And yes Deepblue, there are a lot of wounded women/people on here, just as there are many defensive, jaded and angry ones, some on very high horses. Pointing it out does not make it better though.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Mooka, we have a civil society because there is a presumption of respect - for dignity, for rights, for personal freedoms. I can only presume you treat everyone like a cunt until they've "earned" something from you. Sad for you. (I never, *ever* use that word, either, btw, but it feels right in this context.) There is a whole lot of debate about what is not the topic. Yes, this place has wounded women and this place has wounded men, and this place encourages some double standards. But, the OP offered and sustained a blanket opinion which it would be folly to think wouldn't be taken at it's extreme. The OP (a man) said sluts should be treated as sluts. That is shorthand for loose women deserve poor treatment. There are a zillion contexts in which slut is OK, or has been reclaimed, or is even sexy. The op knew what he was doing. Stirring shit, and a great steaming pile of it he got, too.- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
That wasn't meant to happen.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'mooka' Meeka, where does it say I don't like women, yet again you are assuming you know all yet come out saying very little! First you attack me (well that was a given) then of course you accuse any woman who has the audacity to disagree with you of having double standards! That sounded positively bitchy! Messo, well said.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Mooka don't be putting words in my mouth. Pictures are not disrespectful it's the messages people send that are disrespectful. Sheesh. That goes without saying doesn't it? And yes sorry, I am calling the double standards card. I don't expect you to agree with me. That is my observation only. Can I ask a sincere question. Why is it always okay for other people to rant and rave, yet when I put my opinion forward I am accused of having issues with other people having an opinion? Is this not a discussion? Is your opinion the only valid one? Aren't we allowed to question or argue? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'deepbluesumthing'It's so apparent in forum threads like this one that there are some very wounded women commenting on a regular basis. They are increasingly prevalent on the threads and are all too ready to 'man bash' at the drop of a hat using double standards when it suits them and then crying foul when it doesn't. It is so obvious and little wonder that a lot of men are as confused as ever and are just too scared to point this out or say anything about it? Not to mention the men who support this kind of behaviour who are at best just wishful thinking and at worst deluded about the safety of their own status which doesn't really help the cause for anyone. Those males who do want more honesty and directness in confronting the white elephant are continually dismissed, while if you are a woman who not only understands what true 'equality' means but walks her talk daily then, by the same token, your opinion is often not welcome. Just paying lip service to it is not good enough if you can't follow through with your behaviour towards each other from the deepest part of your being. Would it be okay with you if your best friend blew smoke up your arse? It certainly isn't okay with me. Or are you all perfect too! I'm not! It's about time everyone got over themselves and manned up, womanned up about the part they are playing in the dynamic of a non-gender specific problem which affects us all. thats not wounded in some way.........and I will drag my unicorn out of the stable and here are some eggs, can you demonstrate to us all how to suck them? and I prefer to person bash myself, as on a cyber forum, one cannot always see the hidden nuts and were not just talking about the fake gender profiles here.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Messolonghi'Mooka, we have a civil society because there is a presumption of respect - for dignity, for rights, for personal freedoms. I can only presume you treat everyone like a cunt until they've "earned" something from you. Sad for you. (I never, *ever* use that word, either, btw, but it feels right in this context.) There is a whole lot of debate about what is not the topic. Yes, this place has wounded women and this place has wounded men, and this place encourages some double standards. But, the OP offered and sustained a blanket opinion which it would be folly to think wouldn't be taken at it's extreme. The OP (a man) said sluts should be treated as sluts. That is shorthand for loose women deserve poor treatment. There are a zillion contexts in which slut is OK, or has been reclaimed, or is even sexy. The op knew what he was doing. Stirring shit, and a great steaming pile of it he got, too.- Posted from rhpmobile Messolonghi, ah another making assumptions - how thoughtful! So you are saying you respect everyone until they demonstrate in some way a failing that will give you reason to withdraw that respect? You and I have not met, our only contact is by reading each other's forum posts yet you have shown discrepect towards me with your statement: "I can only presume you treat everyone like a cunt until they've "earned" something from you. Sad for you." To use your own words, how very presumptuous of yourself. In fact you have just proven the OP correct, you have judged me based solely on some words on the screen and think you can say what you like. Fine, it is the intent of forums for open and frank discussion, well as open and frank as the Admins will allow. But I am going to disappoint you, I will not retalliate, I will not lower myself to your levels and assume/surmise/belittle you just so I can feel superior. There is a chasm of difference between global respect and common decency. I have a firm understanding of what respect entails, three decades in the military will do that to anyone. I treat everyone I meet, I contact, I interact with initially at the same level - as I would like them to treat me. It is their actions after that, that then determine whether I give them the respect they deserve or not. I have been fortunate, I have meet people I give my upmost respect to, others who I respect but actually do not like, and some that I call my friends but do not respect.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'Mooka don't be putting words in my mouth. Pictures are not disrespectful it's the messages people send that are disrespectful. Sheesh. That goes without saying doesn't it? And yes sorry, I am calling the double standards card. I don't expect you to agree with me. That is my observation only. Can I ask a sincere question. Why is it always okay for other people to rant and rave, yet when I put my opinion forward I am accused of having issues with other people having an opinion? Is this not a discussion? Is your opinion the only valid one? Aren't we allowed to question or argue? - Posted from rhpmobile Meeka, I wasn't putting wording in your mouth, I was quoting you! To answer your sincere question: Most do not direct attacks at an indivisual, you do it quite often as you did here. Most will rant and rave but on a general level, they will not single out someone when others have said similar things and think they can get away it it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
How the hell can you respect someone you have never met and more importantly, know nothing about??? I can. As until I do meet that person, and until I find out there is something NOT right about them I will respect them. Just as I do the waiter that serves me food, or the shop assistant. Its called manners, was the way I was brung up all proper like. The sad thing is, that if we say, all men are this or all women are that, then everyone dives in like a fat kid on a smarty...see now your all going ooh god she said fat kid! Do you think Deep blue if you side with the boys all the time you will get more attention? Do you men think if you side with Meeka or the other hotties you will get more attention? I don’t think people do an automatic post re gender bashing, people just often take it that way. The word slut as you all know is, and always has been refereed to a WOMAN and you can bullshit yourself about that one as much as you like, but when its refereed to a male its followed by a pat on the back. Women love to use it to hurt other women and put them down in the public levels of our society. skanky slut comes to mind..heard that a few times. I like to think of sexual display as like a bird in a hot little mate dance, but that lil birdie then can pick her mate from the hot little fuckers that gather there. As for men profiles, I like to look at cocks if they are pretty and in the private gallery I do not like to see some ugly cock pop up in a profile first thing, especially when I am having my morning coffee..guys keep that thing tucked away in your private gallery. Its an unusual form of advertising here, its where you advertise the goodies to all, but then you are the consumer, you decide who you will have out of all of those who apply. slut marketing perhaps? some might say If a man treated me like a slut while I was up the street, or in a pub or what ever by coming up and grabbing me and assuming I will fuck him. I would be very cross indeed, and if he came to meet me with the same attitude of rhp I would not be amused. but If I decide he can treat me like some wild sluttish thing in the bedroom then that’s fine, I decide how I want to be treated under the right circumstance and with the right person. I also treat a man with respect no matter how many women, men , he has stuck his cock into. It does not make him a lesser person to me. Label’s are things you put on your home made jam.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Third rebuttal. I respond to people's actual comments stating whether I agree or disagree. I would have thought that was fair enough. No? Sorry to burst your bubble but "general" comments about bitter women, etc are not any better. People get am impression of others from things they frequently write. If you don't want people thinking those things don't write them.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'mooka' To answer your sincere question: Most do not direct attacks at an indivisual, you do it quite often as you did here. Most will rant and rave but on a general level, they will not single out someone when others have said similar things and think they can get away it it. Absolutely, unequivocally not true.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I'm feeling left out! So, I said: I work with drug addicts, some them them rather unpleasant at times. But I will always give them the respect I expect from them. Tuscan said: As until I do meet that person, and until I find out there is something NOT right about them I will respect them. Just as I do the waiter that serves me food, or the shop assistant. Mooka said: I treat everyone I meet, I contact, I interact with initially at the same level - as I would like them to treat me. It is their actions after that, that then determine whether I give them the respect they deserve or not. Are we basically not all just saying we treat others as we want to be treated?
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RHP User
13 years ago
What I said was "Men with cock pics sending out those "wanna fuck messages" don't respect women"And of course the gentlemanly photos that do the same as well. Sorry if I wasn't clear. People's pictures don't worry me at all. Kind of even like the young boys showing the bird even though I know most people don't. I find those pictures humorous.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'mooka' Meeka, I wasn't putting wording in your mouth, I was quoting you! To answer your sincere question: Most do not direct attacks at an indivisual, you do it quite often as you did here. Most will rant and rave but on a general level, they will not single out someone when others have said similar things and think they can get away it it. And that sir all I have to say is. YOU MUST BE ABSOLUTELY JOKING! PMSL. Let's agree to disagree as I am sure all these butts are getting boring for everyone. Plus I am procrastinating... gotta hop to it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
The topic might be a little too close for some OP. It is a good topic. Here is my take on it and some of the responses.Slut, like trollop or slattern, are just words to describe promiscuous women. However, it's used as an insult, usually by men but not necessarily only by them. However, at the end of the day, it is all about power. Men have lost a lot of power over women at the turn of the last century. They act this way to show they still have it. Labelling someone distances yourself from that person, making it easier to vilify or treat that person badly. Would you treat someone named Mrs Robinson badly or someone you call a slut? I think the latter rather than the former because you acknowledge Mrs Robinson as a person, perhaps someone who you meet everyday at the coffee shop or on the train. Likewise on this site, a lot of people are just usernames and profile descriptions. Some people are incongruous. They want to act in one way yet can't do it in public. They take the opportunity to explore this other side over here. The rest are pretty congruous, their private and public life are in agreement. People keep on saying this is primarily a sex site, thus a meat market for some. For others, they want something more. There are all sorts here. There are also some who disrespect themselves and others. Sad but true.
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RHP User
13 years ago
In the 1950's a very famous and beautiful married woman had an affair with a married man.They had a child and because of this, she was denounced from the floor of the US Senate.She was so villified that she was forced to leave the country. In thity minutes time I am going to watch her in Casablanca......
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RHP User
13 years ago
As for people having a go at each other. I would rather someone say hey TR you got that wrong, as well as the collective we on forum posts. I am a big girl , and yes I get pretty upset at times when things are directed at me but there is always the off button...nobody is chained to their computer ...ohhh maybe they are the dirty little fuckers I love these kind of posts at least they are not as booring as bat shit, but they soon get closed down when mummy rhp tells us to play nice.
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RHP User
13 years ago
If that's how it's spelt.. or was it Jane Russell. ?
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RHP User
13 years ago
The magnificent Ingrid Bergman.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Mooka, I didn't disrespect you. I took 3 lines of text you posted and responded to their implication. As part of that response, I articulated how I understood your approach to people to be, based on your 3 lines, and I actually empathised about it being a loss for you. I didn't call you names or suggest you we're overall a bad person. But I was strongly moved by what I read in your 3 lines, so my characterisation of the implications was strong. You replied with a clarification about social respect vs personal respect (my terms), which I understand and which render my concern about your 3 lines mollified... but I have to say, also mean your original three lines were irrelevant to this discussion. Your response was also, since we're talking about standards of discourse, pretty sanctimonious, condescending and superior in tone and intent, but that is by the by. As to the joy these threads bring... Tuscan, I guess I'm just not tough enough to see them as a bit of entertaining play fighting... I'm sure the op is chuckling, too, but they make me a bit :-( but I can't look away! (damn chains)- Posted from rhpmobile
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Cheekyarses
13 years ago
Pussycat n tuscanred - I must agree with you
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Jay_Me' Very well said. You echo my beliefs exactly... Specially the comment re wounded women. I,ve been subject to 'man bash ' by some of these wounded. No matter what I had to say ' they looked for a way to dismantle it to suit what it was they wanted to believe. Good to know there are still women out there that say it as it is and don't discriminate. You just restored my faith... Jay You're very welcome Jay.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I stand corrected... It was Ingrid Bergman. .. Smarty pants
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RHP User
13 years ago
Well that's it, no more from this black duck. Some people seem to be able to 'give criticism' but can't take it - received enough crap msgs. This place use to be fun, you could state an opinion and whilst others might disagree, it stayed on the forum. Evidently that is no more, but then I suspect for some this is the total exposure to their social life.
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RHP User
13 years ago
What's happening? Just block people if they are messaging you. Don't let it worry you. :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Bugga em.... There are those of us that know you're a better person than that... You can't change what other ppl say and do. You can only hope what you say and do people understand where your coming from... That's what makes us different... It'll blow over... The lovelies who used to think i was the devil In disguise ' love me now... Opps '. I'm outta here before I get a another serve... Jay
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'SINGLEFYI' My use of the term "Slut" was not ment to be gender specific. Good to see all the woman ASS U ME ing. What a nasty lot. Real quick to judge. Power to you all Then pick another term to describe the males and add that in. Slut is a term that is, in general, used to describe women, so really, the post reads as though it's about women only. Maybe you need to pick better terms.
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's true that many profiles seem to have double, triple and quadruple meanings. The name and title will often suggest free and easy and looking for loose love then you get to the fine print and see that they are in actual fact looking to take it very slowly and find a life partner. I tend to find those kind of profiles a warning, the lead lines are all about attracting attention and in a small way I see them as a deception. The other side of the coin is there are some pretty mixed up individuals lurking in places like this and I think a lot just have no idea what they want. The only advice I could offer is always approach someone with respect and see where that gets you. I'm not sure I'd want to be intimate with someone who doesn't appreciate a little respect.
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RHP User
13 years ago
where are yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah come out come out and play. dam I hate it when people pick up their bucket and spade and go home
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'tuscanred' where are yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah come out come out and play. dam I hate it when people pick up their bucket and spade and go home Maybe the Easter egg sugar rush has worn off.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'mooka'received enough crap msgs. This place use to be fun, you could state an opinion and whilst others might disagree, it stayed on the forum. That's a damn shame... I might disagree with you (on a specific topic or phrase), but you shouldn't have to suffer harassment of the inbox.
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Playful2looking
13 years ago
I am a slut there I have said it.. my theripist to;ld me to admit it to myself. I am coming out in front of the forum. I am a slut and I wear lacey panties. Oh and I let some men bonk me.and women sit on my face
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RHP User
13 years ago
Men that send out those "wanna fuck?" Messages don't even respect themselves, let alone anyone else. A man should be a leader, and you can't lead if you have a head full of expectations that you lay upon others before you follow suit. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Why should a man be a leader? I find most of the time they are not.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I was going to reply to this post when it first came up but after reading some of the inital responses shook my head and went keep out of this one. So out of courisity I showed it to a lady friend that likes the word slut used in the bedroom to see her reaction. First she understood the question and not being a RPH member was amused at some of the replys as she has used the term to describe some males along the way . It dose appear that your post OP has struck a raw nerve with some people I was brought up to not use the word to describe a woman but will admit to branding my EX with it and still do. As to your question yes there are so many profiled on here both male , femail and couples that you could ASSUME the person was only chasing a quick fuck mmmm dose it make them a slut tall call to ASSUME they all are. I was going to reply about some of the posts in regards to messages both to and from people with these profiles like this but I think I have made my point clear on a few occasions about replying to messages or the lack of. As someone very wise once said to me treat a lady like a whore and a whore like a lady.(he says tongue in cheek) Oh and before anyone gets their panties in a bunch about that comment and goes on the male bashing spree it was infact a lady that told me that.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I agree with others - there is a person behind the pics - but on the contrary, if you saw someone dressed like that in public you would definitely make those assumptions. I guess my thought are yes, this is a sex site but why do we all have to be naked? Why not be a little mysterious and let someone explore the goods for themselves.
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RHP User
13 years ago
"QUOTE"If in a profile a person has a risque name, photo, description and desires why do we ( I assume you mean WE as in WE men) get canned for treating them that way? I have never been canned for treating a man like a slut..... ie: Act like a slut = getting treated like one. Your thoughts.Well my thoughts are who cares as we are on a sex site! I expect to meet sexually active people....how they portray themselves on here is there business don't you think?! Would I call them sluts though and treat them like a slut!!! UMMMMMM hell no.... I have respect for MEN who fuck around and we tag then "sluts". I have respect for myself as well, HOWEVER I am not really sure why treating a "slut" is different to the way you would treat your mother or grandma for that matter. I just don't get it. Back tracking does my head in
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'lil_bit_angelic' Are we still really in THAT place?? OP I'm going to assume you're trying to stir the pot to amuse yourself. The alternative - that you're a simple-minded, judgmental, sexist cad - would be unlikely in this day, surely?! People are multi-faceted. We all have many aspects of our personality, our lives, our interests and so on. I'm very sexual. I like the chance to express just a little bit of that, anonymously, on this adult site. I have semi-naked, and sometimes naked, photos. Does that make me a slut? Available for any man who clicks his fingers and decides he feels like a fuck? I'm not here to meet up with men for casual sex, I'm ultimately looking for love and commitment, I'm not interested in gang bangs, phone sex with strangers and yada yada. Does that make me a prude? A boring root? Hardly. I'm neither. I'm me, and I'm happy being me. OP, the way you choose to judge someone and treat someone, based on knowing almost nothing about them, is a reflection on you, not on them. WELL SAID GIRLS!!! Couldn't agree more! Meeka you are spot on as usual & Angelic is wise beyond her years!
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RHP User
13 years ago
all i can ad is.Dont judge a RHP member by their cover. (In fishing we use certain baits and lures to attract target specimens. Unfortunately while fishing such baits and lures we attract non-targeted species.)
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