F56
Life is easier when you are one of the “beautiful people”
December 21 2018
Comments
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RHP User
7 years ago
The "Helpers", the Good Samaritans. Those who help with no thought for their own safety. Like the young man here in Sydney a few days ago who intervened when someone went on a rampage, and saved lives. He got stabbed, and nearly died. Luckily he is now recovering in hospital. A hero, a beautiful man.
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EarthQueen
7 years ago
Just because I don't agree with some of the things you said doesn't mean I don't value your input. Differences are what make us interesting. Hope you find what you are looking for.
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RHP User
7 years ago
Quoting 'Solitary'What I find beautiful is The "Helpers", the Good Samaritans. Those who help with no thought for their own safety. Like the young man here in Sydney a few days ago who intervened when someone went on a rampage, and saved lives. He got stabbed, and nearly died. Luckily he is now recovering in hospital. A hero, a beautiful man.I am glad to hear the young man is recovering in hospital! But I don't think it's that simple a thing to define a person by one moment in their life. You know, because that would make me a hero too judging by past actions when I was even more fiery than I am now. and Currently, I still let people in front at the shop if they only have one item. It is small moments like that make up the tapestry that is humankindness don't you think? You remember the trolley man? He turned a new leaf after his previous crimes were discovered and yet went back to his old ways within days even after the crowd funding on his behalf. I used to fall more for the whole Good Samaritan shtick but a lifetime of experience has demonstrated some of the most apparently beautiful spirits are only human. It's best not to put people on pedestals, it only gives them further to fall. Peachy
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RHP User
7 years ago
Quoting 'Mollymoet' So am I a bitter person all the time in life just because I stated 1 fact that was relevant to the thread topic?!? 😅🙇 The other part is true but, women much prefer a fake psychopathic personality over a normal or in other words unique one Nah, I like real people. My husband of 30 years is a real person. We've learned and grown together after difficult childhoods and he's my hero. Peachy
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RHP User
7 years ago
Fair point.
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RHP User
7 years ago
An interesting sidenote. A recent study suggested that stereotypically attractive women received better treatment from most men but worse treatment from women who did not embody stereotypical beauty standards, and better treatment from other women that did. "ugly" women had the opposite experience, worse treatment from most men, worse from "beautiful" women and better from other ugly women. Ugly men tended to be nicer to ugly women. Men face more of a duality. Attractive males are treated better by men and women alike. Ugly men were treated worse by the beatiful and ugly of both gender. Interesting point raised was that the standards for beauty, as decided by a panel, between the genders is very different. As a bloke, if you're muscular, have good facial symetry, and are hygienic, you fit the bill. As well as these, women were judged on bust, skin clarity (freckles) hairstyle, makeup, clothing, sound of voice, size of bum, and the list goes on. Moral of the story, it's hard to be "beautiful" as a woman, but it sucks being an ugly guy, which I can personally vouch for - I put in so much effort and nobody ever says that I'm a beautiful woman. For reference, the study used tone of voice, language used, compiments and willingness to assist as measring blocks.
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RHP User
7 years ago
I don't think the life as a whole is easier if you look physically beautiful, it doesn't give you extra powers that make problems of life vanish overnight. That may play a role when you are young but as life experience and maturity grow, personality, sense of humour, self-confidence and compassion, among other qualities, play such a greater role than just looking good. They make you charming and attractive, regardless of how beautiful you look. Also, some people are "designed" to look more physically beautiful at later stages in life. My last comment is, if you look too good, it's like being rich, it's not easy to know why people want to befriend you; for what you have or what you are?
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Dirtyandfriendly
7 years ago
I have this one thing happen to me and it really promoted looks. About 8 years ago I was with an 18 year old. Drop dead gorgeous, stunning, but wasn't arrogant about it. She actually was a bit of shut in. One night we went to Mornington for a night out with a friend of mine who just recently broke up with her long time boyfriend and was out for some action. she was very attractive too. So after my friend had taken 3 hours to get ready we went out and walked to where she was meeting some friends. I had one in each arm like a gentleman and I saw this massive line which in previous encounters I was waiting at least an hour. As I walked towards the line and proceeded to walk all the way back the bouncers called to me and ushered us through checking their ID and I was in absolute shock and to the dismay of the waiting cue. That situation made me feel like a king! The only reason I was allowed in was because of those 2. At the end of the night I had men come up to me and shake my hand congratulating me on my catch (which felt like a back handed compliment). So yes being attractive has it's advantages. But, she was bi and was super eager to play with another girl. We actually joined on here and searched for another female. In 5 months we found no one, nothing, a few interests, but we received a few replies to which indicated they felt intimidated by her looks. So it also has it's disadvantages. I think though once you get older you really appreciate someone who appreciates a person as a whole then just looks, a lot of trial and error at first and you really like to meet someone who has more than just looks. I think certain scenarios looks do make things easier of course, certain jobs do require attractive people and is accepted in society, would you choose an attractive personal trainer? big and fit? over an average looking one? If you are in a lingerie line or bonds promoter would you hire a model over an average Joe? I guess a question to ask as well is do people grade themselves and want the same in looks? I know a few who do Probably went off topic but oh well
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MrJingles
7 years ago
I always thought I was hot... Turns out Ive just got a great personality...
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bonefide
7 years ago
Maybe, depending how u look a life as a whole package. But I think isn’t it how we perceive that person and inter-react with them that make them beautiful, both on the inside and out. Maybe just maybe ????sometimes people can be more friendly, welcoming or trusting towards someone who is attractive. As people have alluded to, confidence is what u bring to the party, not all people are confident, but can work to develop it with time and develop the confidence to move forward. I’m not confident in Gym work around strangers, however very confident to assist in CPR at accident site to a complete stranger. Go figure.
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EarthQueen
7 years ago
Quoting 'Dirtyandfriendly' I guess a question to ask as well is do people grade themselves and want the same in looks? I know a few who do Probably went off topic but oh well I'm going off topic as well Maybe RHP should revise their looks option as a rating scale, how fun (ironic) If only the world weren't so judgy. We could all just have a face pic. now I'm rambling.... I wonder if cave men had measurable degrees of attractiveness? Was there an "influencer" caveman who presented the ideal, the benchmark, of cavemen everywhere? Probably not. Yet they say that we have evolved?
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usrightnow_Again
7 years ago
Quoting 'bonefide' As people have alluded to, confidence is what u bring to the party, not all people are confident, but can work to develop it with time and develop the confidence to move forward. I’m not confident in Gym work around strangers, however very confident to assist in CPR at accident site to a complete stranger. Go figure. Yeah, interesting that. I'm the same. No confidence around strangers, groups of people, even people we know, in social settings. However, in the workplaces I have been in, and within areas of interest, I have supreme confidence, which I'm sure some would perceive as arrogance. I make sure I know my area, inside out. I make sure I'm the best I can be and the most knowledgeable too. In the past, that has turned out to be quantifiably the best in the area or field concerned. That in itself will give you confidence but again, just in that area. With that kind of stuff, I've learned to back myself. When your work is infrequently wrong, you kind of say to yourself, "Well, this should be right". Like I said though, it doesn't transfer over beyond that field. Mr. urn. .
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RHP User
7 years ago
Why does this make me sad... I feel like I've drawn the short end of the straw cause I'm 20 but have hardly had any interaction and nobody seems do desire me
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RHP User
7 years ago
"You are old father William" the young man said And yet you incessantly stand on your head. "In my youth I feared it might injure my brain But now I'm perfectly sure I have none" Lewis Carroll. Firstly if you are happy to have a face pic here don't make people stand on their heads to see it. Secondly you have NO profile,how can you expect anyone to be interested in a blank space. If you are serious show that you are by spending some time filling in those blanks. Good luck Hugs Q
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Infovore
7 years ago
Quoting 'AnnieWhichway' It opens a lot of doors, get you in a lot of bedrooms, the better jobs. It helps everywhere in life. More than physical beauty ever will.iThis is a great observation. it's worth noting however, that common biases mean that people with conventional beauty (admittedly a moving target)are much more likely to be confident in the first place. It's no guarantee, of course, there are plenty of insecure pretty people, but statistically, being reminded of your attractiveness, or not having your lack of it pointed out consistently, is a large part of gaining confidence. "True" beauty is about more than just the outside, of course. When you only have the outside to make a judgement on, then pretty packaging is a much better starting position, first impressions do matter somewhat, for better or worse.
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Infovore
7 years ago
Quoting 'Mollymoet' I'm not sure why this is being talked about, when the only thing people are attracted to is 100% how you look and being with a woman means everything to a man obviously life is usually going to be devastating if you're not attractive You're not 100% wrong about everything (see what I did there?), but absolutes are rarely helpful, and and even less often true. Also I don't understand the person that said women like white Australian American etc men more than others, I'm positive they are last behind Latino Mediterranean Asian and even black men and non white women generally dislike white men even more so Generally, I'm sure you're right for some parts of the population. Odds are however, it's just your own biases helping you see that the people you're attracted to aren't as attracted to you as you might like. When it comes to turning heads or just generally getting attention based purely on physical attributes, I agree that in mainstream western society, "typically" attractive women have an absolute killer advantage. However, that isn't universally positive in all scenarios. I'm going to make some guesses here, so if I'm wrong on anything, it's only because I'm using myself as the main source of demographics. As a white, able bodied, heterosexual male that's mostly neuro-typical, I have it about as good as it gets all things considered. What those of us who discuss it in tech circles refer to as "playing life on easy mode". Sure, I've never turned heads and don't struggle with an inbox full of flirts and messages here, but I also don't have people assuming I'm at the meeting just to take dictation or get coffee. When I'm on public transport alone at stupid o'clock after a night out, I don't have to take any unusual precautions to protect myself. Random women don't walk up to me and say "You'd be a lot prettier if you'd smile more". Swings and roundabouts, my friend. I'm not meaning to pick on you personally, directly, but many of us have a lot of privilege, that we are completely clueless about, because we've always had it. On this site, a lot of our privileges don't transfer, and that's somewhat frustrating. My apologies to all if I've drifted off topic a little. A long day at work and a couple of drinks....
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RHP User
7 years ago
Some of the ugliest people I’ve met look good and vice versa. There are no absolute rules there are always outliers, that’s how nature works. Just be the best you can be.
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On_Safari
7 years ago
But ugliness goes to the bone. Looks might get you somewhere but if you're a nasty piece of shit karma WILL at some stage destroy you. Im not a fan of folks who outwardly tick the good looking box on rhp, yrs yes you might be and thats terrific for you. Personally I prefer the see my photo that way you can judge for yourself by any standards you so choose western, eastern, other....who cares. Yes beauty is subjective, thats why there's someone out there for nearly everyone. One persons gumby the clown could be another persons Adonis. Thats just the way life is..... I, like many others can relate, was told I was ugly for years and that no one would ever love me. And for a while I believed that....fast forward and now I'm told I'm beautiful.....I think its more important how people view themselves. Love yourself, for all your flaws....thats the healthiest kind of love anyone can have ~ Indy
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